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What is the best way to make my INFJ ex bf miss me/jealous after a breakup?

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  • #65774
    Jen A.
    Participant

    I am currently in a grieving stage over my INFJ boyfriend breaking up with me after going through a divorce and needing space after a huge fight we had during that time, where I hurt him with words, ultimately questioning him as a man (not realizing it) and making him question our relationship and pushing him to not want a girlfriend at the moment…… well even though we are broken up I still believe he is my soulmate and the “One” and I read some articles online to try 30 days no contact………currently at 2 weeks. For the record, he has reached out slightly by sending me a movie trailer to our fave movie sequel and liking some recent photos I posted……….

    Some articles suggest posting happy pics to make it seem I’m moving on and happy, enjoying my life etc….. not needy….. and also pics that will make him a little jealous (pics with me and a bunch of girls and guys having fun etc), not over doing it of course, meanwhile others suggest not posting anything online at all, no updating profiles etc to make him wonder what I’m up to and it’ll make him miss me more and contact me sooner…….. so I’m wondering what’s the safest, most best way to make him miss me/jealous and ultimately make him want to reach out to me without pushing him away for good keeping in mind he is an INFJ personality?

    Thanks so much!

    • This topic was modified 10 years, 1 month ago by Jen A..
    #65777
    Lucie
    Participant

    Hi JenA,

    Well, if he is giving you silent treatment i’d suggest you

    1. Make yourself busy in doing things you love or hang out with your friends, try to concentrate upon yourself first. Because it’s you who is being stressed out. Be happy in yourself.

    2. If he sent you the movie sequel and ended up in liking your pics perhaps means that he is still there but hesitates to contact you or he is waiting for you to make the step towards apology.

    3. So my dear stay cool! 🙂 it happened to me too, most guys love to torture their girlfriends rather to make the first step.

    4. If he loves you too he’ll come back no matter how far he’s from you. It’s just a matter of time. Time heals you know.

    I hope everything goes right for you. Smile! 🙂

    #65784
    Jen A.
    Participant

    Thanks so much @lucie – we already apologized to eachother via letters – but he confirmed in his return letter that he couldn’t be in a relationship right now and was grieving and couldn’t drag me through the mud and be that guy for me right now………

    4 days after the letter I sent, and his return, is when he sent me the movie trailer and started liking pics, but that was 2 weeks ago and has since cooled off……… so I’m wondering if I should just reach out at this point or what I can do to make him make the first move? I don’t believe in playing games but I’m wondering if maybe it’s not so bad afterall?

    Thanks again:)

    #65787
    Lucie
    Participant

    Hi!

    You don’t have to urge him to make the first move my dear. Let him think over this matter because i think you both are mature enough to understand and its high time for both of you to take the right decision.

    So try keep yourself busy with something you love and don’t worry this much.

    I hope it makes good to you and chill! 🙂

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