Ashamed at my online/offline behaviour...

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This topic has 20 replies, 3 voices, and was last updated 6 years, 1 month ago by Airene.

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September 27, 2018 at 1:19 pm #227823

Airene
Participant

Hello AutumnGlow,

I’m wondering about the “rejection” you feel (from him online). If he hadn’t logged on less and less, but rather had continued to talk with you and contact you…would you feel differently? Did he lead you to believe he cared about you?

You are wise to not tell your husband about what happened and I agree with Anita that there is nothing to be gained by telling him. Come here and share your thoughts and feelings any time. You won’t be berated or shunned.

Airene

September 27, 2018 at 1:41 pm #227825

AutumnGlow
Participant

Hi Airene,

Yes, I felt very much that he gained my trust and was interested in me. I have no intention in telling anyone, let alone my husband about this. Like I first said, apart from one other social networking site no-one else knows. I had no-one I could talk to about this in my life at that time. I have friendships but felt unable to tell due to feeling such shame. I googled ‘shame’ and it says to talk it out to help reduce the feelings of it. It is only since coming on here my anxiety has dropped and I’ve received positive feedback that I can take away with me.

September 27, 2018 at 2:05 pm #227829

Airene
Participant

Hello AutumnGlow,

I’m so glad to hear that by coming here to talk your anxiety has dropped. Keep posting, any time.

Airene

September 28, 2018 at 11:30 am #227963

AutumnGlow
Participant

Hi Anita and Airene,

Just wanted to say thank you to you both for your help and support.

Whilst I still feel like I’ve let myself down I’ve also learned a great deal about myself and what I’m going to accept in my life. I’m only human and we do make mistakes but it’s also doing me no good carrying such a burden and I think (in time) I will forget this chapter in my life, or at least it won’t effect me in any way.

Like I’ve said previously if anyone else can relate to what I’m saying or has been through the same or similar…please feel free to get in touch with me on here x

September 28, 2018 at 11:48 am #227967

Anonymous
Guest

Dear AutumnGlow:

You are welcome. Indeed it does “no good carrying such a burden” because there is nothing for you to do about it. Emotions in people as in all animals, their purpose is to motivate the animal to do something (eat, run away, fight, etc.). And so, if there is nothing you can or should do in your personal life following that “online/offline behavior”, then there is no purpose for shame and suffering.

I think your offer to others to post to you if they experienced something similar is to help others with their shame and suffering, and that is, a generous offer on your part, if I understand your motivation correctly.

anita

September 28, 2018 at 2:31 pm #228027

Airene
Participant

Hello AutumnGlow,

It is so good that you posted and found some relief. Hopefully in sharing, your pain has lessened. You have helped others just by sharing your experience.

Airene
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