I agree that in social situations it is important to control anger and other emotions especially since sometimes anger leads to bad confrontations. if someone makes you angry, look away from them and lower your voice, deal you business listening to both sides then walk away an put your anger to good use such as working out. i also agree that not everyone is nice, but it is our attitude that is important. we can’t live without fear since fear also helps us in the way that it keeps us safe such as most people wouldn’t want to go rock climbing without a safety harness, but it’s the attitude that we have with fear that counts. we can let our fear and anger limit us from our dreams or when can try to overcome our obstacles. there are people who are successful who are miserable, but their are people who do simple jobs who are happy. you wouldn’t be said to be having a life if you did something that made you miserable, even if you made a living. i have wanted to be athletic since seventh grade when i was bullied for athleticism, but once i achieved it, i still didn’t think i was perfect b/c i wanted to be smarter. we can’t keep changing ourselves for the better when we feel insecure on the inside. my inner bully often makes situations worse than they really are and often makes me irritated at myself, but what the inner bully thinks often isn’t what the world sees me as. i want to find a way to live happily on the inside, then when i feel happy on the inside i can reflect it on the outside.

I agree that most people don’t have a specifically designed career for them. people’s interest change from time to time and also the economy also changes. i have been doing ‘achieving my goals’ meditation and i find it has helped a lot. the guided meditations take you into a trance where you release anything negative that has been holding you back either from other people or by yourself. i often find myself calmer and more focused on my goals without having to wrestle with an inner bully. mercury turns retrograde today and there is a solar eclipse 9/1. i love the universe and the surprises never end:D there are no words to describe the beauty of the universe and nature. i think on my free time from being a molecular biologist, i will be out in nature studying environmental things and also studying astronomy. science has some stuff that corrupts such as the changing genes of children to make children perfect in parents’ eyes, but on the bright side, a child with a disease gene can be changed. so there is always a positive and negative side. i also find that i like spending time with adults and the elderly more than teenagers b/c the adults are more mature and the elderly teach me about the importance of life. volunteering at nursing homes and helping the elderly with a craft makes me realize that the simplest things in life are often the most meaningful and shouldn’t be taken for granted. just to see the sun rise in the morning and having people there to care for you is great. some of the hurtful bullying that i’ve received has mostly been from teens. some of the girls don’t like that i enjoy sports, some of the guys don’t think i’m athletic enough. i remember one of the hurtful comments one teen said to me “you could be a great athlete if you only worked out harder and didn’t have your head in the books.” i tend to balance both athletics and academics and i do it pretty well, but my main goal is to go for academics.

