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Posts tagged with “goals”

Why Iā€™m Done Standing on the Sidelines of Life

ā€œIf you spend too much time thinking about a thing, you’ll never get it done. Make at least one definite move daily toward your goal.ā€ ~Bruce Lee

Itā€™s easy to criticize others.

Itā€™s easier to sit outside a situation than be in it.

Ironically, itā€™s easy to belittle someone elseā€™s efforts without making any real effort ourselves.

The safe side of the ropes is an easier choice than committing to being in the ring, truly baring something. Itā€™s also a softer option.

Itā€™s much harder to have skin in the game.

It takes guts, and a healthy degree of get …

Fellow Dreamers: If You Feel Like a Fool, Youā€™re on the Right Track

“Move out of your comfort zone. You can only grow if you are willing to feel awkward and uncomfortable when you try something new.” ~Brian Tracy

Iā€™m a fool.

Well, itā€™s more accurate to say Iā€™ve been a fool often, and Iā€™m ashamed.

My life, no different from many, has had some successes but also many setbacks and outright failures. I suppose this is just another way of saying Iā€™ve lived.

The problem is that Iā€™ve allowed my mistakes, errors, and failures to hold me back.

Weā€™ve all felt like a fool before, but when has doing so made it …

Slow, Imperfect Progress Is Better Than None at All

“When perfectionism is driving, shame is riding shotgun, and fear is that annoying backseat driver.” BrenĆ© Brown

Sometimes I feel like the girl who cried film.

I first wrote a blog post introducing Tiny Buddha Productions three years ago, and despite my earnestness, passion, and enthusiasm, I have only one short film to show for myself.

When I was working on this short, which we filmed partly in my apartmentā€”in my bedroom, amid the worn clothes and shoes in my walk-in closet evenā€”I felt more alive and aligned than Iā€™d felt in years.

I was doing something Iā€™d wanted to …

How Lowering Our Expectations Helps Us Do What We Really Want to Do

ā€œHuman beings can alter their lives by altering their attitudes of mind.ā€ ~William James

Despite being the sort of person whoā€™s constantly generating self-improvement to-do lists, Iā€™ve never been big into making New Yearā€™s resolutions. If I make any at all, they usually occur as an afterthought, frequently after the fact, and without much in the way of any real resolution.

However, this January I suddenly decided my resolution for 2019 should be to lower my expectations.

My whole life Iā€™ve been an overachieving, Type A perfectionist. The sort of person who obsessively stresses about getting work in on time, …

Why Having Your Sh*t Together Is Overrated (and Misunderstood)

“Itā€™s not about time, itā€™s about choices. How are you spending your choices?” ~Beverly Adamo

Hi, my nameā€™s Tash. Iā€™m twenty-six years old and soon Iā€™ll be living in a van.

My sister is twenty-three. She owns her own flat, which she shares with her long-term boyfriend and their pet tortoise. She has a well-paid job that she enjoys, and she even has a company car. For some people, this might look like sheā€™s really got her sh*t togetherā€”sheā€™s ticking all the right boxes!

And donā€™t get me wrong, Iā€™m not saying she isnā€™t! Iā€™m very happy for her and …

How Recovering People-Pleasers Can Discover What They Really Want

ā€œWhen you say ‘yes’ to others, make sure you’re not saying ‘no’ to yourself.ā€ ~Paulo Coelho

People-pleasers regularly subvert their own needs for the needs of others. We spend years saying ā€œyesā€ when we mean ā€œno,ā€ signing up for commitments weā€™d rather avoid, and occupying our minds with othersā€™ desires.

When we finally clear out the clutter to put ourselves first, we look around at the empty space, bewildered, with endless questions. What do we want? What does true happiness look like for us? What would a life lived on our own terms be like?

For me, these questions once …

Why I Focus on the Now Instead of What I Want for the Future

ā€œThe next message you need is always right where you are.ā€ ~Ram Dass

I want you to go back to New Yearā€™s Day 2009 with me for a second. Iā€™d recently left a job and was embarking upon a new career, one in which I was self-employed.

I pulled out all the stops and created a vision board that contained all of the things: how much money I wanted to earn, how I wanted to dress, where I wanted to vacation, how I wanted to eat, and everything else I could think of. I thought if I created this …

Why Remembering Youā€™re Going to Die Is the Best Motivator

ā€œDonā€™t be afraid of death; be afraid of an unlived life. You donā€™t have to live forever; you just have to live.ā€ ~Natalie Babitt

Once a month, I visit the local cemetery and walk around. Iā€™m not there to visit anyone in particular. Iā€™m there to remind myself of my own mortality.

And it always wakes me up.

I soak in the energy: I read the simple legacies on the tombstones, from young children to those who made it to 100 years old. Iā€™m not morose. Iā€™m not negative. Iā€™ve simply found the greatest motivational tool in the world, and …

Lifeā€™s Too Short to Be Too Busy: How to Make the Most of Your Time

ā€œSlow down. Calm down. Donā€™t worry. Donā€™t hurry. Trust the process.ā€ ~Alexandra Stoddard

Ā Heard in the offices across America…

ā€œIā€™m so busy and have no time!ā€

ā€œHow is it almost 2019 already?!ā€

ā€œIā€™ll sleep when Iā€™m dead…ā€

Weā€™re so focused on the next deadline, getting the next promotion, having the approval of our managers and peers alike that we push, push, push all the time.

Oh, how I can relate! I worked in corporate America commuting into NYC (two hours each way!) as the VP of marketing at a major media company. And I worked… a lot.

