Home→Forums→Relationships→Why am i uninterested on her now, after liking her for 4 years
- This topic has 1 reply, 2 voices, and was last updated 4 years, 3 months ago by Peggy.
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August 26, 2020 at 7:05 am #365591AnonymousInactive
Hi everyone,
So i have this feeling towards a girl (she’s 17 and im 21) since 4 years ago, it was when i was in highschool and she’s in middle school, at that period i confess to her and she reject me stating that she doesnt want to like anyone and only regards everyone as a friend… if she’s ready for a relationship she said it would be in a very long time in the future.
(She’s in highschool now, next year she’s in uni… the uni she’s gonna apply is just 45 minutes away from my town, which is on another city… and im working now in my parents company at our hometown)
After she said that i still keep in contact with her, hoping that she’ll finally have feelings for me… i also keep chasing other girls while i keep feelings for her.
Just now, i just replied her insta story to keep in contact with her, so that when she’s in uni im still close to her (the last time we texted is a month ago). She replied me as usual in which she regards me as her close friend, but its just that the way she replies now isnt that fun like it used to, and i also felt changes in me as i also feel tired to reply her, like im too lazy and uninterested in her…
Then we ended the conversation today too, usually we keep texting for a week, could be more…. and i dont feel anything idk why. I feel afraid because i’ve dedicated 4 years on her and why am i feeling uninterested on her as i planned to chase her more when she’s in uni where she’s more open later on relationshipAlso i havent have a crush on anyone besides her for a year and i havent met anyone new for me to crush on, and this makes me thought that she’s my best choice now, but this uninterested feeling wont go away… im confused as i used to obsessed and like her a lot. Like i felt that she’s the one for me
Do u think its best to feel this way or should i have that feeling of liking her again with this mindset?
Felix
August 26, 2020 at 12:06 pm #365612PeggyParticipantHi Felix,
Between the ages of 17 and 21 you have been chasing this girl even though she has made it clear that she isn’t interested in having a love relationship with you. If she hasn’t changed her mind in 4 years, then it is time for you to move on. You sound as if you have put a lot of energy in maintaining contact and now you have grown tired of it. It is not healthy to obsess over someone. You don’t need to feel confused that your feelings have changed. You just need to accept it. This is just a normal part of growing up.
You don’t have to have someone new in your life immediately. Let this first girl go. It is not fair to anyone else for you to be with them when you really want to be with someone else. You will meet someone new who can return your love. Just believe that it will happen. You say you are working but you don’t say whether or not you have any hobbies or interests other than chasing girls. Focus your mind on doing the things that you love to do and be happy in yourself. This will attract people to you. Most people have fond memories of their first love but very few people stay with that person forever.
Best wishes
Peggy
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