Hi there !

I wrote here a few months ago about a difficult time i had with a close friend of mine.
In short, she confronted me about some feelings i may have for her. I confessed that she was right, and she didn’t handle it very well. She was quite angry and ignored me for 2-3 weeks, which seems to last years. We work at the same place, so you can imagine how hard it was to see your once close friend suddenly act as if you don’t exist anymore.
I tried to take inspiration from my buddhist readings and to act as normal and kindly as possible, and things eventually became quite normal again between us (or so i thought). We slowly came to chat again, and we even made plans to go see a show together this summer.
One month ago she asked me to come with here at a small gig in town, where a local singer was releasing his new record.
I was really happy to meet her out of the job, and i even took my day off to be sure that it was happening.
The day came two weeks ago. We were supposed to meet at 6pm, and i received a sms on my way, saying that she show was in fact at 7pm. A few minutes later she said that she had some car issues and will warn me if she was still coming. I was already in town so i walked a little and had a coffee, waiting for an update about her situation. One hour later i still hadn’t heard of her. I imagined she was stuck on the driveway or in a garage, so i made it to the musical event alone, bought the record for her and decided to come home. I send her a message about it, hoping that she was ok. She answered me later that she finally made it to the event and bought the record too. She said she had to borrow her father’s car and wasn’t able to park anywhere.
I was mad. That’s not a really buddhist thing i know, but i could’n help. I was obviously eager to see her and to share something like we used to do, and i felt ignored, as if our meeting didn’t matter at all to her.
I must admit i was still quite angry when we saw each other at the job, and i didn’t put any effort in being nice with her. She said she was sorry for me buying the record for no reason, but i said it was okay, as i was way more angry about the way she just ignored me when i was waiting to hear from her.
At the end of the week i thought it would be stupid to keep on being mad about it. I sent her an online message, saying that i had no attention to be mad at her, but that her behaviour was sometime hurtful. I should have know that she has a very strong personality, but i was still suprised by her reaction. She answered me that i was always making things so complicated, that it was no the first time and that our friendship was just not working.
And it was her turn to be angry. And she’s really good at it. She don’t talk to me anymore, and she even make effort not to cross my eyes when i cross her path at work. A few days ago i found my job locker full of all the comics i once shared with her.

Of course i am devastated by her reaction. Still, i try to behave as normal as possible, but the way she perfectly ignore me make it obviously difficult. Trying once again to behave like a wannabe buddha, i tried once again to talk to her online, even saying ironically that I was sorry if I somewhat hurt her and that i valued her friendship a lot. She once again answered me angrily, stating that she was fed up with this, that she doesn’t owe me anything and that i just wasn’t able to have female friend.
I don’t know if there is anything to try anymore, but it really hurt to see someone who was once very important suddenly willing to erase you from her life. I try to handle this strong feeling of rejection, but i can’t help to think about it a lot and to have many regrets. Some friends said to me that her behaviour was just childish and that i should forget about her, but i just can’t. If any of you have some advice about this sort of situation, i will really like it. I hope i will be able to answer, as it wasn’t possible on the last thread i created.
Thanks a lot.

Adam