Home→Forums→Tough Times→Opened my mouth; relationship ended and now most definitely job as well
- This topic has 3 replies, 3 voices, and was last updated 1 week, 5 days ago by
anita.
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May 5, 2026 at 4:23 am #457636
AlecseeParticipantWhen I wasnt contacted by my avoidant ex, I opened my mouth and got shut down. I was still hot headed from those days and then around Nov, I had my evaluation and I didnt like the language used it in. I challenged it because i took it personal, managament thought I wanted a raise and it was decided for me to enter a PIP program. I did not think this would result from this. It was stressful, I was relieved of some duties and on probation again. I couldnt handle the stress, I was miserable and eventually it made me insecure a bit and thought I needed a recharge during the PIP, I ran out of time because my supervisor took a lot of additional time off in part. All in all I did improve as an employee but my supervisor only wrote negative critisism but did not complete my main objective, the handbook (about 80% was completed). My supervisor assured me that it would be okay and that they recommend me to get more training with my new supervisor but the review was negative. The Plant manager decided termination. I am gonna have a union representative and a chance to defend myself but this is a huge blow because I felt i did improve in motivation wise and just self starting to do more tasks around the facility. I have been accepting of more things currently but I did want to get vested at 5 years at least and I was only at the halfway mark. I ti hink in the coming days, I have been better at not looking to deep into the past but my brain might wander. Especially when I think that the job was heading into the direction I wanted to have schedule wise :/
May 5, 2026 at 9:59 am #457650
anitaParticipantHello Alecsee 🙂
I had to look up PIP: Performance Improvement Plan. I am sorry that you got terminated 😕
The whole process you described sounds incredibly stressful. You did well surviving it 👏
Learning what you can learn from the experience at work, however painful (as well as from the relationship with your ex), is very important in my mind because-
For me, learning and adjusting my attitudes and behaviors according to what I learn ( however difficult) makes me feel better, stronger, more capable.
You opened your post with saying you opened your mouth and got shut down by your ex, right?
What happened?
🤔 Anita
May 5, 2026 at 8:11 pm #457671
Thomas168ParticipantInteresting title. But not much detail to understand the reason for the end of relationship nor the job. If what got you into a PIP was opening your mouth then what was the reason for doing so? You did not like the wording or language used in the evaluation?
An example for me was, a new night manager comes in and gives a big speech about how it is unacceptable to not come in to work even in the case of a snow storm. Well, the next snow storm, the manager did not come in to work. So, I spoke up in the break room. I said that the manager made a big deal about not coming into work due to a snow storm. And that he himself did not come in. Well, the next day, I get called in and yelled at for saying this. I knew there was no winning. No matter what I would have said. It would not stop his revenge. So, I quit after a couple of weeks. I could have escalated to the higher up and taken my chances. But, managers tend to protect other managers. I learned my lesson. Talk less and live to fight another day.
If you spoke your mind and got shut down by your ex then probably the relationship needed some work? I did that once and I got to spend the night without sleep and apologizing for what I said. Admitting you are wrong even if you believe you are not. Well, life goes on. Hope you find other work and a better relationship. Just learn from any mistakes.
May 16, 2026 at 10:06 pm #457942
anitaParticipantHey Alecsee:
I just looked at your very first post on the forums, March 4, 2019, and it was about your ex saying something about your “emotional outbursts”, which connects to the topic of this thread,May 5, 2026-
7 years, 2 months and 1 day ago.
I want to look at this further tomorrow or in the next few days.
If you’re reading this, I’d love to read your thoughts about the connection between your first thread and the current.
🌿✨️🌿 Anita
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