Posts tagged with “wisdom”
How I Overcame My Chronic Digestive Issues by Learning to Breathe Right
āIf you know the art of deep breathing, you have the strength, wisdom and courage of ten tigers.ā ~Chinese adage
Let me share a little secret: I started healing from decades of debilitating chronic digestive issues when I stopped looking for the next best solution and trying to heal. Instead, I did nothing. And I took a breath.
Let’s start at the beginning. I was diagnosed with Crohnās disease (an irritable bowel disease) at the age of eighteen, which would have marked the beginning of my oh-so-anticipated adult life, but instead, I thought my life was over.
I had every …
Please Donāt Fix Me: What True Empathy Is (And Isnāt)
āNo one mentioned until I was in late middle age thatāhorribly!āmy good, helpful ideas for other grown-ups were not helpful. That my help was in fact sometimes toxic. That people needed to defend themselves from my passionate belief that I had good ideas for other peopleās lives. I did not know that help is the sunny side of control.āĀ ~Anne Lamott
Iām a well-meaning empath.
If you share your problems with me, Iāll quickly make them my own. Iāll listen intently, feel deeply, and want to help. Iāll give you advice and solutions you didnāt ask for, then be annoyed …
Making Big Decisions: How to Discern the Whispers of Your Soul
āIntuition is the whisper of the soul.ā ~Jiddu Krishnamurti
“I can’t believe they are taking her side over mine. I gave this job soĀ many years, and she decides to walk in and mess it all up for me,” IĀ said to my husband.
A few years back, when I was working full time at my corporate job, I got into a disagreement with a team member. It spiraled out of control to the point where my boss then had to have aĀ sit-down with us. I was so humiliated and angry that he couldĀ not see my side.
They …
How Perfectionism and Anxiety Made Me Sick and What I Wish I Knew Sooner
āPerfectionism is the exhausting state of pretending to know it all and have it all together, all the time. Iād rather be a happy mess than an anxious stress case whoās always trying to hide my flaws and mistakes.ā ~Lori DescheneĀ
āThatās not how you do it!ā I slammed the door as I headed outside, making sure my husband understood what an idiot he was. Heād made the appalling mistake of roasting potatoes for Thanksgiving instead of making stuffing.
He was cooking while I studied, trying to make sure I got a semblance of a holiday. We lived away from …
5 Tips to Stop Comparing Yourself to Other People
āNo matter what you do, someone wonāt be pleased. Someone will think your choices are wrong. And someone will tell you what you should do instead. No matter which path you take, someone will seem to be doing better. Someone will have more than you. And someone elseās life may look more impressive on paper. If youāre being true to yourself, none of that will matter because youāll have something more satisfying than approval and the illusion of āsuccessā: a life that feels right for you, based on your own wants, needs, values, and priorities.ā ~Lori Deschene
Have you ever …
Are You Sick of Waiting, Wanting, and Wishing for a Better Life?
āPerseverance is not a long race; it is many short races one after another.ā ~Walter Elliott
I often find myself impatient with the pace of my progress. Waiting for my life to move forward can sometimes feel like I’m watching paint dry.
There are so many moments when we feel like our life is at a standstill. This is generally where I double down with my intensity. I hit it with everything I can. The crash comes soon after from the inevitable violent collision of my mind, body, and spirit as they’re pushed beyond their limits.
The idea of having …
When Things Have to Change: How to Find the Willpower to Achieve Your Goals
āWhen it is obvious the goals cannot be reached, donāt adjust the goals, adjust the action steps.ā ~Confucius
Do you want to know my biggest fear?
Iāve just come out of the closet, my parents have rejected me, and I am terrified, really, really terrified, because Iām completely alone, and the pain is unbearable.
But itās not just the rejection that terrifies meāitās also what happens after that.
With no one to turn to, I find comfort at the bottom of a bag of chips.
Three months and thirty pounds later Iāve yet to leave the confines of my bedroom. …
What Your Anger Is Trying to Tell You and How to Hear It
āWhen we embrace anger and take good care of our anger, we obtain relief. We can look deeply into it and gain many insights.ā ~Thich Nhat Hanh
It just took a few words from my husband before I felt my body move from calm to a boiling cauldron of rage. My whole being was alight, in flames. Energy felt like it was moving through me and shattering everything inside me.
I hated it. Anger is so intense, and so big, that most of us canāt bear to feel it in our bodies.
I wanted to do a lot of …
When Itās Time to Stop Helping Others and Help Ourselves
“Do your best and be okay with that.” ~Ursula Wharton
Late one evening I was doing some work at the last minute when my phone buzzed with a text from Alex, my neighbor’s boyfriend. He said he was rushing over and then I saw, “Chris is trying to kill herself. You gotta get in there and stop her.”
I felt sick to my stomach. I stood up too fast from my chair and dropped my phone onto the ugly grey carpet beneath my bare feet. I rushed to Chris’s apartment, which was right next to mine.
Thankfully, the door was …
Though I run this site, it is not mine. It's ours. It's not about me. It's about us. Your stories and your wisdom are just as meaningful as mine. 