When I

The Danger of Wishful Thinking: Nothing Changes If We Donā€™t Take Action

ā€œYou just have to determine to settle for nothing less than being fully alive, to show up, be who you are, and share your gifts.ā€ ~Gabrielle Roth

A few years ago for the winter solstice my womenā€™s group got together, as we do every week, and held a beautiful ritual to welcome both the darkness and the light. We released what we were ready to let go of in our lives and set our intentions for the New Year. We not only spoke our intentions, we danced them for each other. It was beautiful and powerful.

But a few days …

When You Keep Giving Up on New Habits That Are Good for You

“If you have a bad day, remember that tomorrow is a wonderful gift and a new chance to try again.ā€ ~Bryant McGill

As I crawled back into bed after hitting the snooze button, my eyes heavy with sleep, I told myself, ā€œYou gave up once moreā€ and rolled over back to sleep, annoyed with myself.

Two months earlier, inspired by the book The Miracle Morning, by Hal Erold, I had taken the habit of getting up early (around 5am) every day to meditate for fifteen minutes, write for thirty minutes, and exercise for thirty minutes.

When I started the …

Why I Wonā€™t Let the Fear of Failure Hold Me Back

ā€œSuccess is not final, failure is not fatal; it is the courage to continue that counts.ā€ ~Winston Churchill

I am scared of sharks. Often when Iā€™m floating in the ocean on my surfboard, amazed at the vastness before me and my relative smallness in the world, my mind drifts toward what may be lurking below.

I know that I am more likely to get injured during the car ride to the beach or get struck by lightning when I get there than be attacked by a shark. I also know that, according to the US Consumer Product Safety Commission …

How Micro Habits Can Help You Reach Big Goals

“A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.” ~Lao Tzu

Many of us have big, grand goals for our lives.

These goals can be tied to our work, or maybe starting a family, or ideals for a new home with that family, or travel to an exotic location weā€™ve long dreamed about, or pretty much anything else. Oftentimes these goals can seem a very long way from where we are presently in our lives. In fact, sometimes they can seem so far away that they appear to be totally out of reach.

As a consequence, too …

The Shy Person’s Guide to Making Your Dreams a Reality

ā€œOur deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.ā€ ~Marianne Williamson

Light poured into the studio. We sat in a circle on the hardwood floor. We did some deep breathing and then the facilitator asked us to think about what we really wanted and didnā€™t have yet. She instructed us to speak it out loud in the present tense, as if it were already happening.

I was at a co-working space in downtown Toronto, and this was the daily opening where we set our intentions for the day and sometimes …

We All Need to Define “Success” for Ourselves

ā€œThereā€™s no such thing as what you ā€˜shouldā€™ be doing with your life.ā€ ā€“Lori Deschene

How often have you thought about what success means to you?

If youā€™re anything like my younger self, that would be almost never. Itā€™s not that I didnā€™t want to be successful. Itā€™s just that it wasnā€™t something Iā€™d given much thought to. No one ever asked me about it or even encouraged me to think about success. Iā€™d just absorbed it from the people and culture around me, watching how they lived and what was important to them.

From what I saw around …

What Really Makes Us Feel Successful

“Congratulations on becoming successful and best wishes on becoming happy.” ~John Mayer

I was living the life of my dreams.

Or so I thought.

Iā€™ve been very fortunate to have had some very awesome opportunities all over the world.

Iā€™ve worked to help victims of human trafficking in the shady streets of Thailand, Iā€™ve helped build a positive community with drug traffickers in the extremely violent favelas of Brazil, and Iā€™ve cared for terminally ill patients who were picked up from the streets die with dignity at Mother Theresaā€™s famous House of the Dying in India.

I also got …

You Arenā€™t Stuck in Life: Commit to Change and Get Started

“The secret of getting ahead is getting started.” ~Mark Twain

We all have big dreams, big goals, and big ideas on what we think our life should look like, or how we think life will end up.

Some of us meticulously plan out our lives, envisioning and letting ourselves daydream as we think about all the stuff weā€™d love to accomplish. Iā€™d wager that our plans include some pretty big things in life that would make us feel pretty proud.

The problem is, a lot of us have trouble reaching the potential weā€™ve set for ourselves. Time kind of …

Maybe This Is What Happiness Is

With a lift of his chin and a bit of a grin,
Without any doubting or quiddit,
He started to sing as tackled the thing
That couldnā€™t be done and he did it.

ā€”Edgar Guest

Iā€™ve always believed in the adage ā€œactions speak louder than words.ā€ Iā€™ve never been one to seek guidance from commercial catch phrases, trending tweets, or song lyrics. But Guestā€™s poem did make me smile. Whether it was the playfulness of the verse or just the simplicity of the message, it spoke volumes to me.

Easy, right? Well, maybe for Edgar, but not so much …

Itā€™s Okay to ā€˜Failā€™ on Your Way to Finding What You Want to Do

ā€œLife isnā€™t about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.ā€ ~George Bernard Shaw

I would say itā€™s a safe assumption that most people arenā€™t quite sure what theyā€™re doing.

What do I mean? I mean that most individualsā€”whether they look polished and presentable or haphazardly have their life thrown togetherā€”are generally playing a game called ā€œlife.ā€ And theyā€™re trying the best they can.

In other words, weā€™re all capable and have all experienced the highs and lows of what life has to offer. Unfortunately, thatā€™s just part of the human experience. To try to ride the highs while avoiding the …

How to Pick Your Best Idea (Especially If You Suffer from Idea Overload!)

“It’s not about ideas. It’s about making ideas happen.” ~Scott Belsky

In virtually every human pursuit, from personal growth to the arts to business, ideas and the execution of those ideas is what drives us forward.

And when it comes to ideas, there are basically two kinds of people:

  • Those who struggle to come up with what feels like good ideas
  • Those gifted with a ton of ideas, but who struggle to pick the right idea to pursue

And because struggling stinks, the good news is that no matter which of these two camps youā€™re from, what follows can help …