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Guilt before marraige

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  • #417826
    Kunal Singh
    Participant

    I am in long distance relationship with my girlfriend whom I will be marrying the next year. We have been into relationship from past 10 years long distance. I can only meet her once a year in a public place for a hour that’s it. As she can’t meet at some other place because of the area she lives in.

    I work n live in another city far from her. The thing that has kept us going is emotions we both have for each other, we fight, love back again & we evolve! But I have always been craving for physical need as my body wanted it, so I have one of my female friends in city I live in. We both share some good conversation about life, she knows I have a gf & she herself is single. After we mutually decided that we need to fulfil our bodily need we had physical contact. I often feel very guilty for doing this, but my friend says I know you might feel bad, but you have to respect that you didn’t lied to me about anything & I am okay with it, so should you be. I have been into mindfulness practice from past 3 years, it has saved my life.

    Kindly enlighten me with your thoughts! Much metta.

    #417989
    Roberta
    Participant

    Dear Kunal

    Please may i ask for clarification on a few points, How physically intimate were you with your friend and did it occur more than once and does your long distance girlfriend know about the physical side that you are sharing with another person? Andon your annual visit with your girlfriend are you physically intimate?

    #417990
    Kunal Singh
    Participant

    With my girlfriend we are physically intimate but that was long back because now where she lives is with her parents n we can’t meet except from public places.

    with my friend I had been physical quite number of times. No my gf doesn’t knows about it, bc it was my body need I feel daily work n family n my gf stress n all lead me here. N my friend she is a good person.

    #417991
    Kunal Singh
    Participant

    I came to my friends place, I told her that I am feeling guilty for what have I done, she told if u are feeling guilty don’t be physical & if you see the other way round, you body needed it. It happened, happened, now don’t as guilty you are feeling. She told there can be many perspectives if you would see & until now you have not married to your gf, once you marry her then it’s totally different case!

    please guide me something, a guided meditation that might help me.

    #417994
    Roberta
    Participant

    Dear Kunal

    I do not know whether the society that you & your girlfriend live in find it normal & acceptable to share intimacy with others ie having more than wife?

    Also how would you feel if the roles we reversed and your girlfriend turned to another for physical comfort?

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