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Posts tagged with “Happiness”

Why Letting Go of What We Want Enables Us to Get What We Need

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“The most exquisite paradox: as soon as you give it all up, you can have it all. As long as you want power, you can’t have it. The minute you don’t want power, you’ll have more than you ever dreamed possible.” ~Ram Dass

The first time I felt this paradox was in the middle of savasana after a challenging yoga class. I always say that yoga is a metaphor for life, and this is exactly why.

Savasana is the final resting pose in which you lay flat on your back, close your eyes, and do nothing. A super yummy savasana …

7 Steps to Create More Love and Happiness in the Present Moment

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“The ability to be in the present moment is a major component of mental wellness.” ~Abraham Maslow

It was 4:00am, but I was wide awake. I wanted to be a great achiever, a great partner, and a great parent. Instead, I had turned into an irritable insomniac who no longer knew how to relax.

I was trying to do everything perfectly and be everything to everyone. Demands kept piling up. This made it tough to focus on the present moment.

A wandering mind is less happy than a mind focused on what it is doing, according to scientific research. …

An Open Letter To My Bullies: Thank You For Making Me Strong

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“The heart is like a garden: it can grow compassion or fear, resentment or love. What seeds will you plant there?” ~Jack Kornfield

Dear Bullies,

To be honest, I didn’t think I would ever write you a letter. As far as I was concerned, the amount of suffering I went through during my school years was enough to make me bitter.

I didn’t forgive you, and I most certainly wasn’t about to forget.

I remember those years like it was yesterday—the cruel name calling; the scrutinizing of how I looked, what I said, and what I did; the public …

How I Think My Friend Who Died Would Want Me to Live

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“Death is not the greatest loss in life. The greatest loss is what dies inside us while we live.” ~Norman Cousins

Have you ever been there?

When someone you love suddenly disappears. When life, within a few seconds, turns upside down. When your biggest problems suddenly seem like nothing but drops in the ocean.

I know I have.

It was December 15, 2013. That was the day when everything changed, when her life came to an end, and many other lives were changed forever.

When they first told me she was gone, I couldn’t fully grasp reality. For a …

You’ll Never Be “Ready,” So Stop Waiting

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“It’s a terrible thing, I think, in life to wait until you’re ready.” ~Hugh Laurie

Throughout our childhood and early adult years, we’re conditioned to think we need to be “ready” to take the next big step in life.

Our teachers won’t let us get too far ahead of where they think we should be in terms of knowledge.

Our parents try to protect us from ideas and truths they think we’re not ready to learn about.

We, ourselves, hold back when faced with major decisions that we don’t believe we’re ready to make.

We’re constantly told we’ll understand certain …

Happiness Hacks: 10 Ways to Infuse Your Life with Joy

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“There is no way to happiness. Happiness is the way.” ~Thich Nhat Hanh

Life seems complicated these days.

We’re all busy pursuing happiness, yet how many of us ever reach that goal?

Success, money, and busyness are top of our priority list, yet deep in our hearts we’d prefer time, love, and security.

It’s the age of making a living, but perhaps at the cost of making a life.

What really makes us happy, and how do we find it?

I spent many years trying to fit in, to be someone else, to pursue the dream of success, in …

10 Ways to Lift Your Spirits When You’re Having a Tough Week

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“True happiness is born of letting go of what is unnecessary.” ~Sharon Salzberg

You are exhausted. Every force in the universe seems to be conspiring against you.

You pick yourself up just to be knocked down again by more bad news.

It’s not fair!

You want to crawl in bed and wait for the week to be over.

But you know you can’t hide.

Sometimes our lives get tough. It happens to all of us. You know things will eventually get better, but it’s hard to get through a ruthless week in one piece.

When you are having a …

Why We Worry About What Other People Think of Us (And How to Stop)

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“When I look back on all these worries, I remember the story of the old man who said on his deathbed that he had had a lot of trouble in his life, most of which had never happened.” ~Winston Churchill

I often play a little game with myself when I’m feeling bad. The game is a simple one, and maybe one that some people might find slightly morbid, but it cuts to the heart of the matter.

I ask myself if this thing that is making me feel bad will matter to me when I’m on my deathbed. Ninety-nine …

How to Transform Your Body by Coming from Love Instead of Fear

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“Fear is the opposite of everything you are, and so has an effect of opposition to your mental and physical health.” ~Neale Donald Walsch

My initial foray into health and fitness started from a deep place of fear.

I feared my weight and my appearance, always wondering what new trend I’d encounter in a magazine or on social media that would point out the latest way I was inadequate.

I feared the big health scares that we’re told could kill us at any moment if we aren’t careful. Diabetes. High blood pressure. Cancer.

Many of us have all been on …

10 Things to Remember When You Feel Lost and Alone

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“Accept what is, let go of what was, and have faith in what will be.” ~Sonia Ricotti

I would lie awake at night aching for rest and relief from my racing mind. Hot milk with honey, yoga postures with my feet above my head, no chocolate after three in the afternoon—I had tried it all.

I was weaning myself off sleeping pills. Wrenching myself from my love affair with the tiny white disc. I’d pop it under my tongue to slide from the shackles of adrenaline. They felt impossible to escape.

