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Toxic Masculinity and the Harmful Standards We’re All Expected to Meet

By in Blog, change & challenges

Recently I woke up uncharacteristically early for a Saturday to meet a friend and her baby for coffee. I am embarrassed to say that by “uncharacteristically early” I mean 8:30am, which is not that early. I get it.

As I walked by two chipper twenty-something-year-old girls in skintight leggings either in route to or on their way back from a workout class, I found my mind reeling.

Why is it that I see so many more women in New York City whenever I wake up early on the weekends? Why do they seem so much more productive than men?

I …

How I Stopped Worrying All the Time and Started Feeling Good About Life

By in Blog, change & challenges, happiness & fun, letting go, love & relationships

“We don’t see things as they are. We see things as we are.” ~Anais Nin

When I was young, I used to stare out into the big, blue sky and ask, “Is this really the right place?” “Did they drop me off on the wrong planet?” I wondered.

It felt like I didn’t fit in or belong. Things seemed so much easier for others. They moved forward with ease even when something was painful, while I felt an arrow pierce my heart every time a loved one was in pain, or a difficult situation arose.

When I looked around, I …

The Areas of Our Lives We Need to Balance to Find Peace and Contentment

By in Blog, happiness & fun, mindfulness & peace

“Happiness is not a matter of intensity but of balance, order, rhythm and harmony.” ~Thomas Merton

Balance is everything and is really what we are striving to find in life. Balancing work and play. Balancing food and exercise. Balancing a social life and solitude. Balancing being and doing. Finding balance is finding freedom.

Once I was truly able to comprehend this it was a game changer on my healing journey. Any suffering you experience in life can be attributed to a lack of balance.

What is balance? The ancient Chinese philosopher Lao Tzu speaks of The Dao, which …

10 Positive Things to Do for Yourself in the New Year

By in Blog, change & challenges, happiness & fun, healthy habits, mindfulness & peace

I think I know you pretty well. I know I don’t know you, know you, but I’m guessing since you’re here, you’re a lot like me.

You want to be your best self. You want to make the most of your life. You want to be the best you can be, physically and mentally, for the people around you. And you quite possibly will take a little time today to think about what you should embrace or release in the year ahead to boost your happiness and make a positive impact on the world.

Maybe you’ll make a list …

A Natural Approach to Mental Health: How to Reduce Anxiety Through Gardening

By in Blog, healthy habits, mindfulness & peace

“When the world feels like an emotional roller coaster, steady yourself with simple rituals. Do the dishes. Fold the laundry. Water the plants. Simplicity attracts wisdom.” ~Unknown

I’ve suffered from anxiety since my childhood, but it was only seven years ago that I was formally diagnosed.

My symptoms began to get worse after my long-term relationship ended and I felt like my world had collapsed around me.

I was suffering from extreme fatigue, having trouble concentrating, not sleeping well, and I was constantly worrying.

Over the next couple of years my mental health continued to deteriorate, and I had trouble …

No One Starts Off at Their Best – Why We Need to Keep Going Anyway

By in Blog, meaning & passion

“Others have seen what is and asked why. I have seen what could be and asked why not.” ~Pablo Picasso

This article is about the day I realized Picasso wasn’t born Picasso.

If you’re already opening Google to find what his name was at birth, I’ll save you the typing and tell you here…

He was born Pablo Ruiz Picasso. (His baptized name is wayyyy longer, but you get the point.)

Okay, so he was always a Picasso.

But he wasn’t always the Picasso.

Let me explain by rewinding a few years back…

I was in Spain for one of …

The Benefits of Solitude and How to Get the Most from Your Alone Time

By in Blog, healthy habits, mindfulness & peace

“Understand that healing and growing can distance you from people who you once had a bond with, and it can also bring you closer to those who will heal and grow with you. The time in between can be difficult, but there is so much to learn in solitude.” ~ @themoontarot

There have been many occasions in my life where I’ve felt lonely. Some of these times I remember as incredibly painful; other times, I’ve relished in my solitude.

