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Posts by Debra Smouse

Debra Smouse is a life coach & Tarnished Southern Belle who helps people fall in love with their lives. An expert de-tangler, she believes in busting clutter as a path to clarity and that every woman is a vibrant and passionate being just itching to make their inner sex kitten roar.

Debra Smouse's Website

Determine What Will Make You Happy by Identifying Your Values

“Happiness is that state of consciousness which proceeds from the achievement of one’s values.” ~Ayn Rand

For too many years, I played the part of the perfect little southern girl: I kept my mouth shut and my opinions to myself. I dressed properly, including panty hose, slips, and girdles. I didn’t laugh too loudly in public. I did what I was told.

You see, I learned at an early age that I had to do this in order to always be seen as a “good little girl” (and avoid getting punished). I continued the same behavior after I got …

Overextending and Overachieving: Create Space in a Busy Schedule

“Beware the barrenness of a busy life.” ~Socrates

The spring of 2010 was all about the 3 H’s: hotels, hospitals, and hospice. I was in the midst of a busy quarter for my consulting business (the hotel part), and my mother had been diagnosed with lung cancer (the hospital and hospice part).

I’ll be honest—my relationship with my mother had been tenuous since my late teens. No matter how challenging a relationship has been, however, watching the slow and painful death of a parent is heartbreaking.

Want to know how I dealt with the loss and grief? I ran away

Create Better Days with Empowering Routines and Loving Rituals

“We are what we repeatedly do.” ~Aristotle

This past spring, I found myself floundering—stuck within an alternating cycle of feeling either overwhelmed or paralyzed.

The combination of creative tasks and deadlines typically drives me with a strong sense of purpose and fulfillment. However, though I had both curriculum to produce and blog posts to write, I struggled to form sentences.

Instead of filling pages with words and ideas, I consoled myself by eating chocolate and watching lots of bad TV.

Needless to say, none of this was any help in boosting my productivity or pulling me out of the doldrums. …