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Mentally shattered

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  • November 29, 2018 at 4:25 am #266615
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear Paul:

    It is only last night that you found out that she had a one night stand and  is  pregnant, and that one night occurred while the two of you were  on a  break?

    You mentioned working, and this is Thursday, are  you going  to work  today?

    anita

     

     

    November 29, 2018 at 5:07 am #266621
    paullyt
    Participant

    Hi Anita,

    Yes only last night I found out and I am in work today. I spent most of my morning crying in the bathroom and I just feel so low…

    Yeah we have been broken up for about 4 months now but still speak everyday and i have slept with others but i was careful and she has got pregnant which has really hurt me because we had such a strong connection and love and now just a few months later she is pregnant with another mans child and we talked so much about having that ourselves after we got married. It’s just so hard to get my head around it…

    November 29, 2018 at 5:24 am #266625
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear  Paul:

    When shocked, or “mentally shattered”, sticking to a routine is very important. So I hope you focus best  you can at work and  make  it through the day, then go home and do the fundamental routine tasks you do every day but rest more than usual, alone. Get  comfortable, listen to relaxing music and/ or take a long  walk in nature, and do so every day for a while, so the  dust settles in your brain, so to speak.

    Regarding the  matter  that shattered  you, if you want  to  discuss  it and  you can handle it, we can, but if  we do and  it gets distressing, better to not discuss  it and  distract instead, focusing on the workday and tasks at hand.

    The two of you were on a break but you still were together, I understand, I mean officially separated but  practically together?  And during that break you had sex  with  other women, she  knew  about  it but you didn’t know she  was having  sex with another man, or other  men?

    anita

    November 29, 2018 at 7:34 am #266763
    Inky
    Participant

    Hi paullyt,

    I wouldn’t look at it as “She loved me” or “she didn’t”.

    The sending of the nude photos for money (while she had a job) and the getting pregnant with another man’s baby the minute she had unprotected sex (while she knew she could easily get that from you) REEKS of a woman struggling with desperation.

    But the mental illness of it is (there, I said it) is that there is no REASON for her to behave this way. It’s not like she was broke. It’s not like it’s Life During Wartime (when these kind of random pregnancies occur).

    Listen, my friend: SOMETHING IS WRONG WITH HER.

    This breakup is a blessing.

    Don’t get sucked into raising her baby. (The next illogical step)

    Inky

     

    • This reply was modified 6 years, 4 months ago by Inky.
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