Posts tagged with “healing”

Highs and Lows Are Part of Growth and It All Makes Us Stronger
“Just like a muscle needs to tear to grow stronger, sometimes we need to wade into our own darkness to find a brighter light.” ~Lori Deschene
Sometimes we need to journey into the deepest, darkest, scariest, most painful places inside in order to reach the next level.
This is what happened to me earlier this year.
When I was younger, I was in an abusive relationship that created a lot of stories in my head. These stories became beliefs that I carried around for a long time. Beliefs like, âIâm not good enough,â âRelationships are painful,â âI donât …

What to Say (and Not to Say) to Someone Whoâs Grieving
“Remember that there is no magic wand that can take away the pain and grief. The best any of us can do is to be there and be supportive.” ~Marilyn Mendoza
My mother, an articulate and highly accomplished writer, began to lose much of what she valued a few years ago. Her eyesight was compromised by macular degeneration, her hallmark youthful vigor was replaced with exhaustion, and many of her friends began to die. Finally, and cruelest of all, her memory began to go, slowly at first, and then with increasing speed.
Her struggle and her suffering in the last …

How Creativity Heals Us and Why Itâs a Gift to the World
âCreativity is the way I share my soul with the world.â ~BrenĂ© Brown
I wrote a poem today for the woman I love(d).
Just a few weeks ago, I fully believed she was the one Iâd be with forever. Love forever. My heart was open so deep and wide to her. We talked about marriage and living together in the woods, making art, and being a family.
Then things got tough. We talked, we tried, we read books, jetted our intention out into the universe. But we just couldnât keep it together.
There was so much pain. But also …

Making the Hurt Visible: How I Stopped Hating the Man and Learned to Listen to Myself
âIgnoring isn’t the same as ignorance, you have to work at it.â ~Margaret Atwood, The Handmaidâs Tale
Weâve just passed the year anniversary of an event that has greatly changed our country. The shock of the election results last year sent waves of powerful emotions rippling through our nation.
Personally, I felt the effects as intense and immediate grief. It was as though I had just lost my dearest companion.
I had days of shock, despair, feelings of intense cold with physical shaking and episodes of vomiting and nausea, followed by weeks of sleepless nights, spontaneous sweating, nightmares …

Breaking the Chains of Victimhood When You’ve Been Abused
âToxically shamed people tend to become more and more stagnant as life goes on. They live in a guarded, secretive, and defensive way. They try to be more than human (perfect and controlling) or less than human (losing interest in life or stagnated in some addictive behavior).â ~John Bradshaw- Healing the Shame That Binds You
Do you feel like a victim? Are those around you suggesting that you are acting like a victim? Are these same people telling you to get over it and move on? Do these judgments and statements feel harmful or helpful for you?
Most people making …

Lost Everything? 8 Tips to Help You Get Back on Your Feet
“Tough times never last, but tough people do.” ~Robert H. Schuller
About two years ago, I was working in a professional career that I had been building for nearly twenty years.
I had been at my company for thirteen years, and had been generally commended and given positive reviews and regular bonuses and raises for most of that time.
I had just left a terrible and traumatic relationship, and due to two years of criticism, gaslighting, and conflict, was experiencing severe depression. I was on medication that made it hard for me to focus and which gave me anxiety …

The Best Things in Life Are Free (and Healing)
âThe six best doctors: sunshine, water, rest, air, exercise, and diet.â ~Wayne Fields
Iâve always believed the best things in life are free. Sunshine on your skin next to a body of water ranks up there as one of my favorite experiences. I love nothing more than to be in a pool in the summertime.
Though doctors have helped me with my depression, nature has provided me with my best doctors. When I’m in nature, I feel restored.
When I was a child, I used to like to go on adventures. I would venture off into my parentsâ backyard …

Dealing with Bullies: How to Cope When People Are Cruel
âHow people treat you is their karma; how you react is yours.â ~Dr. Wayne Dyer
I was the quintessential late-bloomer, not hitting my growth spurt until my junior year of high school. Iâm six feet tall now, but for all of middle school and the first half of high school, I was one of the shortest kids in the entire school.
Additionally, some thought I had a slight lisp. I was extremely self-conscious about it after a few people unkindly pointed it out to me. During my senior year I wore Invisalign braces, which corrected my teeth and improved by …

