When you say “forgive him” do you mean that you’ll feel he did you no harm and he’s not that bad a dude, or do you mean you’ll stop ruminating and being angry with him? Because if it’s the latter, then your second-to last sentence basically says: “I won’t move on completely until I move on.”

Exactly. You won’t move on until you move on. There’s actually nothing in your way. Just give yourself some time to have the emotions you’re having, and gently remind yourself from time to time that it’s OK to move on now. Or later, if you’re not ready yet.

You were hurt. Don’t try to bludgeon your hurt into submission by insisting you have to forgive him. Just allow the hurt to pass through.

Okay…I look at it a bit differently.
Forgiveness is SO important and it’s as much about forgiving yourself, as him.
Perhaps you need to forgive him as an aid in forgiving yourself for “being such a fool”. That’s what I read between the lines….but I could be wrong, as I have been…once in the past !

So, step one…..UNDERSTANDING. If you can understand why he, and you, have made these decisions, you’re a good part of the way there. In general, people don’t set out to be tools. Most of us try to live our lives well and get on with everyone else. However, we have all been programmed by our past lives…so we all think and act a bit differently. Underneath, he and you are both good people, trying to get by as best you can. Our actions are somewhat separate from us…and are dictated by our past programming. What I’m saying is play the ball, not the player. He has made his decisions and you have made your decisions based on what you believe and what you have been programmed with. Sometimes those decisions work, sometimes they go belly-up. That’s life.

If you can accept that his, and your decisions, may not have been perfect…based on what has happened since…you will be able to see the learning from those decisions. Both he and you will probably act a little different if a similar situation comes along. That’s learning. Be thankful for that.

If all that makes sense, then certainly you can feel some hurt…it’s a natural emotion…but forgiveness shouldn’t be too far away. You’ll then be ready to move on to the next stage of your life…better equipped to handle the inevitable curve balls.