so i was with him for only 2 years its been a vicious cycle of fighting making up no middle ground its been hard and painfull but its very addictive and the love and passion on our good days was like nothing ive felt before but we were going round and round and i said this is getting no better we can not carry on like this the extremes and intensity are too much paranoia insecurity jealousy mistrust on both sides he pleaded to try said he wanted to make it work i gave in had a few days together and tried to talk i felt that we needed to try and compromise find some middle ground that we were going over the same issues and without looking at them this couldnt move/change he didnt like that got angry walked out i fell apart he went to stay at our friends not far from here is still there its a small rural village its driving me nuts i am finding this so hard i am in pain i feel empty and and lonely and sad and i darenot see him as he seems to be able to sway me i have 4 lovely children i need to keep them settled this is home for us but i feel like a prisnor and cant even see the friends i used to in case i bump in to him