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Hi Malaya,

I think you pretty much answer you own questions by asking them.  You are quite aware of what’s going on as far as you and your bff’s personalities and how they mesh.  What you aren’t considering though, it seems to me, is that your awareness is an asset to be used and not just some noise in the background.  Who you are and what you want and who he is and what he wants are not just aspects of your relationship to be worked around, they are the key factors that form the base upon which your relationship is founded.  They come first, before the details about whether he calls you or not or whether he pays attention to his game or to you or how often he texts you etc.  Sure, those details are clues as to how you guys are feeling about yourself, each other and your shared relationship.  But they are not the reason for you two to engage in a romantic partnership.  You say that you are “clingy” and “needy.”  Big red flag there in my eyes since neither of those particular traits are going to really serve you well in a solid, positive, mature relationship.  My advice would be to take a step back and try to honestly determine what it is you want in a relationship.  That way you can gain some insight into who you are in terms of what it is you value, which will go a long way toward helping you to be happy.  Certainly, you will make mistakes because that is how we all learn, but those mistakes don’t have to hurt as much or be as confusing when you can confidently stand by your own choices without questioning why you made them because you made them.

Aside from all that, you guys have been dating for a week, I think is what you are saying.  Let that sink in and then think about how the emotions you are feeling so strongly and letting yourself become so preoccupied with are generated from a week of being with your bff.  Sure, a lot can happen in a week and you can learn tons in that period of time but as far as relationships go, or your life for that matter, it’s not a whole lot of time.  Step back, learn about yourself, learn about your boyfriend, look into your questions and try to find the answers that you have already woven into them.  I believe you know much more that you think you do.  Listen to this inner knowledge and go spend some time teaching yourself how to hear it more clearly.  Things have a way of falling into their correct places and once they do, often it is the case that we already knew, to some degree or other, what those places are and were letting ourselves get confused and upset out of habit, trust in that.