Hi Steve,

I admit on your last posts I was lurking a bit but never answered because everyone was saying what I would have said. 🙂

But you choosing between two girls and then them changing their minds reminds me of an old obscure movie. It involved a guy, and a girl, there was a murder, and they caught the killer (the guy) because ~ wait for it ~ she kept a diary. In real life this wouldn’t have been shocking, but in the movie it was. He was truly mystified. He viewed her as a bit of an object and was blown away that she had her own feelings, thoughts and will!

In your old posts it seemed (to me) that you were choosing between two options in the store. But then you go back and both brands have been discontinued! LOL! Now, I could be wrong, but that was the impression I got. Always remember that women are very powerful and are actually the same as men ~ only the plumbing and the hormones are different!

Then there’s the “I wouldn’t want to be part of a club that would have me as a member” mentality. Instead of thinking, “Girl A dumped me and now Girl B wants me, but she must be really bad if she wants me, Girl A sure doesn’t!” Or, you can view her as a Gift. As in “Girl A made a mistake, but Girl B is smart and sure knows how to pick ’em!”

Lastly, view dating as fun! You don’t “Need” to get married. You can just have a good time, meet new people, and of course, Who Knows??? But don’t be attached ~ I think that’s the key to your happiness.

You seemed so surprised and hurt that the two women left though ~ and if I’m wrong, then one thing’s for sure ~ you take things very deeply! (Which is not always a bad thing!) Maybe online dating isn’t for you ~ try letting your friends and family know you are dating again and if they could set you up ~ I bet you would have better chances with a friend of a friend or family friend ~ not some strangers you meet online.

Hi Steve,

First off, I am really sorry if anything I am about to say sounds harsh. I’ve been reading your different threads and have commented some here and there, and feel you’ve gotten a lot of great advice. I also think you sound like a really great guy. Truly!!

I think you need to lighten up about this whole thing. Just enjoy yourself, your family, your friends, your life. From what you’ve described of the relationship you had with the woman you can’t shake – you didn’t really KNOW her. You knew some, and filled in the blanks of all the rest, probably with qualities you WANT. People are their most charming selves in the beginning! Especially when they’re kind of aloof. So yea, it’s easy to see how she kind of became your ideal woman, and how you would wonder and wish that you had met her sooner. I’m sorry your ex-wife did not deserve a good man like yourself. As I said already, I think you sound like a catch…loyal, expressive, caring – you are bound to find someone (or be found by someone) who IS deserving of you. Probably when you’re not looking or least expect it.

Good luck Steve, keep us posted. 🙂

Hi Steve,

Sounds good.

Big blue

1) Atleast a big majority of women(And Men) fake themselves . They Try to show That They are nice , modest , They fake interest in You when sometimes they may not be that attracted , or they may appear all nice and fluffy till your marriage starts and after a few Years , Everythig goes down the drain And You ask ” What went wrong ? ” Well . Everything went wrong . Maybe she wasnt the person You thought she was from the beginning itself . Maybe that’s why the girl You say You like left . You say you had a nice relationship …. And everything went right …. so then why did she Leave ? Well ask yourself . Maybe she is not that uprighteous . Maybe she wanted the bad boy type Or she wasnt really ven attracted to You … she just hid it . Why do you think she falls into the perfect “princess” image ? Ok . Lets suppose she was not perfect (Well no one is ) but Your relationship was perfect . Why didnt she call You atleast once When You sort of lost contact ? ? She could have atleast maintained friendship with You , couldnt she ?
Ok . Not all girls are like this . But some are .

2.) The second question You have to ask is not “Why do we always want what we cant have ” BUT ” Why cant we have what we always want ?” Well , that’s life . If Everyone Gets what They want , Hey then Eveyone would have been happy … right ?

So Thats why dont try to find the perfect person . Accept little imperfections .

No one is perfect in the worlds eyes , but even though You cant find a person who is fully perfect in your eyes , you will get someone who is atleast some percent perfect .