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Challenges, obstacles … What to do?

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  • #64879
    Big blue
    Participant

    Hi TB community-

    What are you finding re: setbacks and growth? What is your approach?

    In the article link below…. Scroll to ‘self theories’ …. This is a good graphic about two mind sets. It reminds me that there will always be challenges and obstacles as part of my life and in the lives of others.

    I’m a few months into a new job, and trying relationships again. It’s not all smooth waters, that’s for sure! 🙂 But, things are going well overall. I expect issues, disagreement, mistakes, setbacks. I also expect to have fun, engage in new experiences, learn, push through challenges, have fixed feelings, be easy on myself, show compassion, accept different views and choices, make a persistent effort, take criticism purposely, see the positives in failure, celebrate and observe success in a team-others-me.

    http://www.nytimes.com/2014/04/13/education/edlife/10-courses-with-a-twist.html?_r=0

    Big blue

    #64901
    Matt
    Participant

    Big Blue,

    For me, “setbacks” are met as teachers, such as unexpected challenges that kind of spring up that need attention, are helping grow attention, concentration. “Alright, what’s here?” Or, if they’re internal, such as emotions that kind of spring forward, old habits, etc, they’re seen as old ruts that naturally erode over time. First, we notice a habit we wish to remove, then we notice when we do them, and then we figure out what to do instead with practice. Like our heart moving us to erode a habit that harms us… the oomf of it causes us to pay attention (first in reflection, memories of oops, then in realtime, such as stepping aside, doing something different), and we get “set back” less time over time.

    Much like in meditation, thoughts first “pull us away” from the meditation object, but as we watch it happen, keep coming back to the object, we’re pulled away for less time. “Setbacks” in this way, are really more like the way we balance our karmic account, step aside from our ruts, grow concentration, and so on. The the ruts can be pretty seductive, but if we keep at it, they go. It helps to laugh. Like, how many times we startle ourselves with a jack-in-the-box, and then start cranking the handle some more… 🙂

    With warmth,
    Matt

    #64918
    louise
    Participant

    Don’t expect #1
    Go through obstacles gracefully without resentment and your pain will draw God to see you through.

    #64926
    Big blue
    Participant

    Hi Matt and Louise,

    Thank you! Your outlooks are inspiring. Setbacks as teachers and having grace. Awesome to do! When I have done these things, it does work well for me. Being ok with discomfort is at the root for me.

    Big blue

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