Posts tagged with “wisdom”

Dealing with a Big Disappointment: How to Soften the Blow and Move On
âNew beginnings are often disguised as painful endings.â ~Lao Tzu
In the middle of a storm, it is difficult to see any way out. But on the other side, we usually can recognize a silver liningâsomething we gained from the experience that enhanced our lives in some way.
When my husband unexpectedly died and left me a single mother to three young children, I could not conceptualize anything good coming out of it.
Yet, years later, I am here to tell you that the gutting, heart-wrenching experience taught me invaluable lessons that have helped me to not just survive but …

Why I Attracted One-Sided Relationships and Gave More Than I Got
âI was once afraid of people saying, âWho does she think she is?â Now I have the courage to stand and say, âThis is who I am.ââ ~Oprah WinfreyÂ
In May of this year, I decided to take a personal development course, hoping to resolve some of my limiting beliefs and raise my confidence to pursue my professional goals.
The course turned out to be far different from what I thought it would be, and it blew my mind. In just three days, I transformed the way I functioned in most of my relationships.
A week before the course, I …

All the Ways I Tried to Numb My Loneliness and What Actually Helped
âA season of loneliness and isolation is when the caterpillar gets its wings.â ~Mandy Hale
I feel so alone right now. Like, crawling out of my skin, Iâll do anything I can do to not feel this way alone.
I havenât felt this way in a long time. Thank goodness I have tools to take care of myself. Let me explain.
My earliest childhood memory is my motherâs empty bed. The sheets are white, untucked, and messy. The duvet cover is loose and hanging halfway on the floor. The room is quiet, thereâs no sign of mom, and I …

How I Lighten My Mood by Making a Bargain with the Universe
âPain is what the world does to you; suffering is what you do yourself.â ~Gautama Buddha
I donât expect things to be a steady state of bliss.
In fact, I agree with the Buddha that suffering is pretty much part of the human condition. Our expectations just get in the way of our experiences. Iâm talking about your garden-variety suffering here, not the kind that comes with traumatic events that take you out at the knees or devastating clinical depression.
I see the now-and-then emergence of lethargy or melancholy as part of the whole emotional spectrum. And, like stepping in …

The Truth About Mr. S.: The Sexual Predator from My High School Band
TRIGGER WARNING: This post deals with accounts of sexual harassment and assault and may be triggering to some people.
âThere can be a deep loneliness that comes from not having a family that has your back. I hope you can find supportive people who show up for you.â ~Laura Mohai
I feel and have felt extreme sadness, anger, isolation, and fear over several sexual harassments and assaults in my life.
The first time I was sexually assaulted I was seven. I was at a friendâs birthday pool party. My friendâs dad put his hand down my swimsuit and grabbed my …

How to Be a Lot Happier: A Simple Solution
âSimplicity is the ultimate sophistication.â ~Leonardo da Vinci
Thereâs a funny thing with us humans.
We spend our lives trying desperately to find happiness, and yet we donât even know what it is. We canât explain, describe, or define it. We just know that we want it because itâll make everything peachy. Time and time again, though, studies have shown that our never-ending quest for happiness is quite often the very thing that makes us miserable.
Trying to find happiness is an exercise in futility. This is a truth I did not easily come to realize. It took a …

10 Signs Youâre in a Toxic, Unhealthy Relationship and How to Help Yourself
âLove is never any better than the lover. Wicked people love wickedly, violent people love violently, weak people love weaklyâŠthe lover alone possesses his gift of love.â ~Toni Morrison
Not all relationships are created equal. Some rage in like a storm and leave you far weaker than you were before. As you try to process the wreck that is now your reality, you wonder, how did I end up here?
I found myself in a toxic and addicting relationship in my mid-late twenties. Now that some time has passed and allowed for reflection, I want to pass on some signs …

How Trauma Can Cause Mental Illness (It’s Not Just a Chemical Imbalance)
âWhat seems to be clear is that we humans are an accumulation of our traumatic experiences, that each trauma contributes to our biology, and that this biology determines, to some extent, how we respond to further traumatic events as they emerge in our lives.â ~Shaili Jain
The stigma of mental health is decreasing. Thatâs wonderful, but the way weâre doing it is wrong and damaging. We are ignoring the trauma that is so prevalent and pervasive in our society.
Think about how many times youâve read something equating mental illness to cancer or some other disease. People say that taking …