Good night, SadSoul. Don’t worry, Australia is a HUGE continent. No one can find you here, in this little tiny (TINY) buddha website. I am here since May 2015, using my real name, anita: and no one found (or tried to) find me.

Anonymously yours,

anita

Dear SadSoul: I slept surprisingly well, thank you. Friday morning here, early morning. I like early mornings. I hope that you sleep well tonight!

anita

Dear Cheerful Little Sunflower SadSoul:

Grass mowed, yes, well done!

“I don’t want to lose the freedom to kill myself doing my sport“- the freedom to kill yourself.. hmm. Don’t kill yourself.

It is Fri night here, I have to get up early in the morning and participate in a some small town celebration I don’t care about. I can’t focus on much right now, red wine and all. If I could, I would wipe away shame and guilt off from you. And from me, completely. And BE, EXPRESS, FREELY. You and me, BE, just be.

anita

Dear SadSoul:

Just came back from the not a small-town events, but medium-town event, not where I live, but in the same county: parades, vendors, high school band and cheerleaders, local businesses parading, throwing kisses to the crowds, horses and Mexican dancers, Christian churches offering free water and popcorn.. TIRED.

anita

Dear SadSoul:

“I look forward to hearing about your cool parade day“- during the parade/ festivities, on a few occasions, in my own mind, I found myself telling you about what I was observing. I walked a lot during the 8 hours I was there. There was music and I enjoy the last 2 songs only, and even danced to them just a bit (how can one not dance to “I want to dance with somebody”, an impressive imitation of Whitney Houston’s 1987 video performance). The hands-free pie eating context: I was/ am too old to derive pleasure out of that kind of thing, walked away before it started, waste of pie.

“We pretty much nailed it! I’m exhausted now but also feeling satisfied with myself on this particular point“- when team-work works/ when people work well together.

“My son sent me a text! It’s so hard not asking him to catch up… That ball is firmly in his court waiting for him to serve it. Patience young padawan!“- this is what a good mother does.

Talking about Star Wars (from path of the jedi. com): “Anakin Skywalker’s attendance to the Jedi Academy was actually denied by the Jedi Council. He was already too old by that time and the Council was concerned by all the uncertainty they sensed from him. Believing that Anakin was the Chosen One who would ultimately bring balance to the Force, Qui-Gon saw this rejection as only a temporary set back but one that had to wait until more pressing matters were resolved on the planet of Naboo… It was at this moment on the hanger boarding their ship that Qui-Gon tells him, ‘Your focus determines your reality.’ Qui-Gon was the epitome of mindfulness, and fair or not, he believed this a valuable lesson for the young Anakin. After all, it’s never too soon to start training the Chosen One”-

– paralleling this to you: like Anakin Skywalker, you are currently denied attendance to your son’s life. Like Anakin, you feel uncertain. You can view this rejection as a temporary setback.  it’s never too late for you to Choose your Focus on any day (and to choose peace-of-mind and calm because that would serve you- and those you care about- best).

anita