Love Hurts: Buddhist Advice for the Heartbroken – Interview and Book Giveaway
Note – The winners for this giveaway have been chosen. They are:
- Jennifer Moore Hardesty
- Margie Lynn
- Dr. Mac
- Ryan
- RB
- Justme
- Rogério Cardoso
- Fernanda Garza
- Benjamin E. Nichols
- Terri Cross
When youâre dealing with heartbreak, it can feel like the pain will never go away.
You may know, intellectually, that everything heals with time, but in that moment, when youâre suffering, itâs hard to hold onto hope.
Like all humans, Iâve experienced my fair share of loss, and Iâve felt scared, depressed, alone, betrayed, rejected, regretful, and angryâwith other people, with myself, and with the world.
Losing someone or …

Forgiveness Isn’t Weakness – Don’t Let Anger Hold You Back and Weigh You Down
âThe weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is an attribute of the strong.â ~Gandhi
For many years forgiveness was not in my mind, let alone my vocabulary. I was taught to believe that forgiveness was a sign of weakness, and I certainly did not forgive anyone who hurt me.
In the past, I have engaged in acts of revenge, which I thought was the right thing to do at those times. I was wrong.
One event that springs to my mind was when I was the target of a cruel prank. A group of guys had taunted a young man …

Healing from Childhood Abuse: Get Help and Take Your Life Back
TRIGGER WARNING:Â This post deals with an account of sexual abuse and may be triggering to some people.
“No one loses their innocence. It is either taken or given away willingly.” ~Tiffany Madison
Childhood innocence. When I think of it I always picture a baby lying on their back, playing with their feet. They are laughing, cooing, smiling, and lost in a sense of wonder. Full of joy, love, curiosity, and awe. When you look at them you can’t help but smile, and their joy and laughter are infectious. At this moment, they are perfect.
Now have all that taken …

Surviving Loss: You Always Have Choice
âI am not a product of my circumstances. I am a product of my decisions.â ~Stephen Covey
One ordinary night after an ordinary day of work and family, I went to bed a mother, wife, teacher, writer-person.
I remember falling asleep between sentences exchanged with my husband after an evening spent with just the two of us on our patio, something we rarely seemed to find the time to do in our busy lives. We promised each other that weâd make a concerted effort to have more of these âdates.â
The next morning, on what was supposed to be another …

Why I Forgave My Cruel, Abusive Father
âIt’s not an easy journey, to get to a place where you forgive people. But it is such a powerful place, because it sets you free.â ~Tyler Perry
I still remember the day when I told my mother that I no longer wanted to be at home. Iâd had enough of so much pain and sorrow, and the constant yelling. Soon after, I watched my mother cry bitterly as she made the decision to get a divorce.
I was ten years old at the time.
My father had always been a very strict man, who used to believe that …

To Fully Heal Your Broken Heart, Make Sure You Do This
âGrief is healthy and it is healing.â ~Richard Moss
When I was a little girl there was this belief floating around in my head that there was only one person. One person who was my soulmate. One person who could love me. I think the belief was formed by some concoction of Disney movies, religion, and American culture.
Whatâs worse than this belief is that I somehow found myself afraid that I wouldnât even have one person. I was afraid I would be alone. Forever.
I donât know when I adopted the belief that I wasnât enough, that I …

Healing from Depression: It Begins With Asking for Help
“I speak of a clinical depression that is the background of your entire life, a background of anguish and anxiety, a sense that nothing goes well, that pleasure is unavailable and all your strategies collapse.” ~Leonard Cohen
Right before my eighteenth birthday, when I was about to go to university, I was hit by a car and sustained multiple fractures to my right leg. This led to a couple of operations and the best part of ten months with me unable to walk.
While all of my school friends and peers were having the time of their lives in …

Coping with Suicide Loss: 9 Lessons for Hope and Healing
âIt takes courage to endure the sharp pains of self-discovery rather than choose to take the dull pain of unconsciousness that would last the rest of our lives.â ~Marianne Williamson
âThat boy is one in a million, Jill. Heâs one in a million.â
These were my grandfatherâs words to my mum about my brother, Mitch, when he was just a kid. He really was one in a millionâa light that shone so bright as a child and early teen, only to then fade into shadows of desperation and defeat as he grew into adulthood.
No one really knows whatâs going …