Kaylon,

It sounds like your father is very controlling, use to get his own way, and has this undercurrent of anger and judgment.

Good for your boyfriend for not answering your father about his financial situation for it is none of his business.  He was setting good boundaries.

Good that you are in therapy.  Walking away is another way of setting boundaries.  I would recommend you giving clear, direct and honest responses to either parent if they ask why you are not being a “sweet daughter.”

Good recognition that your boyfriend has nothing to do with how your parents behave, it is about them.  It could have been about your dog or job or a friend or the flavor of ice cream that you like.

This is the time in your life to individuate yourself and explore/discover who you are without the tethers of your parents.

Good luck,
Mark

Hi Kaylon,

They probably want you to call them all the time BECAUSE they only saw you a few times a year. It’s called guilt. And making up for lost time.

But let me tell you, even if they were the best parents in the world, your dad was out of line when he threw a tantrum when your boyfriend politely avoided his invasive questions.

Your parents will never approve of any boyfriend. It could be “race”, “money” or whatever. But the REAL reason is that it is proof that you are living your own life just fine without them.

I wouldn’t let your parents meet any future boyfriends. And elope if you get married. They won’t behave. Only bring your husband around them. He’ll be a done deal.

Best,

Inky