Dear Arden

In that one short paragraph you have managed to raise several age on conundrums.

Here are some possible answers to ponder on

Not looking for others to validate ourselves

We are urged to give without expecting anything in return and to let go ownership of the gift.

All beings want happiness and freedom from suffering.

Over countless lifetimes we have been & done allthings, accumulating & feeling the effects of  karma as we go

Dear Miyoid

You are right the only person we have direct power over is ourselves, but this does not stop us wishing the best outcome for others.

Many years ago I read a book by Valerie Mason John “Detox your Heart” I and others in our group have found it insightful.

I have never come across the phrase streaks in conjunction with Yoga. I would be grateful if you could explain it.

Best wishes

Roberta

Dear Adam

Thank you for posting your update.

You have come so far and I am glad that you are persevering with your own healing and are realistic about amount of effort & timescale it can take.

All the best Roberta

Dear Henry

Firstly of all there is no one answer that fits all.

Be clear why you are considering daycare. Work, financial pressure etc or is it to give your daughter a social life or there can be more than 1 reason why.

Where we live we have a babes & bumps and mother & toddler groups which connect parents &  their young with others in the same situation. This is affordable as the parent is responsible for their child during the sessions and helps with socialization of the children and also helps parents from feeling isolated and unsupported.

Some daycare units are based on specific ethos such as Steiner, Montessori , Forest Schools so research what is available in your area.

best wishes

Dear Seaturtle

No-one person can fulfill all our different needs all of the time & even if they could they would probably not want to be with us!

I have been in relationships where having a spiritual life was important and they still fizzled out romantically ( but we are still very good friends).

Although I have taken a vow of celibacy I also have the vow “May I have integrity in all my relationships” basically anyone I encounter (physically & electronically etc) comes under this heading.

I know I am fortunate that I have a varied set of friends, each contribute in their own different ways to our relationship, that way none of us become a burden and we support ourselves, each other and other people.

I hope that your spiritual journey will improve all areas of your life.

regards Roberta

Dear Kodi

I am glad that you do occasionally have access to a sanctuary. Now the trick is to create something similar at home, a sacred space can be as small as a niche on a bookshelf or as big as your own retreat hut in the garden. A person I know found the only place she could get away to was the toilet but she managed to put in a shelf that served as a mini altar.

During lockdown I shared accommodation with my son & family i was suprised how quick they all got used to me doing my practices and my young grandson understands that “Buddha time” means that if he is in my space he sits quietly or he waits patiently else where for me to come and play with him when I & others are finished.

I have never come across Hystamine intolerance what does that entail? One of my previous co workers had a reaction to bee products and it was amazing how many everyday items fell into this bracket.

I wish you all the best in finding a peaceful & fulfilling life

Dear Kodi

All beings want happiness and the freedom from suffering is the fundamental Buddhist teaching and the 8 fold path is the journey we can take to get us there.  The Aryuvedic system of medicine looks at the person as a whole and seeks to balance our systems that is in harmony with our dosha stlye.

I wonder what kinds of narrative runs thru your conscious and do you believe everything you think?

If possible can you expound what a horrible person feels like to you ie heavy hot tight.

Adding guilt about the things that are good in your life is like drinking poison, where as, appreciation is like ingesting a  healthy tonic. it is your choice which bottle you choose to drink from, as you become more mindful of things moment to moment seeing that you do have choice will be easier to see & that in itself is empowering.

So I am guessing that an introverted empath needs to be around quieter, gentler,  joyful people and a slower more natural lifestyle to help them flourish?

Dear Tey

I am sorry that you feel stuck.  Yes homesickness & nostalgia are pulling at your heartstrings at the moment along side what seems a lack of motivation from your husband.  I guess some open dialogue needs to happen between you, about both of yours  hopes,  dreams & fears and how you want to grow & nurture the relationship etc. Does your husband suffer from depression or low self esteem or illness? You do not mention your ages. Also many relationships go into the doldrums at about this time span that why its called the 7 year itch.

Also try to see other options not just the two  stay because I love him or go and enjoy life  surely there is a way to find some joy in Missouri. I think Ghandi said be the change you want to see and maybe encourage baby steps forward with your husband even if it is just to sit out side and share a cup of coffee rather than a 10 mile hike,  taking joy and appreciation in the small things help rather than putting one’s happiness in just the big things.