Hi jessv22,

IMO, The only guys you can legitimately be friends with are boys you knew from before you met your BF. But now that you’ve been together for so long, there is probably no one you can be friends with individually. Does that make sense?

His anger… He probably has suspected stuff (that wasn’t true) for a long, long time. And then this third party (do you know who that is?) told him misleading information that made you look irretrievably bad.

Your friendship.. What are we talking about? Was it meeting up for coffee once in a blue moon? Hand holding? Social media Friend? An emotional affair can be just as damaging as a physical one. The fact that your BF had to hear about it from someone else can be seen as a betrayal in itself.

I’m sorry to say, you coming at him again and again was boundary busting, as if his wishes didn’t matter.

What I would do ~ and I would only do this once ~ is write a note and give it to his mother, explaining it also to her. And in the note write, “It’s a shame you would end a relationship over something I haven’t done based on what someone else with their own agenda would love to think is real. I never was going out with Friend behind your back, but I might as well now.”

Only write the note if you would consider going out with your friend (you might as well!) If not, just talk to the mother (who might calm him down). Then LET IT GO.

Good Luck,

Inky

Can you print out this post and give it to his mom?

You very honestly just explained it all right here.

Sadly I know your pain and what your going through, breaking someone’s trust and trying to figure out how to regain it is hard , especially when they cut off communication on your part is equally hard . I have done that recently and hidden things that came to light , some of it was harmful more than needed to be. Your doing all you can to get communication going and he is wrapped up in anger to here you , it feels like they are putting more pride in their hurt , pain and anger that you can’t get through him. In your situation , first try to find ways to occupy your thoughts and give him space , work on ways to forgive your self and learn from this, keeplease your self active . As for your friend decide how much you need him in your life and seek closure if you need to cut him out of your life .