Hi Gaby

I’m sorry to hear about the breakup.

It sounds like the largest issue was with the baby mother.

The thing is that getting shared custody can be expensive and difficult. And he was aware that the BM is unstable. Things can get really nasty with unstable partners when custody is involved. Often men are on the losing side of these things because of sexism in the legal system.

At this point he’s already got access to his child. He just needs to keep her vaguely happy.

The downside is that this was making you unhappy because of the issues this woman caused.

It’s no easy thing being involved with a partner with an unstable BM.

It’s a shame that things ended up this way, but it sounds like you did the right thing. It’s a lot of stress and it’s honestly fair to say, this isn’t for me.

The grief and the anger make sense. During that period, you had someone abusive in your life. A lot of unfair things happened that aren’t usually tolerated. It’s going to take time to process the experience.

Unfortunately, your partner wasn’t ready for the journey of the legal battle yet to come. At some point I’m sure he’ll get around to it. It’s just not an easy decision or one that others can make for him. When it happens it will be difficult and he will need to be ready for that.

Wishing you all the best! 🙏

How are you, Gaby?

anita