Anita,

It is almost 8pm nothing from K.  I’m trying not to over react but I’m pretty upset.  I don’t know if it’s worth continuing a friendship at this point. I just don’t understand people.

Lindsey

Anita,

i am only thinking of him as a friend and I don’t have anxiety. If I start to think other stuff my anxiety goes crazy so I don’t. This mindset is for the best. I am not ready for dating based on how my anxiety goes crazy.  Not ready at all.  Thank you for your guidance during this difficult week.  I’m grateful I fixed myself before I messed the friendship up.

Lindsey

Anita,

I understand. I agree with what you are saying.  I feel sad with myself for my behaviors, again.  I’m going to try the very best I can.  I’m only going to think of him as a friend.  I let it get out of hand this week.  I’m really trying.  This is really hard.

Lindsey

Anita,

Ok. So I am wondering if I should try another anxiety medication that was prescribed I just haven’t filled it yet because I feel like I’m on my last leg here.   He was just busy yesterday.

I’m still processing things because he texted me later last night and said 1. he is not sure what this is regarding liking me as this is new. 2. not sure he’s ready to see someone 3. we work together.  He stated he’s attracted to me and wants to continue our friendship.  He does not want any expectations.  Then asked me to lunch this weekend.  Also if I’m looking to find someone don’t let him stop me from seeing people.  He doesn’t want to ruin our friendship over sex.

I feel really exhausted.

Lindsey

Anita,

OK I’m going to try and focus on it.  I really need to get to that place you are right.  I agree that a text stating “just busy” is not alarming.  However, when you text back and forth with someone multiple times a day, it’s odd.  So something is off, hopefully he is busy and just having a day where he doesn’t want to talk.  However, is this how he handles situations? Remember when the roommate’s ex came to town and he went off the grid so to speak and didn’t text for awhile?

Lindsey

Anita,

i had a very good session with my counselor.  I am still getting bothered and tend to measure the lengths of my conversations with K. That is bringing the most anxiety. Today since I have been at work we have barely talked when yesterday or the day before we may have talked more at work. It makes my anxiety spike.

Im trying to be positive and journal as she suggested.  I’m trying to remember positive things and not think foolish thoughts like over the course of a day or few days he is no longer interested suddenly.

I find this extremely hard to manage. On hour I will be fine and thevnext hour I’m in a panic.  At some point she suggests having a conversation with him about my anxiety.

Lindsey

Anita,

I’m not exactly sure what’s going on today but I feel like I’m on the verge of a panic attack.  I feel like constant worry.  This morning I had worry about K not talking to me as much in the morning after he got here but I feel like I’m being irrational-how to you measure not talking enough and it doesn’t have to be talking to same amount of time every morning.  Then my mind starts to tell him he’s not going to talk to me anymore and I know this is not true.  I feel like I can’t get a handle on my panic and I have no idea why it’s doing this for no reason.  There is nothing stressful going on.

Lindsey