I’d started using sleeping pills in my last semester …

How to Make a Hard Change and Avoid Future Regrets

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“If you do tomorrow what you did today, you will get tomorrow what you got today.” ~Benjamin Franklin

If you want change, it has to come from inside. You can’t rely on someone or something to change you; you have to do it yourself.

However, it’s one thing to want it, but it’s another to actually do it. That’s the hard part—doing it. Change can be hard.

But there’s a technique to get yourself to take action to make a change. It’s simple, and truly powerful.

A Technique to Get Yourself to Make a Change

It’s just a matter …

How to Change Your Life When It Feels Like Nothing is Going Your Way

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“The rose is a rose from the time it is a seed to the time it dies. Within it, at all times, it contains its whole potential. It seems to be constantly in the process of change; yet at each state, at each moment, it is perfectly all right as it is.” ~Timothy Gallwey

Have you ever wanted something so desperately that you became devastated after many failed attempts to get it?

Has the same pattern kept repeating itself no matter how you tried to change it?

Have you ever longed for something so deeply that you lost interest in …

Why Happiness Means Letting Go of the Life You Imagined

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“Happiness is letting go of what you think your life is supposed to look like and celebrating it for everything that it is.” ~Mandy Hale

As a child, you imagine (with much excitement!) the life that you are determined to have as you grow up.

The life that you are meant to have.

We have expectations. Lots of them. Only reality doesn’t always quite match up.

Life twists and turns, changing direction to forge new paths, and things happen that don’t match the idealized playbook in our head.

Some of these things are good; some are not so good.…

3 Ways You May Be Undermining Your Self-Worth (And How to Stop)

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“You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection.” ~Buddha

Self-worth comes from knowing that you are enough, just as you are. You are inherently worthy, and you don’t need anyone else’s approval.

I didn’t always hold myself in high regard, or treat myself with the respect I deserved. I’m now in my thirties and live a beautiful life filled with self-love, kindness, and passion, but in my younger years I suffered from low self-worth.

I had my fair share of life lessons and allowed myself to be treated poorly.

I begged for …

How to Have a Peaceful Mother’s Day with a Difficult Mother

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“I’d rather be honest and authentic and disappoint some people than to exhaust myself trying to keep up the facade of perfection.” ~Crystal Paine

“You’re the Best Mom Ever!”

Nope.

“You’ve always listened, loved, and let me lean on you.”

Not really.

For most of my adult life, every year before Mother’s Day I stood in front of a beautiful display of cards fairly bursting with love, and tried to find one that my authentic self would allow me to give my mother, and that my mother would be pleased enough with that the day would be calm and …

Finding Freedom in Illness: A Guide to Suffering Less When Sick (Interview & Giveaway)

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UPDATE: The winners for this giveaway include:

  • Naomi
  • KC
  • Lisa Pellegrino
  • Caroline LĂ©tourneau
  • Viktor Dmitriv
  • Kristin Kollinger
  • Heather S
  • Erica Lombard
  • Christine
  • Bridget Howe

If you’ve ever been sick for a prolonged period of time, you understand how physically, mentally, and emotionally draining it can be.

Maybe you don’t know what’s causing your illness, or how to treat it, and you’re tired of searching for answers.

Maybe you blame yourself for repressing emotions, not exercising, or otherwise potentially causing your condition; or maybe you don’t hold yourself responsible, but fear that others do.

Maybe you can no longer do the …

You Are Not for Everyone, and That’s Okay

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“One of the most freeing things we learn in life is that we don’t have to like everyone, everyone doesn’t have to like us, and it’s perfectly okay.” –Unknown

I grew up a people pleaser. It was drilled into me from childhood that it was very important to be aware of what other people thought of me and my actions at all times. Growing up in the south, keeping up with appearances is something that becomes a part of your identity.

While I enjoy the part of Southern upbringing that taught me to always be polite, the part …

5 Reasons You Feel Alone (And How to Change That)

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“Two possibilities exist: either we are alone in the Universe or we are not. Both are equally terrifying.” ~Arthur C. Clarke

“You are not alone” is a phrase we speak, hear, and read over and over again.

Testimony and statistics prove that others have lived our types of misfortune. Given that evidence, why is it that so many of us feel as if we are somehow different than all the others who have triumphed over tragedy or are climbing those proverbial mountains?

The seed was first planted ages ago when I was having a conversation with a loved one during …

When It’s Time to Let Go: The Freedom of Accepting What Can’t Be Changed

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“When one door of happiness closes, another opens, but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one that has been opened for us.” ~Helen Keller

Years ago, a friend had a small party for her son’s fifth birthday. I was expecting to spend most of the party talking to the other adults. But that’s not what happened. Instead, at the insistence of my friend’s son, I spent most of the party entertaining him and the other children.

Occasionally, I would escape to the living room to talk to the other adults. But …

Overcoming General and Social Anxiety: There is Hope

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“F-E-A-R has two meanings: ‘Forget Everything And Run’ or ‘Face Everything And Rise.’ The choice is yours.” ~Zig Ziglar

“Face everything and rise.” Good advice, but how do we do that when we feel incapable? Well, I recently discovered an effective tool that we can rely on whenever anxiety comes for a visit. And I just can’t describe how grateful I am for that discovery!

For over ten years I’ve been suffering from general and social anxiety. People who don’t know me well would be surprised to hear that, since I became a master of hiding my feelings. But when …