Dear Rebecca:

I am so sorry that you were assaulted, that you were assaulted repeatedly, and that it resulted in permanent injury.

“I want to clear any bad karma I have.  Can I do this by donating to charity?  (Since it is not practical or safe for me to contact people concerned)“- I am not a karma expert, but I think that donating to charity is fine, if you keep enough of your resources to take good care of yourself.

“Also, what are my obligations concerning forgiveness to those who have sought to harm me?“- again, I am not a karma expert, but my thought is that you are not obligated to forgive someone who repeatedly assaulted you and caused you permanent injury.

I hope other members who are educated in regard to karma will reply to you. Please feel free to post again anytime and express yourself. I would like to read more from you, and reply further.

anita

Since we do not know the specifics of why these people want to assault you, we can not give advice to action to prevent more assaults. You should consider removing yourself from those situations somehow. May be even think about calling police. Get order of protection.

Karma is a big subject filled with many opinions. Many books are written about it. Who is right? IDK. My opinion (please do not hate on me for my opinion) is that what you sow is what you reap. Plant an apple tree then an apple tree will grow. It can not become an orange tree. Read somewhere if you live by the sword then you will die by the sword. Now, others think karma is an outside force that creates justice. Like, hurt someone intentionally and the universe will hurt you back. For me, there is no agency to dispense justice. Justice is a human idea. For me, karma is wrapping your essence around others. If you are kind then kindness returns to you. If you are cruel then cruelty will be returned to you. What you sow is what you reap.

Donating money does not remove karma. Clearing karma (true karma, in my opinion) requires one to remove doubts and live the life of compassion and wisdom. Living in this way will bring you mental peace. Compassion is not just empathy. And wisdom is not just knowing stuff.

Your obligation of forgiveness? Your obligation is to try to let the hate or any emotions associated with these assaults … let them go. Sometimes it requires us to forgive so we can move forward and away from these ties. This is not an easy task.

I hope you take appropriate action to protect yourself from harm. And that you can find a happier future.

Yes, living in social groups, gives opportunity for others to have intentions or good or harm. But, their intentions are not your intentions. It is not you sowing nor reaping. It is theirs. When a person causes you injury, your anger and thirst for revenge becomes peaked. They sow harm and harm returns to them. That is living this life. Buddha said that life is dukkah (suffering). Some say that the life we live in now is because of our previous Karma. Whether it is or not, I do not know.

Doubt, compassion and wisdom are all about walking the eightfold path outlined by the Buddha. Although they do not use words like doubt. I use doubt as not believing, not putting the proper effort in, not having faith, not able to see the truth. Compassion and wisdom, being able to see the truth of a situation and being willing to help as one can.

Thinking of one’s life as a freshly fallen snow. Then someone walks thru our life and leaves a trail. We want our life to be back to that first fresh snow fall. But, we can not. The more we push snow into the foot prints then more we mess up the fresh snow. If we try to avoid looking at it then we hide the truth from ourselves. But, if we accept the foot prints and allow it to be then the next snow fall will brighten up the snow again. Moving past it we will see fresh snow again. If we hold onto the hurt caused by others then the more we hurt ourselves. So finding forgiveness provides a release from holding onto this hurt. It does not mean to forget. It does not mean to be as before. It means it will not have a hold on you. I do not have access to give you which will free you from this hurt and pain. No one can just give one instructions to free oneself from hurt. Only you can. I wish you well.

Note: Yes, the analogy falls apart. Just like in life, when we go down to smaller and smaller details, the laws that govern our world do not quite apply.

Dear Rebecca:

In my reply here I will refer to karma as the idea, or principle of Cause and Effect, meaning that what we say and do affects (has an effect on) other people, and what they say and do affects (has an effect on) us. It’s a simple idea, something that supposedly everyone knows, right? But not so. For example, my mother used to say terribly hurtful things to me. When I complained about it somehow (as a teenager), she told me that her hurtful words should have no effect on me, that there was something wrong with me for taking offense. She didn’t see herself (or if she did, she didn’t present herself to me) as the Cause of my hurt feelings, and therefore, she continued to verbally offend me.

When we are aware of the principle of Cause and Effect, and we care to not offend others, then we are motivated to be selective as to our words and actions, so to not offend or harm others.

The way I see it,  we live in a world where all humans (who are old enough) are harming others, and unnecessarily so. Some more than others, some less frequently.. in different ways,  but we are all stuck in a world where we harm and are harmed. To put it in a different way: there is and has been for centuries so much harm in the world, that no one is free from harm: not as the receiver of harm, and not as the giver of harm.

This is not to say that harming others is okay, no, not at all. What I am saying is that if you expect yourself to never harm anyone, you are setting an unrealistic expectation for yourself, and in so doing, you’d be stuck in shame and guilt forevermore. And if you expect this from others, you are setting an unrealistic expectations for them, and you will be stuck in distrust of all.

The solution, if such was possible, would be for every individual to be aware of the principle of Cause and Effect and care to do-no-harm. To have it as a value and a goal to not harm others, while not expecting perfection in this regard. We need to tolerate and endure the fact that sometimes we will hurt other people’s feelings.. by mistake, because we didn’t think through something we said before saying it.

You suggested in your original post, as I understand it,  that you were assaulted because maybe you did something wrong: “If it was concerning something I did, I think it was a very long time ago .I.e. childhood“- do you feel guilty for something that you have done as a child, a wrongdoing of some kind, something that is difficult for you to forgive yourself for?

anita