also i learned not to be so self-conscious of myself from Portia de Rossi’s book called “Unbearable Loss and Gain” which is the true story of an actress who struggles with her body and ends up accepting herself. Portia talks about how as a teen, she hated being called average or normal b/c everyone in her family had many accomplishments such as being a doctor or being pretty. At first she wanted to be a lawyer, but her aunt and mom (portia’s dad died when she was young) liked Allison best b/c she was a model. Portia began to think she should also be a model as well and have people admire her. Portia never liked the modeling business, but she enjoyed acting so she decided to give it a shot. While modeling, Portia faced many letdowns from the people in the modeling business such as that she was a size eight and her stomach was too big and also her thighs. at 5′ 7” inches and 130, portia didn’t think she would be a good model. however, the pressure of the achievements and the interest of wanting to be recognized lead her to try. she hired a nutritionist, suzzane to help her diet and it worked, but portia began changing her diet to only 1,000 calories to speed her weight loss instead of the healthy 1,400. she kept a false diary to give to suzanne and a real diary to count her calories. when she felt that wasn’t enough, she began to lower her calorie intake to 800, to 400 and finally 300. she went from 130 to 110 to 105. every day she would keep index cards and work on losing 1-3 pounds until she was 105, a good weight. she was able to fit in a size six and was the envy of other models, but she still felt it wasn’t enough. she began to work out on the treadmill often counting her portions of food, afraid of even chewing gum would put 60 calories on her. she went to 95 pounds to 82 pounds and was quite happy with herself when she could fit into a size two. suzanne was worried about her and gave her a book called “The Beauty Myth” in which explains the myths of beauty for girls, but portia only thought she was fat. when her best friend sasha rejected her b/c she found out portia was gay (only portia’s mom knew and told portia not to tell anyone for fear of ruining her career), portia was even more in despair. anyway, suzanne called portia’s mom and told her about it. anyway, portia’s brother was also worried about her and followed her to her gym one day and when she was finished with her workout. her brother broke down and said “portia, you have to stop. you’re too thin. you’re going to die.” portia broke down, not b/c of her brother’s words, but b/c she cared about her brother so she lied and said she would gain weight, but she continued in the same way. portia would look at herself in the mirror and would think “sometimes i saw a young girl without curves or a young boy without his manhood that he would always have to measure, but i felt content to be at 82.” anyway, portia ended collapsing when she was in the middle of a scene production of ally mcbeal where she was taken to the hospital and the doctor said her electrolyte levels were low and her organs were in danger of failing and that she had lupus. the doctor prescribed portia with a diet and told her to rest for a while. while resting, the voice in her head kept telling her “get on the treadmill. you’re fat.” she was arguing with the voice saying “i can’t i’m sick. i have lupus.” the voice said “you are nothing but a pathetic loser, you were never a model.” portia told the voice “go to hell.” the silence in her head brought her relief and she realized that it was over, that it was done she would accept herself.
anyway, while modeling, portia also had doubts about herself such as her acne and when she went to a support group to help her accept herself, she told them she didn’t like anything about herself. there were times when portia didn’t want to model b/c she didn’t like the constant pressure of being beautiful and skinny. at first, she was bingeing and then she decided to get a nutritionist and anorexia crept up on her. yet she was able to recover fully. she also met ellen degeneres who loved her just as she was. after she gained her weight back to 130 again, she realized she didn’t care anymore about her weight.
like portia, i like acting and i don’t like being a model at all. i would have gone for the lawyer job if i was her in the book. portia says the one thing she hates about being an actor is that there is no privacy from photographers which is why i don’t want to be an actor. i think portia only wanted to feel accepted and be perfect that is why she decided to go for acting and modeling. she had been entranced at the way actors and actresses seem to catch the people’s eyes. also she wanted to be appreciated and be more than average. when she was young, her name was amanda rogers and there was another girl on her track team that was also amanda rogers and portia (formerly amanda) made third place. she could have made second, but she thought it was weird that there would be an amanda rogers one in first and the other in second, so she made third instead. she didn’t like her name b/c she felt it was too average and too normal. this book reminds me of the song by meghan trainor called “All about that bass” in which it says ‘i see the magazines, working the photoshop we know that ain’t real make it stop. every inch of you is perfect from the bottom to the top.” the song talks about appreciating yourself for who you are and not what you look like, true beauty is on the inside not outside. it also says “i won’t be no stick figure or silicone barbie doll, if that’s what you’re into go ahead and move along.” portia also found hard to tell her brother she was gay even though she trusted him with many things, but when she told him, he still cared about her. also i think since beauty can be seen is why people like models, but intelligence and the inner spirit is felt with the heart. i like people who have an inner confidence and an inner beauty that makes them courageous through aspects of life. true courage isn’t about showing of your talents, it’s about being able to be strong whatever life throws at you. true inner beauty is when you are happy just being yourself and radiate the confidence.

only 10 days till school starts and i feel a bit restless and nervous. i am so excited and also nervous about doing well in my classes. i wonder if i my guidance counselor will think i’m dumb b/c the application process is a bit confusing.

here is a quote i wrote inspired by a friend’s quote:

Friend’s quote: “Never live life suffering from Depravity, for the soul that is afraid to Die, is the soul that never learns to Live.” – Melthan.

