Gender and Personal Identity

New Reply

This topic has 7 replies, 5 voices, and was last updated 2 years, 1 month ago by Josh.

Viewing 7 posts - 1 through 7 (of 7 total)

Author

Posts
August 14, 2016 at 3:54 pm #112335

Janus
Participant

Also i find that i don’t like my parent’s limited views on the world as they seem prejudiced towards some religions and also some people and i am more open-minded. i find that i am the polar opposite of my family, mostly my mom and i don’t even want to look like her which is one of the reasons i sometimes question my gender identity and the thing is i don’t look like her b/c i’m more toned from working out. my family is quite mechanical minded while i have a creative spiritual side and love nature. i embrace people with different religions and ethnicities while my parents critique them. my mom has yin energy, while i’m more yang. i enjoy playing sports and casual clothes while she enjoys buying clothes, shopping, typical feminine things. i also enjoy letting out my anger in creative ways such as dancing or writing, while they often let their anger control them. i am easy to talk to and don’t judge others regardless of whoever they are while my parents will be a bit judgmental.

August 14, 2016 at 4:09 pm #112338

Vince
Participant

Hi Shirley,

I think what you have said is very interesting and not unusual at all for a young person trying to find their place in the world.

You are asking yourself a lot of questions and you don’t have the answers. But no one ever really does. The key is to identify what is important to you and follow what you are passionate about. Don’t worry so much about what you think is expected of you and what you think you should be.

August 14, 2016 at 4:45 pm #112340

Janus
Participant

Thanks, vince;)

August 14, 2016 at 5:20 pm #112342

Inky
Participant

Hi Shirley,

You’ll find when you enter college age that people become “cooler” about the very things you are talking about. And it’s OK to be athletic and wear casual clothes as a girl. We are not masculine, by the way. Athleticism and dressing casual is feminine BECAUSE we are females and are doing it!! Does that make sense? In the old days we would be called Tom Boys and that would be the end of it.

Best,

Inky

August 14, 2016 at 9:57 pm #112373

XenopusTex
Participant

There is nothing that says you cannot be a powerful person as a woman. There are women political leaders, scientists, CEO’s, etc. And, like men, some of them are great at what they do and others aren’t.

You probably wouldn’t find it easier as a “man” because you aren’t one.

For example: I went to law school with a woman who was about 4’10” and weighed about 75 pounds if you put a diving belt on her. Smart woman, did well in school, and the last I knew of her, she had a good job in the legal field. Would she have become more powerful trying to be a 4’10” 75 pound man?

Embrace what you are. People make comments about things all the time. People can be crude. It is not a problem with who you are, it is a problem with them.

January 12, 2023 at 1:25 pm #413672

Janus
Participant

wow seven years have passed since the last post on this thread🥺

In that span of time I’ve taken time to reassess my goals and myself. I love watching Dara Hoffman-Fox’s videos on “Asking a Gender Therapist. ” In my college years starting 2019 I started finding myself and letting go of trying to fit into the box of stereotypes. I joined the Transcendence group at Stockton and met some gender non-conforming people. I realized that I feel comfortable as a guy and spent time with a gender therapist over the years which has helped me build my self-love. I loved having Transcendence group people friends where I could be myself.

March 1, 2023 at 8:03 am #415945

Josh
Participant

Kudos to you in finding information, support, and continuing on your individual journey of self-discovery. It takes courage to be your authentic self, and to seek out people and situations where you feel welcome and comfortable. And remember, you have the capacity to be a great athlete and a smart person, at the same time!

I personally feel most empowered in my life when I am true to myself!

Happy to engage more… ~ Josh
Author

Posts