Hello, I am looking for some guidance as to how to be there and support someone that has been in my life for 3 years. We are not boyfriend and girlfriend but we treat each other like it (confusing i know) Lets just say hes as committed to me yet but we are only seeing each other and no one else and spend a lot of time together. early this morning my friends/lovers dad died… is wasnt a unexpected death they knew the dad had cancer has been in the hospital over 3 months and now he has passed. I feel like i am in a weird place as to what i should do or say or how much i can do or say. being that he has not committed to me i have never met his family they know nothing about me. so i wouldn’t except to sit next to him at the funeral. but im starting to wondering if me even going to the funeral is my place? if i go i would be just like a stranger sitting in the back. and if i dont go i will feel like i didnt support him or afraid that he would think that i am insensitive or do not care. he is a very closed off guy. he would never indulge to much about what was going on with his dad or how he was doing, he doesnt open up to me about his feelings. when i received the text from him this morning it read. ” my dad died this morning. my family is starting to post it on face book so i wanted to tell you before you went to work and found out” (we live in a small town) i responded and told him that i was so sorry and that i was here for him. and that it hurt me to know that he is hurting. he responded thank you. So i guess what i feel at a lost at is. how can i be supportive? do i not text him until he texts me? do i not show at the funeral and give him a card of condolences? or do i show at the funeral and feel completely out of place and feel like a odd stranger at the back of the church in order to show him that im there and care? If i had to take a really good guess i would say he doesnt expect anything from me.  and i guess being that my feelings are more advanced i feel like its important for me to do the right thing.