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If You Think There’s Something Wrong with You


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The root cause of suffering for many of us is believing that there’s something’s wrong with us. Psychiatrists’ and therapists’ offices are filled with people who are carrying this false belief, most often stemming from traumatic or painful childhood experiences, or even people telling us this directly.

Sometimes we inferred this idea because we were treated badly as children and/or we didn’t get our physical or emotional needs met. Perhaps we were called selfish or bad because we “asked for too much,” or we were told we couldn’t have what we wanted because we didn’t “earn or deserve it.”

Maybe …

How to Get Out of Your Head and Show Up for Your Life

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“If you think there’s something missing from your life, it’s probably you.” ~Robert Holden

Most people would agree that thinking too much can cost you your peace, your happiness perhaps—but your life? Surely that’s a bit of an exaggeration.

I’ll explain with a story.

I remember taking my daughter to the park one day when she was around three years old. Like all kids of that age, she was thrilled and mesmerised by her surroundings—the insect crawling up the blade of grass, the ducks squawking in the pond, the dog chasing the frisbee nearby.

She was fully engaged with the …

7 Morning Mindfulness Practices to Help You Have an Awesome Day

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How often do you feel energized, grounded, and excited for the day when you finish your morning routine?

And what is your morning routine?

Are you one of those people who sleep as late as possible, pound some coffee and a processed breakfast, and then rush to get into work on time? (No judgment—I’ve been there! Gas station java and pop tarts for the win!)

Or do you leave yourself a cushion of time so you can ease into your day feeling centered and invigorated, through some combination of self-care activities?

In recent years I’ve leaned toward the latter because …

Giveaway: Win Tiny Buddha’s Mindfulness Kit for You and a Loved One!

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UPDATE: The winner for this giveaway, chosen at random, is: Beth Gallager

Please contact me at email@tinybuddha.com with your address so I can send you your kits! I wish I could send a kit to everyone who commented, but since I can’t, I’m extending this offer here.

There’s no denying it’s a strange holiday season this year. Annual traditions are on hold for many. Loved ones are far away. And I imagine most of us are getting antsy for a return to some semblance of normal.

While a lot feels different this year, there’s one thing that remains the …

How to Create Peace and Calm Through Mindful Photography

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“Don’t shoot what it looks like, shoot what it feels like.” ~David Alan Harvey

Due to the current state of the world, I think it could benefit of us all to be more in the here and now, in the present, where it’s easier to find peace and calm. Or even to just be more mindful, so to speak, in what we say, do, and think, since it’s tempting to lash out at others and focus on the negative during hard times. How we act, interact, and even plan forward are more vital to our mental and physical health …

3 Ways Decluttering Can Help You Accept Yourself

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“I now see how owning our story and loving ourselves through that process is the bravest thing that we will ever do.” ~BrenĂ© Brown

I had just squeezed all my possessions into a jumbo-sized moving van and relocated to a teeny tiny apartment. I had landed a new job in a new city, and everything seemed peachy keen
 at least, on the surface.

It was a fresh spring evening in 2015, and I’d spent the entire day trying to fit all my clutter into my new home. Picture this: my 350-square-foot attic had sloped ceilings, the world’s smallest kitchen, and …

How to Tame Your ‘Tornado’ Mind and Stop Overthinking Everything

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“You don’t suffer because you have thoughts. You suffer because you judge them, resist them, believe them, wallow in them, or identify with them.” ~Unknown

At one point in my life, I wondered, “Will things always be this way?”

So rushed, with barely a moment to call my own. Current events swirling around, reflecting the worst side of humanity. Lost under the weight of my to-do lists, financial worries, and deadlines.

I barely knew where my thoughts stopped and I started. Would I always be this anxious, irritated, distracted, and isolated from those around me? Even from loved ones?…

Beating the Odds: Why I Survived and My Brother Did Not

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My brother, Marc-Emile, sparkled brilliantly. At sixteen years old, he could expound on physics or Plato, calculus, or car mechanics, Stravinsky or Steppenwolf. At seventeen, he began reading the Great Books series, starting with Homer and Aeschylus and moving forward through the Greeks. I don’t know how many of those Great Books he read. He didn’t have that long.

My brother had everything going for him. He was kind, ethical, and handsome. He graduated high school a year early, at the top of his class, with virtually perfect SATs. He started at MIT as a physics major. He ended at …

When You’re Confused About What to Do: How to Find Clarity

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“Nothing in the world can bother you as much as your own mind, I tell you. In fact, others seem to be bothering you, but it is not others, it is your own mind.” ~Sri Sri Ravi Shankar

Do you ever feel confused about what to do and unsure about how to find clarity?

Maybe an unforeseen event, like a layoff or breakup, knocked you into a mental spin. Or perhaps you’re muddling along, with no clue where you’re going.

Confusion can leave you helpless, indecisive, and afraid. And not knowing what to do only adds to your …

How to Stop Obsessing Over What Other People Think of You

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“You wouldn’t worry so much about what others think of you if you realized how seldom they do.” ~Eleanor Roosevelt

I spent way too much of my life worrying about what other people were thinking of me.

I couldn’t walk down the street without sucking in my gut for fear a stranger might have thought I looked fat (mind you, I did this even when I weighed 120 pounds!!)

Going to any social gathering—a Halloween party, networking event, craft fair, even a holiday family meal—was so stressful it felt like I had a bees’ nest in my chest.

