Dear lonedove:

I thought, incorrectly, that the “real life stories” in your second post sentence: “I always try to encourage those who post real feelings, real life stories on Facebook”- to include what you didn’t mean to include (relief).

Before Facebook, I found self help groups to be the place to express my authenticity. It was a safe place because there were observable rules: not to interrupt  a person’s share, not to “cross talk” and “using I/me/my statements (instead of “you) were two of the rules, as I remember.

The “hole” you mentioned, when not authentic- yes, a gaping, widening hole in my case, for many years, and the misery matched it. There is peace and mental health in being authentic, true to oneself.

I hope you post again if … this is authentic and helpful to you.

anita

Dear lonedove:

How exciting: you are the first person other than me, on this website, in my experience here, who is referring to the Freudian Ego and not to the Buddhist Ego!

When you don’t feel like being vulnerable, when it doesn’t feel authentic, it is when the Id (aka inner child) is saying: no, I don’t want to! Don’t want to! I am scared!

The Superego, when it takes after an un-empathetic parent, may make fun of the Id, talk down to it. But the Ego, if you are in the process of healing, will take the hand of the scared child and slowly lead her to take a small vulnerable step, just one, because it is for your benefit.

When a kind Ego replaces the unkind Superego, being gentle and patient with the Id, “parenting” that inner child with love, then a choice that doesn’t feel right is authentic because it comes from self care.

Does it make sense to you, what I wrote here?

anita

Dear lonedove:

In my last post to you I was talking strictly Freud. I made no reference to the Buddhist Ego. As far as the latter, you can look at Wikipedia, ego in Buddhism or the like. I’ve been so removed for so long from the latter concept that I do not remember at this point.

anita