Mine: “What a shame it is for a person to die without knowing the endurance of his human spirit and to only focus on the materialness and strength of his physical body. The whole world is full of everybody else, but few realize their true selves.”

what do you think of the name of cytele? looking back at freshman year, i’m surprised at the names i used for the characters and i also have a great sense of humor and imagery in my writing. i used her as one of my characters. forensics project:

i’m putting all my good essays on this site b/c it will be easier to navigate them and access them when i need them, hope you don’t mind.

Special Agent
By Shirley

In the fictional novel, Jigsaw Jones Mysteries Volume One, by James Preller; a detective, Mila Yeh, is a cryptographer (person who works with codes). Mila sends messages to Theodore Jones (Jigsaw) in code. She is the brain that helps Jigsaw solve his cases. The codes she writes and deciphers often helps them both solve a case. Those labeled Jigsaw are the codes Mila has to decipher from her friend. Here are the codes they write to each other:
The Case of Hermie the Missing Hamster/ Mila’s code <20-8-9-19*9-19*1*6-1-11-5*3-12-21-5.>
Substitution Code>
1. Write out the alphabet.
2. Write the numbers one to twenty-six under each letter.
3. They work in pairs.
4. Each number in the code stands for a letter.
5. This is a fake clue. {Solved Code]

The Case of the Spooky Sleepover / Jigsaw’s code< ME ETMEA TTHETRE EHOU SEAAFTERSC HOOL.>
Space Code-
1. Find the real words.
2. Separate them with a /.
3. ME ET/ ME/ A T/ THE/ TRE E/ HOU SE/ AFTER/ SC HOOL.
The Case of the Stolen Baseball Cards/ Jigsaw’s code
Alternate Letter Code>
1. Cross out every other letter.
2. MQEWERTY MUEP ASTA TFHJEL OMFBFCIZCTEI ALFKTHEDRR SXCVHZOKOPL.
3. The red letters are the letters that are crossed out.
4. MEET ME AT THE OFFICE AFTER SCHOOL.
The Case of the Mummy Mystery/Mila’s code< blue the witch candy purple mummy and tall man green is like door monster red going brown to trick treat orange get black you! Color Code- 1. The only that matter are the ones that come after the color words. 2. Circle the color words. 3. Underline the words that are next in line. 4. blue the witch candy purple mummy and tall man green is like door monster red going brown to trick treat orange get black you! Eyewitness Challenge Shirley: The perpetrator was a female. Le: A box of safety matches was taken. Parents: The suspect had curly, brown hair and appeared to be 37 years old. Mom: She was wearing white-rimmed sunglasses (on her head), a blue sweatshirt, and Nike shoes. Common Tells in Poker “I have a good hand.” 1. Acting Uninterested in a Hand While Still in It: player is acting as if not excited about his/her cards, but is. 2. Shaking Hands: if you notice a player’s hands shaking as she/he places a bet, she/he possibly has a really, really good hand. 3. Glancing at Chips After Looking at Hole Cards: when a player looks down and sees a strong hole, she/he may glance over at his/her chips to see how much she can bet. “I have a drawing hand.” 1. Checking Hole Cards After a Flop: watch for the player to recheck his/her cards, they’re checking whether that black Ace was a spade or a club. 2. Taking a Long Time Before Calling a Bet: if a player seems to be doing some mental calculations, he/she is most likely figuring if the pot odds are in his/her favor. My common tells in poker: 1. Taking a long time before calling a bet. 2. Checking hole cards after a flop. Newfound knowledge can help me make them less obvious. I could possibly pull off false tells. Forensic- Science Drama The Case of Johnson Murder Characters: Setting: Saturday afternoon in Detective Alex Mr. Johnson’s house on Green Police Haven St. Thomas Johnson (Mr. Johnson’s son) Dale Gregory (suspect) Dan Teller (found guilty) Scene 1 Act 1 Police: What did you say happened in 234 Green Haven St. at 4 yesterday, Alex? Alex: On Friday at 4:30, I heard a scream from Mr. Johnson’s house. I checked the next morning and saw in the living room Richard Johnson lying dead with a knife in his heart. Police: Did you get a good look at the suspect? Alex (shaking his head): It