I hate to say it but I do not like her. I want to hear what others have to say about this.

Before I dated my boyfriend, I was first friends with his sister. We got pretty close but soon after becoming friends, I found out that she is so fake. She would talk about me and all my friends behind our backs. She would say she hates someone to me then I would see her be best friends with them? Which I just don’t understand how to one person you can say “I hate blah blah she is a weirdo I hate her” but then be her best friend. So, we were friends but I wouldn’t consider her a real friend, you know? I didn’t really trust her. Before I realized she was kinda fake, I had told her who I liked. I liked this boy for 3 years before telling her and she was literally the FIRST person I told. Soon after I began telling people (she was the first I told), we started dating. This was literally the love of my life at the time (I was 15). We had all the same interests, he was so easy to talk to, he was my best friend and I had no doubt in my mind that he liked me as much as I liked him. He was a really good person, still to this day one of the BEST people I know. So honest and just deep down a good person. But eventually he broke up with me and I have this really big hunch it had to do with her. Because soon after we broke up they started dating. (This all sounds like stupid drama, I know). Knowing her and knowing him, I bet she would talk badly about me to him which probably led him to believe I was a bad person. Besides the point, I don’t care about this guy anymore and at the time I was hurt but I moved on quickly knowing he wasn’t worth my time. Plus, he was my best friend and I knew he was a good person with good intentions. The point is she clearly didn’t care much about me to start dating the guy I had wanted to be with for 3 years. She knew how long I liked him and knew she was the first person I told as well. The point is… she didn’t care about girl code or any of that stuff that friends follow. The point is, she made it clear to me that she didn’t care to treat me like a real friend would. I wasn’t mad about her dating him, I just got the message about where I stood in her life, you know? Anyway, about a year later her brother started flirting with me. He was a senior in high school and I was a sophomore. I obviously turned him down because I had no desire to be with him at all plus I was kinda friends with his sister. However, my 2 best friends were dating 2 of  HIS best friends. So, it was kinda hard to avoid him. I had no desire to hangout with him but on a friday night when my 2 best friends were out with their boyfriend’s friends.. I obviously came because they were my best friends. Her brother was there because he was their friend. However, I was young and had never had alcohol before so when I drank it I did things I did not mean to. I did not know how to handle my alcohol. Her brother ended up taking my virginity, long story short, I became very attached to him. I am still with him to this day but looking back, it was a very painful experience to lose my virginity drunk to a guy I had no prior plans to be with. At the time, every party of my being wanted to be with him because he took away my virginity, you know? Those obviously still aren’t the reasons why I am with him today. Anyway, people would call me a slut for dating my friend’s brother. I didn’t understand why because his sister literally told me she didn’t have a problem with it. I think she was telling other people differently since she is fake. People would frown upon me dating my friend’s brother when 1) she told me she didn’t care 2) she could have said she had a problem with it 3) I was in a pretty dark place from going from being a happy, innocent teenage girl to a very confused, depressed person who didn’t know who she was anymore after having her virginity taken drunk (some people probably wouldn’t have a problem with this but I did) so I was doing what I felt was best. and 4) she already showed me she wasn’t a real friend anyway when she would talk badly on me and started dating my ex who I (at 15) really liked.

Even then I didn’t hate her because I guess it IS pretty bad to date a friend’s brother. I didn’t think it was right to dislike her at all. Besides the fact that she was fake and clearly not a good person, I didn’t really know what to do in my situation. I honestly felt guilty for being a “bad person” so I never disliked her.

Well, now after 2 years I dislike her a lot. And everything I tried to ignore before is coming to the surface. I don’t know. There’s always that “oh you are dating her brother, you betrayed your friendship with her so you have no right to dislike her, nobody is forcing you to be dating him” but ugh. She still talks badly about me. My boyfriend has told me before that she says “I look like an Indian” and “I have no personality”

First, looking like an Indian is not a bad thing but knowing her she obviously meant it as a bad thing. Also, it’s pretty offensive to be say somebody looks like an Indian simply because they are darker. I am spanish and middle eastern. Not Indian? Her ignorance honestly annoys me so much. And to say “I have no personality?” Really? I can assure you I have a personality and the only reason I can think of as to why she would say that is 1) I am awkward around people I don’t trust and 2) she is fake and I think people naturally hide their personality from people who they know will talk bad about them? I don’t know. I just had to rant about this. I don’t really know if I have a right to dislike her but I do. Am I wrong for this? Is it my own fault for dating him? I have no idea. I think she is dumb and annoying and it pisses me off that people look at me as the bad guy for dating her brother when she isn’t even a real friend. I obviously haven’t told any of this to my boyfriend and I don’t plan to start unnecessary drama. Oh, and I know she has said other things about me but it’s way too much to even mention. One of the things she says to everyone is that “I’m fake” which is ironic to me. I don’t know, maybe I’m overreacting or just being negative. Plus, I seem to not get along with his mom for the same reason. She talks badly on everyone as well and I don’t see her as a good person either (although I respect her and know she does a lot for her kids). Do I even have a place in disliking my boyfriend’s family? Is it weird that I love him but kinda dislike his mom and sister? I’m very confused.

• This topic was modified 6 years, 8 months ago by Katie.