Rebecca,

Your relationship was totally virtual.  I have found from experience that we tend to project onto the other person what we want to see/hear/know.  It is easy to get hooked emotionally.  I find that the day-to-day aspects are key in creating a close relationship for you inevitably bump up against each other’s issues and stuff.  There is no substitute for in-person interaction in order to create a close relationship.  Communication is not just voice.  A relationship is not just sitting in front of our respective computer screens to talk to one another no matter how personal we get.  Human touch and having a face-to-face connection are key ingredients to make a truly intimate relationship.

Go on and send him a letter.  Best to get things off your chest.  It takes two to make a relationship successful.  Best to leave him be and move on with your life.

Mark