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- This topic has 3 replies, 3 voices, and was last updated 10 years, 5 months ago by Momchil.
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May 30, 2014 at 10:38 am #57715SassypantsParticipant
Within a matter of 2 weeks I ran into my ex’s mother whom I love dearly and now today, my ex. It’s weird, I always sense that I’m going to run into him and I do. In seeing him, I was able to hug him and couldn’t stop smiling when I saw him. It was like time stopped and the air reeked of chemistry… A moment in time.
History: We broke up last June. We were on and off for a long time and dated for 7 years. Shortly after I unintentionally got into a new relationship that is healthy. I keep running into my ex and I get butterflies. My heart is still attached to him, but my mind is fighting it saying it was break up because it was broken. Why then does it keep resurfacing? I think about him often, even in my new relationship where I’m treated superbly.
Out of respect for my current boyfriend I will tell him ran into my ex. I’m just confused. Any advice on what to do would be appreciated.
Since this post, I have been thinking about my ex and I have the desire to act and see him. I know this is wrong but how do I ignore the feeling? Or do I act on it? I’m at a crossroad.
May 30, 2014 at 3:30 pm #57743MattParticipantSassy,
A little nagging itch, eh? Sounds like addiction to me, and not healthy. Consider he turned your body on something fierce, and the wounds are still pretty fresh… so getting urges is normal, usual. How many junkies get that itch and say “oh, just one more hit, just one more will be fine.”
Attend something else, dear sister… your breath, a hobby, your boyfriend. Wounds don’t heal if you keep picking at them. Exs don’t lose their control of us if we don’t take their pictures down off the walls of our home.
Still having some bedroom disappointment with the BF? This “feeling” of wanting to be with the ex may be filial lust, wanting some satisfaction from an inappropriate partner. Turn away, sis! Red flags are waving!
With warmth,
MattMay 31, 2014 at 12:20 pm #57778SassypantsParticipantThanks Matt. Duh, just needed to hear it.
May 31, 2014 at 3:24 pm #57783MomchilParticipantDear Sassy,
I know exactly how you feel. I’ve been in that situation and found my own way out of it. Everybody has a different path and so I will share with you what helped me.
I remeber how my last ex made me feel. It was amazing. A few weeks after we had broken up I still had feelings for her and I could not shake them off. My heart and my brain disagreed with each other. What helped me was a moment of peace and silence. I stood there by myself and let go of every thought. No, I did not follow my thoughts nor did I follow my heart. I dismissed them both. Only when they are no longer a factor can you hear the soft voice of your intuition. Odd though it may seem I recommend finding that soothing voice of your own intuition and following the advice it gives you, for better or worse. Only then will you have no regrets. -
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