I’m so sick of it. She used to be my best friend. Now everything she says is so toxic. The thing is, she’s the person I’m closest to… so I don’t know if normal people act/think the way she does. I hope not. Because her words are so toxic.

I’ll give examples

1) I just had a conversation with her where she kept talking badly about this random girl. She was saying things like “I think she’s so ugly no offense. But she dated an attractive guy… he’s so out of her league” She was saying these mean things for about 30 minutes.

First of all, the negativity is just not healthy. Second, I’ve dated really attractive guys where other people would say they are out of my league. That killed me because they are essentially saying I’m not good enough when I put soooo much effort into my looks. Personally, I did not think that this guy was out of her league… so maybe my cousin was just jealous?

2) She always tells me I need a nose job

My nose isn’t the tiniest, most perfect nose but it’s not big either. I’ve mentioned this before, but I’ve put my nose into different golden ratio masks and it fits. So, to me, my nose isn’t big. I try to trust those calculators and masks because they are honest. But of course, some days I look in the mirror and my nose may look too big or something and I just get so depressed. Because it’s like “wow I look ugly today. Maybe that is what my cousin was talking about when she said I needed a nose job”

I’m honestly just sick of this and need help. I feel sometimes as though I’m going to have a panic attack after talking with her because she brings up the worst parts of my brain. Like right now my boyfriend called me right after I spoke with my cousin and I was about to cry. I’m so frustrated because she is supposed to be my best friend. And I leave our conversations feeling so UGLY because she doesn’t stop talking about how ugly other girls are… and she has also told me my nose is big…. which means she finds me ugly too?

Something important to note: I hate speaking about others’ looks but the truth is, every girl that my cousin talks about is better looking than her. I love my cousin, but she isn’t the best looking. She’s average… maybe even slightly below. Just to be honest. I hate to say something like this, but it’s true. So why does she talk negatively about girls who are better looking than she is? And no, I do not get the vibes that she is jealous. Maybe she was jealous of the girl mentioned above, but not every other girl. Everything she says about another girl (even sometimes guys) is negative. “She’s annoying, she’s stupid… but worst of all she’s UGLY” like whyyyy. Ugh I hate the way she speaks!!!! And how she can make me feel so depressed after talking to her for 30 minutes.

• This topic was modified 5 years, 4 months ago by Katie.