I had a strong connection towards a person for 5 years. I don’t understand this connection and at the beginning I thought it was just a normal crush on a person. We barely know each other. I thought the feeling will be gone just like every normal crushes, but this one is not like it.

On the fourth year, we met up for a drink. The weird thing was that 2 days before the meeting, instead of feeling happy and excited, I actually cried for no reason. The meetup was quite boring and I didn’t feel anything. The feeling I had for this person suddenly turned off. So I thought perhaps I was just into the ideas of the person. After the meeting, I thought we can just stay as friends, but only to find out the feeling came back. I felt somehow connected to this person. At that moment I realized there must be something more but I just don’t understand what it is and I think I was crazy. This person drunk texted me several times, wanting to meet me, but then didn’t remember anything when sober. I felt disrespected. I also heard things about him. They all have the same story that he just want to sleep around. So I unfriended him, move on and try to forget, even though some weird connection was still there.

About two months ago, I stopped to feel the connection completely, and thought this weird karmic situation is over. If there was a visible line which connected us, then the line was cut.  I started to go out more, have fun and meet up with friends. However, I see signs of him everywhere like crazy. The cute guy I met at a club have the same name as he is. I start to hear and see his name more often. I try to convinced myself that perhaps the name is just popular. About 3 days ago, I hung out with a guy friend I kinda like a while back ago (although I don’t have a strong connection towards him). This is where things go crazy. This guy friend of mine suggested to meet at the same coffee chain, showed up wearing literally the same shirt and ordered the same drink as the one I had a strong connection with. It looked like a deja vu, felt like a deja vu. Recently, I started to noticed the sign 11 11 too; although I have no idea what those signs mean.

Am I on the right path to forget him, if so why do I keep seeing signs of him? I felt like there is some “unfinished business” between us, but this connection was too weird and confusing and I stopped feeling it within myself. Those signs appear as some external/environmental forces… if that even makes sense. I really need advice on this.