Hi a-coleman,

You have two options. Either dig deep, as venice did with his/her awesome advice. Or regroup.

I would try to get student loans, or take online or community college courses (take one course at a time, if possible). Maybe you can work in a bookstore, or get a different job. Or hire your services out (driver, tutor, etc.)

Find a place of worship and/or a rec center. Go for social reasons as well as physical/spiritual reasons. Meet your neighbors. Friends come in all ages when you’re not a student. IMHO it’s healthier to have an eclectic “tribe”.

Good Luck, no matter what your path/s!

Blessings,

Inky

Dear a-coleman:

Do you currently live with our parents?

How has life at home been for you as a child, and how is it now (if you still live at home)?

(I ask because I think it may be very relevant to your state of mind and life)

anita

Dear a-coleman:

The title of your thread is “alone, lost scared…” –

Growing up in your home, you wrote, you “always felt left out and lonely.” “It was always hard to get attention from (your) parents…basically ignored.”

Our experience as children at home is something we carry with us into adulthood and all through life. Childhood is called our “formative years” because our brains are literally formed in childhood. For a child it is scary to experience loneliness, lack of connection with at least one parent. And so, your brain (like mine) was formed with that loneliness, that fear of being alone, lost.

This loneliness, lack of direction (being lost) is not a life sentence. Competent psychotherapy can do wonders, especially for a person as young as you. I read that you don’t have much money, but if it is possible for you to have no-cost or very low cost competent psychotherapy, that would be my number one priority, if I was you.

In competent therapy, you can build a connection with the therapist, one where the therapist pays you the attention you always needed, and through this connection, you will feel less and less afraid, over time, and your life can change drastically.

I didn’t have a connection with a parent. I was alone, lost, scared .. and that experience carried through my twenties, thirties, forties… until I attended my first competent therapy at … fifty. I hope you have is much, much sooner.

Please post again. I will be glad if you do, and if I can be of any help. Will be back to the computer in about 12 hours. Good night.

anita

Hey, I am in the same boat as you right now. The only differences are that I never really had any real friends and at least you had experience with friends. Also college life is not going the way I wanted I feel as though i am just cruising by and wasting my time, thought many times of dropping out. Only if you want to, I would like to know more of your story about highschool and you not participating in much activities. I have a similar story although I live with my parents and siblings i don’t feel as close to them because we are really not that close and choose to not talk about very personal stuff.