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Chantel

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Viewing 7 posts - 1 through 7 (of 7 total)
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  • #325423
    Chantel
    Participant

    Thank You Valora and inky, margie, …

    anita.. sometimes your responses are hard to read. i know your trying to help but your very in your face . and idk if thats everyone’s cup of tea. But ill take it  because im desperate.  I know that letting him go has been the best because he hasn’t given me more. but the process  its hard its isnt about letting having someone have control over your emotions its about it hurting no matter what you do … its about hurt being about of your heart no matter how hard you try to push forward. I can choose him not be about of my day but my heart is still breaking. but biggest questions in who am i with out him? who am i without my kids… who am i when i stay home alone and have no one….. and why the fuck do i deserve to be alone when iv sacrificed  everything in life to be everything i should be to be better and a good mom.  why me??

    #325169
    Chantel
    Participant

    i think my biggest fear is being old and alone and never really being loved. I know this hurt stems from having daddy issues… god i hate saying that it sounds so pathetic. but i guess my need to be loved comes from being really close to my father at a young age and than he leaving and my parents divorcing and him creating his own life having another kid. i just recently came to terms with this. now im in the process of trying to not let me past pain control me anymore i want to be strong and “fixed” im just stumbling to find my path. iv heard of meditating but have no idea how to do it nor have money to join a class anywhere. so im going the motions the best way i can.

    #325159
    Chantel
    Participant

    thank you marge, What did you do to ease your emotions and feelings when you went through your break up? I really feel crazy at times like nothing calms me. i dont want to sound weak are crazy but its a awful feeling. i know i need to push forward but going through the process is not easy.

    #308131
    Chantel
    Participant

    Thank You Mark.

    Anita, I believe the “wow you’re losing a lot of weight” and “are you ok you look sick?” comments are because I was 30 pounds heavier on my anit-depressant pills and than had to get off of them and now I’m back to my normal weight. … I’m guessing that’s where it comes from any way. Believe me I stuff my face all the time and don’t gain a pound.

    #281053
    Chantel
    Participant

    Thank You Anita.

     

    Mark, That website link was very insightful. Thank You.

     

    Chantel.

    #225465
    Chantel
    Participant

    Thank you for your responses. I have a lot to think about…

    #225413
    Chantel
    Participant

    Here recently when I told him that I would be willing to untie my tubes the response that I got was that it would cost to much. As far as I know over the last 3 years he has been faithful … I have asked him if he is just keeping his options open and he tells me he has had options and has never taken those opportunities because that’s not what he wants. and that he is not a unfaithful person.

    As far as my kids go, he says hi to them and isn’t rude but try’s to come when they are not around because he says its not far to them to if he is around them but yet we don’t even no what is going to happen to us.

    I feel like it is just one excuse after another. Yes the whole kid thing is a big deal I understand that but he knew that three years ago. I don’t want to believe that he has used me because I whole heartily believe he has had other woman offer to be with him and if he really wanted he would had been gone a long time ago. is that dumb of me to think?

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