Hi Alpal,

I’m a “mere” housewife too, and some people just cannot wrap their heads around it. It helps that I have kids, so then it is more understandable. As you get older, you more become one of the oldest, if not the oldest, person in the room. It’s easier to stand in your power, in your acceptance, and in your decision when you’re 40.. 60.. 80.

If I were in your shoes (your mileage may vary) I would finish the degree just to shut everyone up and to have that in my back pocket.

I would also have kids if you want them (they also help “justify” staying at home).

Third, I would make it a home to be proud of, and invite everyone over for holidays. Use it as a meeting place. Do volunteer work. Be the Matriarch of your family, and the Queen of your neighborhood!

Keep your head up, sister! I live the dream and “get it”!

I had to respond to this post because I am in a very similar situation.
I am part towards getting my degree, but I feel so conflicted about it. I don’t like school, I feel miserable when I’m there, I dread it. What I truly want deep down inside is to be a homemaker and full-time mom, it’s what would make me most happy.
My family and in-laws do not approve, they want me to finish school and get a career; they tell me I’m “wasting myself” for wanting to be a housewife (this upsets me a lot- it’s such a insulting thing to say about all the housewives and homemakers out there!). My spouse supports and respects my choice, but family is very important to me and it tears me up inside to disappoint them and fight with them about this. On the other hand, school makes me miserable and I don’t want to go into some soul-crushing job that will just make me even more unhappy.
The main problem with me is money; getting my degree would pacify my family a little maybe (they’d still want me to get a career methinks) but tuition is just so expensive! I’m already way in debt, and every year I do the more in debt I become. Which means getting our own house and starting a family drifts further and further out of reach for us (my partner and I agreed that we don’t want to start a family till we have our own place and are financially stable).
I’m sorry that I don’t really have any advice for you, Alpal. I just wanted to reach out and say you’re not alone and I know how you feel right now.

Thanks Everyone.

Hi Alpal

I am sorry that you find yourself in this predicament. We should always do what makes us happy. Sometimes, we think that by following our short term dream is good enough and we forget about the long term happiness and evolving with times.

The most important questions that you need to ask yourself are: Who are you trying to convince ? What are the pros and cons of not finishing your degree or education while you are still young and vibrant ?

Always remember that life can change in a second and does change in seconds whether we like it or not. The only thing, which keeps us from drowning in sorrows is our ability to look after ourselves. If you are able to look after yourself today independent of others and until the day you die (in all aspects – socially, physically, financially, emotionally, spiritually) you are in good hands. Go and do whatever takes your fancy. However, if your answer is NO, then you need to do some serious soul searching. And no one can help you with this soul searching as everyone is on their own journey. Some people will agree with your decision and some will not but no one (including husband or father) can walk your path except for yourself.

Best wishes,

J

Thanks Alpal

You have to live your own life so if you keep worrying about what others will think, you will keep ruining your TODAY.

Lets make something very simple and clear for you. People are not negative. You attract what you are feeling inside. So if you are not wanting to associate with negative people, change your thought pattern. Start being kind to yourself and start radiating love and kindness. What we give out, we get back multi-fold. Give love, receive love. Give negativity, receive negativity. Give gossip and receive gossip. If you don’t believe me, trial it out. Nature and Universal laws are very simple. We make our lives complicated with our ignorance and arrogance. Learn to rise above this.

Online education is an excellent idea but then you are running away from the truth. You cant hide in your house and have a heaven like life with hubby. Eventually, you will have to face your fears, people and negativity. Until we learn our life lessons, life will keep throwing curve balls one after another. So why run ? Lets face whatever life has to hand to us. We can handle it, cant we ?

I am not sure which country you live in. If you google online courses, I am sure you will find something useful in your own country or around.

Think about it. Be kind to yourself woman !!!!!!

J