“Stay committed in your decisions, but stay flexible in your approach.” ~Tom Robbins
This is the post that almost wasn’t—and it’s chock full of irony.
This weekend I spoke at the first annual Bonfire Heights retreat.
The founder, Darius, promoted this event as a meeting of “ordinary people doing extraordinary things.” Listening to the stories presenters shared, it occurred to me that “ordinary” was a modest assessment. The lineup included the youngest TED speaker ever—a twelve-year old organic farmer; a teenage paraplegic who started a non-profit foundation called Walk and Roll; and multiple CNN Heroes, to name just a few individuals.
But it wasn’t just their messages that stirred me—it was their humanity. Since this was the first event of its kind, the crowd was relatively small, which allowed for an intimate experience. From community style meals, to S’mores around the bonfire, to impromptu nighttime beach walks, it felt like a family reunion. It felt like love was the only agenda.
Yesterday, I planned to write during several hours at the airport, since I hadn’t yet prepared a post for today. But I found myself instead immersed in a fascinating conversation about psychology with a new friend.
At first I resisted somewhat, since there was all kinds of inspiration percolating in my brain, waiting to be expressed in written words. I also knew I’d likely be exhausted by the time I got home. I have written every week day for more than two years. Not doing it just wasn’t an option.
Until it was.
My boyfriend would attest that Tiny Buddha has been the other man in my life. All my heart and soul are wrapped up in this site, and I generally make it my first priority. But in this moment, I decided being was more important than sharing. And I gave myself permission to take a day off from what I always do.
Of course I woke up at 7:30, fired up to share. But I’m happy to sit here knowing that I do this because I want to; not because I have to.
Sometimes the best way to stay consistent is to release that sense of urgency.
Photo by geishaboy500
About Lori Deschene
Lori Deschene is the founder of Tiny Buddha. She started the site after struggling with depression, bulimia, c-PTSD, and toxic shame so she could recycle her former pain into something useful and inspire others to do the same. You can find her books, including Tiny Buddha’s Gratitude Journal and Tiny Buddha’s Worry Journal, here and learn more about her eCourse, Recreate Your Life Story, if you’re ready to transform your life and become the person you want to be.
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Though I run this site, it is not mine. It's ours. It's not about me. It's about us. Your stories and your wisdom are just as meaningful as mine. 
[…] saw John speak this weekend at Bonfire Heights, the retreat I mentioned yesterday. His father, Irv Robbins, co-founded the ice cream company Baskin Robbins, and lived a life […]
[…] saw John speak this weekend at Bonfire Heights, the retreat I mentioned yesterday. His father, Irv Robbins, co-founded the ice cream company Baskin Robbins, and lived a life […]
I just posted on my own blog this morning about the same thing. I was reflecting on summer and realized that I gave up the the long lists of to do’s, and just concentrated on being. Low and behold…the summer seemed longer and larger than life. I think it’s good to jump off the wheel once in a while….it does the spirit good….opens the eyes. I like your style…and enjoyed this post and the many others your share here. Thank you.
perfect! Many times, BEING is more important than DOING. Awesome!
Your site is of deep importance to me and I feel certain to other readers as well. I believe what I’ve read in today’s insight is that you have found a balance between BEING and DOING; something that we all have a need to aspire to. How often my BEING is judged by my feelings that I must be DOING setting me off onto the terrible shoulds. Thank you for this delightful reminder!
That is awesome. Give yourself permission to do what you want to do in all situations. You can really tell you pour yourself into the site.
Just don’t take too many days off, we’ll miss you!
This is a fantastic post and the links are so inspiring! Even a little humor. Thanks for what you do!
love every word Lori! just think you are fantastic. and I GET TO MEET YOU SOON.
love love love the video. you have a total fan in me my dear.
xo, laura
It’s so funny to read this post today. I gave myself a time out just a few days ago – in fact, I took 3 days. And I clearly needed it. There was some guilt at first but now, I’m so glad I did it. 🙂
Creativity has a natural ebb and flow. You cannot sustain a high level of output all the time. Sometimes you need to take a break and allow silence, allow space and time to fill up the creative well. It’s important to remember to be a humanBEING, not just a human DOING.
I enjoy your blog, BTW. 🙂
Ha! I just read the other comments. After mine posted. Apparently the universe is sending you a message loud & clear! *wink*
congratulations on stepping away and letting go!!! i had a similar experience this summer at the wanderlust festival in vermont – couldn’t wait to blog away about my experience, but decided to just BE instead. Some things need to be reserved just for us. I am, however, glad you choose to share so much with us… your blog is a daily source of inspiration. thank you for sharing your beautiful spirit with us. xo
I went to the Wanderlust Festival in Tahoe. It was such a fantastic event! Thank you for your kind words. They mean a lot to me. =)
Yes, you bring up a great point about creativity. I find that when I give myself some space, writing actually flows much more smoothly.
Me, too! We had such a wonderful conversation. Sometimes it feels like letting go of control when I fall out of my routine or plans. This is something I work at–going with the flow and enjoying it!
And I get to meet you! I am looking forward to it. =)
Thank you Tess. =) There were so many inspiring people there. I will be writing about it all week, likely!
You’re most welcome, Karena. Thank you! I love how you phrased it–that it does the spirit good and opens the eyes. That’s definitely how it feels for me.
You are most welcome. I find that balance is a lesson I need to learn and apply over and over again. Letting go of the “shoulds” helps a great deal!
Thanks Fred. I won’t take too many days off–this is home! =)
I guess you can spend so much time painting tiny details, but it can never really make sense until you take a step back and look at the big picture.
Beautiful =)
Lovely .. sounds like shedding another layer of ‘shoulds’ and ‘musts’ .. and finding again the choosing in the moment .. the love, rather than the fear .. the flow and the ebb :o)
Yes, absolutely! It’s funny how those “shoulds” pop up. Lately I’ve been using the mantra “be easy” (from a post someone contributed earlier in the year) and it reminds me to take the pressure off myself and go with the flow.