During some periods, I’ve even forced myself into seclusion, which comes easily to me as an introvert.

One thing all of …

How to Better Manage Stress So Little Things Don’t Set You Off

By in Blog, change & challenges, mindfulness & peace

“It’s not stress that kills us, it’s our reaction to it.” ~Hans Selye

I was driving home from work, minding my own business, when a car cut in front of me.

Pretty common in Sydney traffic, right? Normally, I would just brush it off.

But not today. For some reason I couldn’t explain, that simple event set me off. I got so irritated that I pressed both my hands on the horn and started shouting at the other driver—who just gave me the finger and continued on his merry way.

That’s when I lost it. How dare he do something …

Choose Joy and You’ll See the World with a Brighter Perspective

By in Blog, happiness & fun

“We cannot cure the world of sorrows, but we can choose to live in joy.” ~Joseph Campbell

It’s been just under five years now since I had a head injury that changed my life forever.

Unfortunately, I spent more than two years going to multiple kinds of therapy and doctors several days a week and ultimately had to stop working. I was devastated.

I loved my career as a special educator and school administrator. I’d been in classrooms since I was twenty years old, and here I was at fifty-seven, suddenly unable to return to a school in any capacity …

How to Overcome Ultra-Independence and Receive Love and Support

By in Blog, love & relationships

“Ultra independence is a coping mechanism we develop when we’ve learned it’s not safe to trust love or when we are terrified to lose ourselves in another. We aren’t meant to go it alone. We are wounded in relationship and we heal in relationship.” ~Rising Woman

Do you feel like you have to do everything on your own?

Is it difficult for you to ask for and receive help in fear of being let down?

Have you ever heard the expression “Ultra-independence may be a trauma response”?

If this is you, I get it; that was me too.

Please know …

10 Easy Responses to Use When People Ask Why You Aren’t Drinking

By in Blog, healthy habits

Embracing the holiday season can sometimes mean embracing alcohol with gusto… or not. Fortunately for those who choose the former, “Dry January” has caught on over the years and it’s a fantastic concept. Going through a refresh is a perfect way to rid the toxins and melt the bloat away.

I’d like to throw out a radical idea, or should I say a radical self-care opportunity!

How would your holidays feel without alcohol?

You might gasp looking for a chair to sit down as you frantically wonder how on earth you would get through the parties, relatives, house guests, and …

BetterHelp: The World’s Largest Online Therapy Platform

By in Blog, change & challenges

**Though this is a sponsored post, you can trust I only recommend products and services I personally love!

If you’re like most people, you’re probably starting to consider the goals and dreams you’d like to pursue in the New Year.

Maybe you’re visualizing the person you want to be, reflecting on what you hope to accomplish, and strategizing about everything you need to do (and stop doing) to finally feel happy with your life.

Most of us spend our lives chasing happiness, checking accomplishments and milestones off a life to-do list, as if each pen stroke brings us one step …

How Life’s Daily Challenges Can Actually Be Gifts in Disguise

By in Blog, change & challenges, mindfulness & peace

“Smile at your patterns.” ~Tsoknyi Rinpoche

Partway through Eckhart Tolle’s Conscious Manifestation course, I furiously jotted down his teachings about challenges and obstacles to remind myself that they’re not only a normal part of the human experience but necessary for spiritual growth. “Yes!!!!” I wrote in agreement.

