Anita,

No we had just finished eating and I was watching the TV above the bar.  He put the check beside me and knocked on it was his finger.  I looked at him and said “are you kidding.”  He said no you should pay  this time. I paid last time we went to dinner.  I just looked at him.  Then I said if you are being serious I’m going to get up and walk out.  Dinner conversation did not go well and I was just ready to be done.  He got up and walked outside to smoke and was muttering to himself.

While I was waiting I thought to myself I bet he is going to leave. But he came back.  That’s exactly what he said with a smile on his face. He almost decided to leave.  As he was saying I should at least pay for half I grabbed my things and walked out of the restaurant.

Lindsey

Anita,

Once I dropped of the kids to school I came home to an empty home.  My ex sent a message from the parenting app “reminding” me that he will pick up the kids on Thanksgiving at 2pm and return them at 8pm.  It makes me very sad because what am I going to do all day?  I’m not with my family or my extended family.

He continues to be very passive aggressive.  On Saturday Ella and I took Aiden to a batting cage for a batting contest with teams of kids.  I was told he would have a game at 5-we got there at 4. He further stated it would be over by 6-Aiden and his team would not win against that team.  No only did he play at 6 he also played at 7.  Ella and I left at 7:30 because she was bored and we were both hungry.   For the last 2 months he has been doing drop off at a vet’s office by my house.

Sarah was there with Brayden and we were talking on the couches and walking around.  Sarah is Dan’s husband.  Dan is Amy’s ex husband.  Amy is my ex’s girlfriend.  Bradyen is Amy and Dan’s son.

My ex has made comments about Sarah and I being friends. That night he dropped Aiden off in front of my house.  On purpose  because of Sarah and I at the batting cages talking.  He knows he is not allowed on my property.

So I’m just feeling down.  My father asked if I would come up for Christmas to visit for the weekend and take the kids back home with me.  I said ok but changed my mind. It is not healthy for me to be around my mother. Not at all.  I would come home and lose the emotional gains I have made.

Lindsey

Anita,

I will try my best to make this clear.  In my opinion there was a disconnect with texting.  He felt by statements I made that I was trying to rush into a relationship. (I asked him if he wanted to see a picture of my dog and he said that’s what people do when they are in a relationship. According to him I had just broken up with my boyfriend so I wanted to get into another relationship quickly.  I gave some recommendations for movies when his car was in the shop and he said I was telling him what to watch)  However, at other times he would give the impression that we were not short term.  That if he wanted to hook up that he would not ask me to do things with him.  He made comments more than once about me probably talking to multiple guys.  When I would not send a photo of my ex to him he said that it’s because my ex is better looking.

I felt pressure by his statements that he was trying to sleep with me or rush into. I felt protective of myself with sex. (He said once you start kissing and other things it leads to sex right then.  There is no “messing around” at times and then later that lead to sex down the road.

His stories sound bizarre.

I believe he may be codependent once in a relationship.  That when he feels pressure he gets rude.  He says he felt pressure when we went to dinner.  (We were supposed to talk about what we wanted moving forward-this was his idea by the way).

Lindsey

Anita,

So I am having to reschedule mediation for a week or two because I cannot get off work.  While I would like for it to be over rescheduling is not a big deal.

I’m not doing well and I don’t know why.  It’s the dinner with Jason.  I don’t know how to explain the atmosphere to you at dinner but I felt embarrassed, hurt, confused, and wanted to get up and leave.

I didn’t take control of the situation to help myself.  I didn’t say the things that were on my mind. We make our on closure and move on from things that do not matter yet it’s hard.

Everything is the same other than that.  Trying to figure out Thanksgiving brunch plans with the kids.

Hope you are well-

Lindsey

2nd Addition

maybe I shouldn’t care at all about any of it.

lindsey

Anita

he had asked me to dinner to discuss us. He was on the fence about continuing to date. I had ignored his texts where he was saying that but he persisted and I answered his text. I agreed to met him for dinner that Friday.  I changed my mind and didn’t text him like agreed. But he texted later and I agreed.

Apparently he decided he didn’t want things to continue during dinner. And I sat there feeling embarrassed. It almost felt like he set the situation up on purpose. To be the one saying no while I sat there. That sounds odd I know.

I should of never went to dinner. Or responding to him.

lindsey

Anita

I enjoyed reading her post.  It was spot on.  I am almost prepared for mediation tomorrow.  I’m calm about it because the things we will be going over in my opinion are not argumentative.

My friends and Jason have said they do not understand my texting most of the time.  In fact this has caused some issues with Jason.  I feel like this is just another issue of mine.  I’m not even sure what I am doing wrong because it makes sense in my head. I do think I just text fast, don’t proof read before I send it.  However-this is the way I text.

I’m tired and I don’t think I want to see Jason anymore.  I do not think he has the patience to deal with my issues.  I have made it very clear from the beginning that I have anxiety and I can be reactive.  Right now he is thinking about if he wants to continue and we are going to talk tomorrow.  I’m ready to just say forget it.

Lindsey

Anita,

More like he’s been right before about the guys I picked being “losers” and just wanting to sleep with me.  What if he’s right again?  There is anxiety with the situation I cannot pin point.  Maybe everyone I pick will be a loser? He’s said in a tough love way that I have some major issues.

Also yes a little disappointment because he doesn’t approve (but I don’t think he will ever approve due to his crush)

I like the attention but only to an extent from him.  I mean we are friends.

Lindsey