Hi Anita

I am doing well!  Its been awhile since my last post.  Things are going great.  We have been married now for 10 months now.  I am starting to relax a bit now and not worrying so much my insecurities with our marriage.  I still, however, check his phone periodically.  Remember when I last told you about the woman I told off at our wedding dinner reception?  Well, I found her name in his contact list. There was no number .  I was assuming it was for fb messenger.  I deleted and blocked her again! I did not confront him about it . I found no secret conversations anywhere in his phone.  I did all this while he was asleep.  I really need to stop looking in his phone.   He still works long hours during the day and evenings.  Sometimes he will come home if it is slow.  Or he will come home early and tell me he misses me and wants to spend time with me.  Which i am happy about.   Sometimes I wish he can find a different job.But right now we are in the process of him becoming a citizen.  Which I am not sure how all that works, but hopefully us being married will make it a little easier.  I know that immigration still wants us to prove that our marriage is not fake and that it is a real true love marriage.

We actually went on a very nice vacation 2 weeks ago.  It was like our second honey moon.  I had my first plane ride, which was an incredible scary experience for me anyway.  But we had a wonderful time!

I am planning on a second vacation with my 2 sons from my previous marriage.   My sons are older. College age.  They absolutely love my husband and he loves them.  But unfortunately my husband cannot go on vacation with us for 5 days.  He told me he needs to work because he will not get paid for being off since he does ride share/uber/lyft.   I asked him if he is ok with me taking my boys and he said he is fine with it and wishes he can go but he just simply cant.   I get paid for being off on vacation.   I guess i am just afraid that he wont be here when i come back.  I always have that fear in the back of my mind that he will leave like he did before without notice.  That will always stay in my mind.   I know he won’t leave and has no real reason to leave.   I asked him what will he be doing while i am gone, he told me he wants to work a lot of hours cause he really needs the money to help pay for our bills, etc.   He said he wants to take me away for my birthday in a few months and he wants to save for that also.     I don’t know why i still keep having that fear.  I have not talked to him about it.

He is such a sweet, honest,caring, guy who will do anything for anyone.  He tells me everyday how much he loves me and how i am his everything.  He is so attentive to my needs.  I do feel safe and secure with him and i love him soooo very much.  I would give the world to him.   We never fight or argue.  We do however have some disagreements but its nothing that can’t be resolved.   We are each other’s best friend.

I guess, i just need to relax and stop worrying.