Jasmine, you know me so well!! LOL

I got your meaning ~ and I will try too!!! 🙂

Dear Matt,

The smiley faces were there to cut down on your aggression and to show that I’m not aggressive towards you. I don’t know, it seems everything I write to you is Wrong, somehow. You’re the only one on the forums that seems to think so. We all appreciate your wisdom, just please stop with the analogies.

Not a wolf in sheep’s clothing and not a sheep either!

Peace 2,

Inky

Hi dear lee,

Karen did talk to the wife.

What usually happens is wanting to believe that the husband is getting out of his “dead” marriage.

Then the dreaded, “If your man was cheating on you would you want to know” question. Which is really for the other woman or friend caught in the middle to feel better.

The wife is of two minds (when confronted with the truth against her will which she kind of knew anyway):

1. He cheated on me therefore I am honor bound to leave.

2. Why throw away 20 years of a marriage and children for some !@#$-y dumb girl?

So she (honor-bound) makes the husband win her back. Then they (both!) label the girlfriend as a crazy stalker type.
And guess what, they believe it! Pretty quickly. They have way, way too much to lose: a well run house (with 2 incomes to support it), kids, lifestyle, common friends.

They think of her as a Monica Lewinsky, and the husband as a poor defenseless schmoe who has as much importance as the leader of the Free World.

P.S. The wife is always Hillary.

• This reply was modified 9 years, 10 months ago by Inky.

😉

You’re “on call” yourself, yes?

• This reply was modified 9 years, 10 months ago by Inky.

OMG.

In the beginning every woman says to herself, “Married men are off limits.”

Then as we get older it’s “Every man, married or going through a separation/divorce is off limits.”

Now I’m thinking, “Every man, married, separated, or divorced with kids under 18 are off limits.”

There is way, way too much drama. The wife! The faux separation!! The kids!!!

Then the man (and the wife and all her friends) makes you, yes, YOU, into this conniving, seducing, siren who dabbles in witchcraft. Who is obsessed. Who is jealous of the children. Who is desperately jealous of the wife.

Leave a *Message* on the home phone and say “I can’t believe you lied to everyone. Don’t you *EVER* call me again!” (He did call you!) This way YOU are putting HIM in his place and ending it on YOUR terms. Then block his number(s). Bury it. If people bring it up, say that he said the divorce was almost over and you believed him.

LIFE LESSON LEARNED.

Then forgive yourself and hold your head up.

Unitarian or Quaker churches might be good for you to check out ~ all of the ones I’ve been in are filled to the brim with other Cause Fighters. Or they’ll know someone. Or they’ll help you with your projects. P.S. They are crazy-open minded!

Another thought ~ Sometimes an ex will call out of the blue to “test the energies”, not of you, but for themselves. They are looking for that energy of “the way things were”. The problem is, everyone grows and changes, and their old lines sound tired, even to themselves.

You were broke up for a reason. You two aren’t as young carefree people anymore, you are now a little more older grown ups. The energy of a 25 year old can be vastly different from a 30 year old’s. (You did bring up age!) 🙂

“Let the sperm chase the egg.” Meaning, let him do all the work. Yes, you can call him back, or say, “Sure, you want coffee? Let’s have coffee,” but you should really drop the rope. You tested the energies yourself and found they weren’t up to standards. You are the gatekeeper too, of your own heart.

Go out and meet someone new! 🙂

What in the world are your dreams?? You can have a Fail-Safe clause to them. So they technically become true.

Dream of Acting? YouTube Videos. Make your own Indie Film. Submit to film festivals.

Author? Blog. Self-Publish. Have local bookstores carry them.

Living on beach? Get shore shack instead of beach mansion.

That said, I totally get the burn out. So take dream vacation until you get inspired again. But by the New Year, have a dream that you could actually make come true. This year, get a job, any job.