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Male advice needed on texting…

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  • December 16, 2014 at 12:18 am #69323
    Lexie
    Participant

    Hi there. Am a newbie here but do enjoy Tiny Buddha and associated wisdoms 😉

    Without going into too much background history – Im seeking some advice from men around the ‘motives’ of married men sending texts to married women. Just not sure what is acceptable or not – eg, is it OK to text married female work colleagues about non-work issues (whilst at home) . A couple of female friends I’ve talked to about this say its ‘not on’ and wouldn’t like their own husbands doing this!
    So basically, married man texts me (married woman) – we are work colleagues. Texts are non-sexual, non-work related – but two text messages were recently sent to me whilst at home unwell. A little unusual and probably would not do to other female work colleagues. There has been a teeny bit of flirting and we get on extremely well at work.
    I have been through a recent experience with another married man (ex work colleague) so not sure about this one! Am not reading too much into it as do not want to analyse. I am pretty sure he is happily married.
    Just curious to hear what men think on this and their views
    Cheers and thanks 🙂

    December 16, 2014 at 2:06 am #69327
    Rock Banana
    Participant

    Nobody can really answer this except you, as it’s obviously your choice what boundaries you want to have. I recommend you get really clear about what you want in life and your relationships, really grounded in your values and then you won’t have to look out into the world to find out what is ok and what is not. You’ll know from deep within yourself. And obviously through communication with your husband.

    The “motive” of the man could be absolutely anything, I’m not sure on a forum we are apt to judge what this guy is after, if anything.

    December 16, 2014 at 5:42 am #69329
    Inky
    Participant

    Hi Lexie,

    A simple solution is to simply not reply to the text! Then, if he ever has the yen to text you again, he will notice that you had never replied to his first one! He will be unlikely to do it further after that. If he asks you about it say, “Oh yeah, I think I got them.” He will discern that you are either not interested or not a texter.

    Wishing you Simplicity and Discernment,

    Inky

    December 16, 2014 at 4:14 pm #69374
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    Hello Lexie,
    If what you are doing isn’t tearing apart his marital boundaries, I see no problem. Although you might think real hard about your next text to him. It is hard to convey emotions through electronic means, so you must tread lightly in the process. I text a fellow classmate due to our involvement in course curriculum. She is happily married too and our dialogue has no romantic undertones to it at all. Just be extremely careful, and don’t let your emotions get in the way

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