Dear Stephanie

I am sorry that your workplace is not how it was or should be.

Years ago we had a manager that became a nightmare, later we found out that she was undergoing IVF & her hormones were all over the place. My mothers traits got magnified when she went thru the menopause & she refused to get help to manage the symptoms.
Does your manager have a board who maybe pushing her to implement changes, she could be worried about her own position & capabilities?

I work in the care sector & although my workplace states “person centred care” that does not always appear to be the driving force on the ground & that can be both disheartening & a worry for those who use the service & or work there. If your work place has a mission statement you could use this to uphold your actions in prioritizing the way you put your clients wellbeing first. A good mission statement can be used as both a shield & a tool.

Dear ScottyDye

Your post deeply resonated with me, not that my situation was as dire & heartbreaking as yours, I am an only child, single parent & I knew that I would probably have a gap of about ten years to sort my shit out before stepping up to look after parents. Mum had cancer & our relationship was not an easy one, dad whom I adore & got on with, has dementia. 2016-2021 looked after both that nearly broke me 2022-2025 looking after my dad, had to make the heartbreaking decision to accept longterm residential care as I could not get timely & appropriate support for him to stay at home.
A person who doesn’t swim cannot save someone from drowning by going in over their depth. You are in that situation & you can see that the only wise recourse is to save yourself, this does not mean that you abandon your family but you help from a safe distance ie once you have left, you contact social services & appraise them of your grandmothers situation = wisdom & compassion for all parties.

A book that I found most helpful was – In case of spiritual emergency. The author has a blog http://www.catherine-g-lucas.com

I hope that you find the physical & emotional/mental resources quickly to help you on this journey
Kind regards
Roberta
P.s which country do you live in?

Dear Eva

You like everyone else deserve to be listened to, treated with love & compassion. This is how you must talk to yourself with kindness, I doubt at the moment your ex would treat the next woman any better, hopefully he will stay single until he has grown emotionally, but enough about him.
You now have the time & space to find your joys, explore new enviroments or revisit what made you smile before you even met this guy.
Life is too short & too precious to waste time & energy on ifs, buts & maybes. If you want a happier future, start planting those seed here & now. Your garden of happiness does not need any noxious weeds like your ex in it.
It is time for me to do my prayers, I will dedicate them to you & your happiness.
Kind regards
Roberta

Good Morning Anita

We are connected – thank you for being in my life even if it has thru the media of this forum because we are physically so many many miles apart that we can not enjoy a walk together or meet up for a cup of tea & a casual chat.
with love Roberta

Hi Peter
Lovely post, it described the hard to grasp concept in such an eloquent way.
I look forward to more positive input from you & those you find inspirational
Roberta

When one discerns the voices in the head – anger greed jealousy fear etc see them name, them they loose their power
When one feel love compassion empathy in ones heart name them & feel the light grow to nourish your self & others

Dear Kris

Do you mean me or Thomas or both of us in all/parts of your last post?#
I will certainly endeavor not to cross boundaries once I know about them.
I hope you find church uplifting tomorrow.
Best wishes
Roberta

Good Morning Confused

Thank you for your reply.

Like a lot of things in life it can be hard to see what comes first, but I think that by trying to practice patience in everyday moments helps break the cycle of suffering no matter what its roots. If I feel impatience arising whilst say cuing for groceries or gas I remember to take 3 long slow breaths & then I start wishing the people in front of me & the cahier …may you be happy. This is a good use of my time & does not leave room for anxious/negative thoughts to take hold.

Whilst journalling you may find that like a lot of humans we have different energy & emotion levels throughout the day. Me personally I am quite energetic physically & more receptive & resilient in the mornings. Then from about 4pm I start to get peopled out & want to slow down & quieten my surroundings. So I try to work with my natural rhythms, on days that I work late afternoon into early evening I take a siesta after lunch to recharge my batteries, so that I amin a good position to do my job well.

Also another thing to hold in mind even if it is an urban myth, is that there are natural lulls /silence occurs in any conversations/gatherings & that’s okay – even though many people feel uncomfortable with that gap it is not necessary to instantly feel something has gone wrong. if you were sitting around a campfire you would just peacefully watch the flames in a comfortable silence.

I wish you a cool weekend
Roberta