I …

Tiny Buddha’s New Mindfulness Kit: Less Stress, More Peace

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Hi friends!

I couldn’t be more excited to share that I’ve officially launched a Mindfulness Kit that includes a daily mindfulness practice guide and four aromatherapy-based products, as well as three free digital bonuses that expand on a few of the practices in the guide.

Why This Kit—with Aromatherapy Products?

Over the years I’ve written five books and launched and eCourse, but this time I adamantly wanted to create and offer something completely different.

As a writer, I’m often in my head. Most of us are—always reading articles, emails, and social media posts that reflect people’s varied thoughts and opinions. …

How to Stop Over-Apologizing, From a Lifelong Over-Apologizer

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“Forgive yourself for not knowing what you didn’t know before you lived through it. Honor your path. Trust your journey. Learn, grow, evolve, become.” ~Creig Crippen

When I was a child, my immediate reaction to most things was “I’m sorry.”

Had to miss class because of a field trip for a different class? I’m sorry.

Something bad happened to someone I knew? I’m sorry.

It didn’t matter what the situation was or if I directly caused it or even if I was involved in it in any way whatsoever. Even in the best of situations, strangely, I’d figure out …

14 Daily Happiness Habits to Adopt Right Now

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“The biggest lie we’re told is ‘Be with someone who makes you happy.’ The truth is, happiness is something you create on your own. Be with someone who adds to it.” ~Unknown

That’s what we all strive for, right?

Happiness, I mean.

I used to think that happiness was about my external world. If things were going well for me (in my career, social life, relationships, etc.), then I was happy. If things weren’t going well, which things often weren’t in one area or another, I felt frustrated, angry, or defeated.

Later, I realized that long-term happiness isn’t about …

How to Set Healthy Boundaries and Protect Your Space and Energy

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“You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection.” ~Buddha

This unprecedented time has given us an opportunity to pause, reflect, and focus on the things that are truly important in our lives. As an unexpected benefit, the need for social distancing has provided many of us with much needed personal boundaries.

I grew up at time when children were seen and not heard, but we were never encouraged to have personal boundaries. We had no privacy, and there was a lack of understanding for the need for alone time. It reminds me …

How to Make Sense of the Anxiety That Comes with Being a Parent

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“You must first teach a child he is loved. Only then is he ready to learn everything else.” ~Amanda Morgan

If I had a nickel for every parent who asked me, “So, if we do (
insert a strategy they have been given
), can we know for sure that he won’t have to deal with (
insert list of problems here 
) when he grows up?”

Sadly, there are no nickels for hearing the question, nor guarantees to offer anxious parent. In fact, parental anxiety exists largely because life has no guarantees.

Nevertheless, the question in itself is worth considering.

So let’s …

How I Found the Courage to Leave an Abusive Relationship

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“Do something today that your future self will thank you for.” ~Unknown

My whole life has been filled with toxic and abusive relationships, starting with extreme physical and emotional abuse from my parents, right up to the last relationship that I left in 2013. Abuse—physical, sexual, emotional, and verbal—is all I’ve ever known.

My entire life. I knew it wasn’t normal.

I desperately wanted to be loved, appreciated, and respected. I desperately wanted ‘normal,’ whatever that was. I longed for a fairy tale romance. I longed for happiness and peace. I just wasn’t convinced I would ever have that.

And …

Dear Estranged Adult: You Are Strong and Worthy of Love

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Dear estranged adult,

What I want you to remember is that it was never really about you, although it might have felt like it at the time and it might feel that way now.

When your parents told you over and over you weren’t good enough, that you would never amount to anything, they were just projecting their own feeling about themselves on to you because deep down, they do not feel they are good enough and don’t believe they have amounted to anything.

Maybe these feelings were passed down from their parents, or maybe your parents have regrets about …

6 Simple Acts to Make the World a Better Place

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“The great use of life is to spend it for something that will outlast it.” ~William James

I’ll never forget the call.

It was 1989 and, like most college students, I spent winter break in Florida looking for some sun. Stepping off the airplane and being greeted by a burst of warm air was the best. As I entered the terminal, I had the added benefit of being greeted by my maternal grandparents, who lived in North Miami Beach.

Lounging at the pool, going on walks with them, or eating out, the experience was a wonderful way to decompress after …

Healing from Abuse and Reclaiming My Dreams

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TRIGGER WARNING: This post mentions sexual abuse and may be triggering to some people.

“Along the way I stopped into a coffee shop. All around me normal, everyday city types were going about their normal, everyday affairs
In spite of which—or, rather, all the more because— here I was, sitting in this coffee shop, drinking my coffee, feeling a desperate loneliness. I alone was the outsider. I had no place here
 Here I had no ties to anyone. Fact is, I’d come to reclaim myself.” ~Haruki Murakami

“You don’t have any goals.”

“I wondered why someone your age and …

Instead of Fearing Change, Get Excited About Progress

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“Progress is impossible without change.” ~Walt Disney

I want you to look in the mirror and tell me what you see.

Do you look older? Does your skin have more wrinkles? Do you notice dark circles around your eyes or white hair on your head?

You are looking at massive changes from a decade ago. A lot of it you probably don’t like—changes due to your body growing older. Changes that you cannot resist.

Now look in the mirror again. Do you notice a more confident person? Someone who is self-assured, optimistic, and happy in life?

It happened to me …