Dear Mina:

I want to put your recent two posts together with what you shared so far about yourself (I will boldface many of your words): you attended college and earned an engineering degree. You then had a few jobs but lost them. You got married twice but the first marriage ended in annulment and in the second, the husband demanded money. You were diagnosed with schizophrenia by one doctor, and with depression by another doctor. You’ve been on medications for 20 years. At one point, you did not have any schizophrenic episodes for 3 years. At about 30, you tried to leave your parents’ home, but their response was to take away your phone and put you in a rehabilitation center. You are now 40,  living with your parents. You are not working and therefore, you are financially dependent on your parents. Recently the medication dosage prescribed to you has increased and your mind has been going blank. You are obese (a side effect of the medication) with type 2 diabetes.

One or both of your parents abused you (“My mother used to put hot knife on my body“),  bribed your doctors, call you mad and stupid and say that if you go out, intelligent people will cheat you (ex. if you go shopping, people will charge more for fruits & vegetables), they neglected you (“My mom used to not give breakfast when I was growing up not even tea”), still criticize you (ex. how you dress), mock, tease and provoke you, misled you and are still misleading you, and your mother heavily controls you: she got you married twice to men you didn’t know, and wants to get you married again; she prevents you from going out for walks, or from leaving the house without an explanation to her. She prevents you from joining a class, like yoga; from having any hobby at home that costs money; from gardening, from studying and more. She refuses to give you money for a computer course and she won’t even give you pocket money.

You feel broken, scared, helpless, hopeless, lonely, scared, terrified, that nobody is on our side, and you find it difficult to trust people.

Is my summary accurate, Mina?

anita

Dear Mina:

In many countries there are programs to help people who are diagnosed with mental illnesses to live independently from their families (particularly when families are abusive to the person diagnosed with a mental illness), such as in group homes. Is there anything like that available to you?

anita

Dear Mina: is your home safe for you, and if so, in what ways is home safe?

anita