When faced with difficulty, the human tendency is to react and resist, and when we do this, we add suffering to an already difficult situation. This tendency is reflexive within me, and my mindfulness practice has enabled me to either observe the cascading habit pattern as it unfolds, which disentangles me from its

…

Ending My Toxic Relationship with My Mother Was an Act of Self-Love

By in Blog, letting go, love & relationships

“It’s okay to let go of those who couldn’t love you. Those who didn’t know how to. Those who failed to even try. It’s okay to outgrow them, because that means you filled the empty space in you with self-love instead. You’re outgrowing them because you’re growing into you. And that’s more than okay, that’s something to celebrate.” ~Angelica Moone

I was taught to love my family and to just accept the love they give. With the passage of time and the dawning of maturity, I began to doubt this kind of unquestioning love. The chronic emotional and mental stress …

5 Simple Ways to Overcome Your Mind’s Constant Judgments

By in Blog, letting go, love & relationships

“It’s easy to judge. It’s more difficult to understand. Understanding requires compassion, patience, and a willingness to believe that good hearts sometimes choose poor methods. Through judging, we separate. Through understanding, we grow.” ~Doe Zantamata

If you don’t live in a cave, you have probably noticed two things. First, there are a lot of annoying, incompetent, stupid, and very difficult folks living in this world. Second, assuming you agree with my previous sentence, you have a very judgmental mind.

For better or worse, you’re not alone. A hundred thousand years ago, the ability to judge people quickly helped our species …

Why I’d Rather Be Vulnerable with People Than Pretend I’m Perfect

By in Blog, love & relationships

“Give up being perfect, for being authentic. Give up the need to be perfect, for the opportunity to be authentic. Be who you are. Love who you are. Others will too.” ~Hal Elrod

I’m not perfect. Not that this would come as any kind of surprise to anyone who knows me. But I often feel pushed in the direction of trying to represent myself as someone who has it all together. Especially because of the nature of my work as a coach and facilitator. What about you? Do you ever feel like you’re putting on a show for others?

The …

Why I Despised My Skin Color & 5 Strategies That Improved My Self-Image

By in Blog, change & challenges, love & relationships

“Beauty begins the moment you decide to be yourself.” ~Coco Chanel

I believed I was ugly and blamed it on my dark skin. I hated my skin color. Looking back, I realized it’s because I didn’t fit in with the white kids, nor did I fit in with the black kids.

I am mixed race. I have a black father and a white mother. Until I started school, I never considered myself different. My family and I were close, and I felt love and acceptance.

When I started second grade, I developed a crush on a boy, who never noticed …

Healing After Heartbreak: How to Turn Your Pain into Your Greatest Superpower

By in Blog, letting go, love & relationships

“Blessed are the cracked, for they let in the light.” ~Spike Milligan

Ever since I was a little girl, Disney films, story books, family, and friends unconsciously conditioned me to believe that the definition of happiness was a knight in shining armor galloping into my life to rescue me, sweeping me away, soothing all my problems as we ride off into the sunset to live happily ever after.

However, it’s fair to say, that fairytale didn’t play out how I’d expected in real life. Nor does it for most, if any of us.

For much of my teenage years, I …

Book Giveaway, HumanKind: Changing the World One Small Act at a Time

By in Blog, love & relationships

The other day, while scrolling through my Facebook feed, I came across the kind of uplifting story that makes my exhausted-mom-bleeding-heart melt.

It was from a mother who’d decided to fly alone with her two-year-old and five-year-old, only to find herself overwhelmed by two screaming, overtired children.

I can imagine the stress and anxiety she felt, given that I often feel that way just sitting in my living room with my poor-sleeping baby and high-energy toddler—which is why I almost shed a tear when I read about the other moms who stepped up to offer help.

One fellow mama let …

Feeling Burnt Out? Meet Toxic Productivity & Grind Culture with Rest

By in Blog, change & challenges, healthy habits, letting go

“Caring for myself is not self-indulgence, it is self-preservation, and that is an act of political warfare.” ~Audre Lorde

When you hear the word “productive,” you likely think of something positive: busting through that work assignment, making your house sparkly clean, or crushing your hobby.

Productivity is what we all aim for, right? On workdays and even on our days off, we seek to make something happen.

Grinding and hustling are seen as admirable, and something to work toward, always.

If we fall short, we beat ourselves up, and sometimes even drag ourselves off the couch to force …