Hi Joe,

Two reasons to hope.

One is it was so sudden. Did something suddenly happen? Or was she planning this all along, and made sure the last few weeks were great? Hopefully it is a random mood and she can suddenly change her mind.

The other reason to hope is a horrible one. If she has MS, she’s going to need a lot of support in the future. More so than she might realize. Story: My neighbor wanted a divorce. We were all, “You can’t divorce her. You get sick all the time. You’re always in the hospital. Who will take care of you?” It was all true. They are still together and he “got over it”, whatever “it” was.

The only people you should be thinking about is your kids. Why did you choose someone who’s not into them in general? And then the poor kids! They finally bond with this character and she’s all “No thanks”. Don’t ever do that again. Next time have an every other weekend girlfriend. She should be like a ghost to them. “Yes, Daddy has a girlfriend somewhere, but we never see her, we and Daddy are rock solid.”

And for you and this one, there is a slight chance she’ll change her mind. Maybe. But don’t obsess or chase her too much, or she will get away. But if she doesn’t like kids, maybe that’s a good thing.

“She’s one of these people that makes her mind up then locks everything away in a box, never to be seen again.’

My ex was exactly like that. She had this confidence that was so beautiful but daunting. When she was figuring out something herself and she had a conclusion, she would be totally convinced. And nobody could her change her mind.
I kind of admire that, but i hate it aswell because its all over now.

Your girlfriend left you quite quickly. All of the sudden everything changed. I think you deserve some answers. Not knowing is the worst part of it all. If all you ‘had’/’have’ mend anything to her, she should give you at least the reason of breaking up.

but that is just my two cents.

Well, every person has their basic ideal of a relationship. Things they ‘want’ or ‘require’ in a relationship. When your together for two years, she must have realised one of those ‘requirements’ fell short in the relationship. Isnt there anything she may have mentioned over the last two years, things she would like differently? I dont believe that after two years you just fall out of love. You realise something is missing. A person can’t end a relationship after one weekend of doubting. Something has been on her mind a lot longer.

So it’s simple. Revisit her ten or fifteen years later. At least she’s mature enough to realize the depth of her own immaturity. What woman can’t handle kids part time? Even her own?? I know you love her, but Yikes! She sounds like a kid herself. Consider it a bullet dodged.

I also thought of something ~ I bet she’s feeling very real GUILT about her own kids. Like, “OK, I only see them a few times a week, and now I’m seeing his kids for half the week, so why did I give up my kids, when I’m going to be surrounded by kids anyway???”

• This reply was modified 10 years, 7 months ago by Inky.