Hello Anita,

I was just wondering.. How could I make such a stupid decision. I am trapped. I cannot go out. I get up at 10/11 am. Eat breakfast, do some chores and I start work at 2PM. I never go out anymore. I don’t read books. I don’t watch movies. I don’t have time for it. I order shopping because I would not make it home on time. Why did I do this to myself. Why do I make such stupid decisions.

I feel hopeless.

Thank you. I will read the other post. Sorry I do not have notifications.

the morning positions will probably be not available.

I am having a really hard time right now. I was a fool. A believed a coworker who said his team was so much better, work is so great, people are so great.. turns out they are just a bunch of workaholics who get excited to get praised by management. They never get sick leave. They all gossip about one another. And they laugh at lame management’s jokes. I do not feel good here. I thought I would be respected here. That something meaningful is here. Truth is I cannot get along with anyone here. They are all nice to me but I am not as passionate about work as they are. We do not have anything in common. And I think it’s stupid how excited they are about getting a project.

And above all, I do not even have a lame company during my work hours, I work alone. No one to ask for help.

I thought it would be different. I thought people would be different, work would be better.

And my coworker from previous team, she was planning to leave so that’s why I decided to change jobs. Turns out she is still there and not looking like she would be leaving soon.

I am desperate. Why did I did this to myself. I am afraid there is no way out of this.

Anita,

I used to catastrophize too, like you do, seeing things way worse than they are.. I still have this tendency.

How did you overcome this? I feel like I am mentally ill. I cannot handle my emotions. They are too much.

this has to change, sitting in your room all day. Either you find a way to get out somehow, every day, or quit the job ASAP.

I’m thinking I will be getting up at 8 am, reading or watching something and then eating breakfast and going out for some time. A walk or shopping. But yesterday I couldn’t sleep, I think I was having a panic attack, my heart was racing. And today I am exhausted.

How about a few days break from the job for the rest of this week + weekend?

Maybe I will get some sick days or days off.

Thank you Anita. Funny thing at my working hours there is a person that does guided meditations.. at work! But I think I will choose listening to it on youtube and taking a walk.

I overcame my feeling that I was mentally ill and that my emotions were too much for me to manage (same as what you are struggling with)  through emotion regulation skills, another term is distress tolerance skills.

Sounds really comforting that you had the same emotions and it got better. Gives me hope.

I wish I could it overcome this.

okay, reading about this right now, Anita.

I found interesting article on assertiveness. There are some exercises and examples how to talk to people. I don’t know if I can do this.. I would like to. But I also feel exhausted. And I am trying since last year. I thought I changed so much already. Why is it so hard.