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A helpless guy who thinks he is getting mad. I need your help.

Home→Forums→Tough Times→A helpless guy who thinks he is getting mad. I need your help.

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Viewing 4 posts - 1 through 4 (of 4 total)
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  • September 15, 2014 at 11:29 am #64908
    earthian
    Participant

    Sorry guys this post endedup being a lengthy one. Please bear with me till the end. I need your help
    Guys I am a 21 years old male and a jobless mechanical engineering graduate. Since my childhood I love automobiles which has led me to study engineering.

    I am telling you a story, my story after reading which my problem will be clear to you. The story starts from the time of appearing for entrance examinations to get enrollment in colleges. At that time I knew that to get into those top colleges one need to study really hard and get good grades in those exams. And considering the fact that it was my childhood dream you will think that I would have done just that. But I didn’t and as result got ended up in a high cost, mediocre college and ended up taking a education loan. Don’t know why but I didn’t studied at that time. This was not the last time I did that.

    Three years later I got an opportunity to work as a design head on a team participating in BAJASAE competition ( A student racing competition where students build off road vehicles and compete in various events). But I ended up spending the whole summer at my home when my team spent half the time waiting for me than they continued to built the car without me.

    Then during my final years I got an idea that is to start a bike customization business. As a result I didn’t sat on any of the campus recruitment drive for a job. worked on my idea for some time then I abandoned it because of lack of money and the educator loan.

    And here I am now getting mad at my own situation. I have started to think myself as a loser who just abandoned things just for no reasons. The above mentioned things are just a minor part of things that I have abandoned. I don’t want to clutter this forum with those things. I know that I am kind of a looser. One time I had a dream to start a automotive company but right now I think I will end up being a big abandon-er and a big looser in life.

    I don’t want to become that. I want to do something. I want to make great cars and bike. That is what I love. But I don’t know what is stopping me and why I am abandoning things and not taking my life seriously.

    Help me guys I need your help

    September 16, 2014 at 5:59 am #64931
    Inky
    Participant

    Hi earthian,

    Maybe you don’t take your life seriously because you don’t take you seriously.

    Dreams are great, but when it’s time to act on them, it is typical to “freeze”.

    “Because, what if you put in all this time and effort and it didn’t work out? It’s better to be a “loser” because you didn’t try than to be one because you gave it your all and found lacking. Then that’s “proof” that you are.” That’s what your subconscious mind is saying.

    The good news is you’re still young. Can you work for someone else and have your own projects going on as a weekend hobby? Maybe you’re freezing because you think it has to be all or nothing. Like, work for an automotive company first. Or, do things in the business that haven’t been done before. Blog about it. Become a guru. Do it for the love of cars and bikes, not for fame or fortune.

    • This reply was modified 10 years, 3 months ago by Inky.
    September 16, 2014 at 6:01 am #64933
    marie
    Participant

    Hello,

    First I don not think you are a loser and I hope you will start talking to yourself kindly because the way we talk to ourselves create our reality to a very big extent… that is good news because the better you talk to yourself the quicker you can change your reality. It might not be easy but it is possible.

    the other thing I would had is that you seem to have a negative belief about yourself being a loser- quiter… I am not sure when that started ? who ever told you you were a loser ? Often we end up believing things that we have been told when we were little even if they are not true… If you really find you cannot break this pattern of sabotaging yourself, it does not mean you are not capable or that there is something wrong with you. It means you need to get to know yourself and understand why you do what you do. Once you have some awarness you can work on changing your attitude and beliefs. Often times we need help in doing so and that can be – reading books about the “subject”, blogs with other people’s experiences of similar problems.. there is a very good platform on the net where you can find tones of information about everything and anything and it is called ted x. look it up. As well sometimes therapy can help, it sure helped me loads to move on from destructive thinking pattern that were unhelpful in my life too… Life is a journey and all that matters is now and doing your best , growing a day at a time and smiling, loving ourselves step by step… You are worthy and you have dreams that it s awesome now you need to work at undoing the barriers you have but you will grow and you can realise your dreams no matter what they are- be patient, love yourself, do your best and move forward !!! Hope this helps. a lot of love from another human being only doing their best too 🙂 xxx

    September 16, 2014 at 6:04 am #64934
    marie
    Participant

    and I very much agree with inky too 🙂

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