was too dark to see anything, but he/she might have left fingerprints. Police: Very well, let’s have a look. Alex leads them into the living room Police: I don’t see any fingerprints. Alex nods, then notices holes in the backyard. Alex (to the police): Look! The suspect must have been walking on stilts. Police: That’s a mighty clever suspect/s. A sudden clang followed by footsteps makes them jump .A figure appears in the doorway, he looks at Alex and the police in puzzlement. Thomas Johnson: Who are you? What are you doing here? Police and Alex: We’re Detective Alex and police. Who are you? Thomas Johnson (states his name): I’m Richard’s son. Alex and the police exchange looks of excitement. Police (to Thomas): Did you see the suspect that killed your father? Thomas: I got a glimpse of him under the full moon. Alex and police (breathless with excitement): What did you see? Thomas: Not much. He was 5’’ 7’ and wore a blue cape with black rubber boots. Alex: Wow! That is the best clue to solving this mystery. Police: We’re very sorry about your father, Thomas; perhaps you could help with burial. Alex and Thomas: Not now, we’ve a mystery to solve. Police: I’ve got a computer for research. I’ll type in the given information and see the results. Five minutes later… Police: I’ve got it! (He shows Alex and Thomas the data) Alex (reviewing the information): Looks like Dale Gregory’s our best suspect. They go to Dale’s house. Dale denies everything and the lie detectors prove he is not lying. Dale: I had nothing to do with Richard Johnson; I am great friends with him. However, I know the suspect had brown hair and green eyes. I believe it to be the work of Dan Teller. Police: Where does he live? Dale: 454 Red Nut Dr. Police and Alex: Thanks. Alex (to police and Thomas): This case is tiresome. Police and Thomas: Yeah, it is. Let’s hope the next is guilty. They arrive at Dan Teller’s house. Police interrogate Dan Teller. He is found guilty. Alex, the police, and Thomas: Whew! Mystery solved. English I Honors/Original Myth April 7, 2014 Memory: Princess Destroyed by Pride On Herringsworn, an island in the mid-atlantic, there resided King Whit and his nymph wife, Reason. They had a beautiful daughter with auburn hair and green eyes called Memory. Memory was excellent at remembering and analyzing information. King Whit and Queen Reason were very vain about their daughter. King Whit and his nymph wife, Reason wanted Memory to have the best husband. King Whit consulted an oracle who told him, “You’re daughter will live a long and joyous life as long as she doesn’t know pride.” King Whit did not think this was a bad fate and told his wife. When Memory reached sixteen, a contest was set in place to determine who her suitor would be. Hundreds flocked to Herringsworn like migrating birds to win the favor of the beautiful princess. The king told his daughter that she could choose whatever test she desired. Memory chose an IQ test. The test involved mostly memorization and analyzing data. The suitors were no match for the princess and lost their lives. All around the world, many men tried and failed to claim Memory for their wife. King Whit and his wife were despondent, but Memory, in her heart was glad. She did not want to marry any of the suitors; she dreamed of a day when women could make their choices when and who to marry. Then, one day Memory arrogantly declared “I am smarter than even the wisdom goddess, Athena. Athena became fiercely angry and called her friend, Allison, Goddess of Revenge to punish Memory. Allison killed Memory’s parents, but even though she was grief-stricken, Memory refused to recant her words. Seething, Athena turned Memory into a computer that stores information and can analyze data, but does not boast. The data storage in a computer called random access memory is derived from her name. It is often said that when the computer freezes, it is Memory trying to free herself from her computer transformation. She has never succeeded and mankind still uses Memory to store data. Shirley Liu June 18, 2014 English II Honors Summer Reading The Martian Chronicles by Ray Bradbury Closed Reading Journal- Major idea/Conflict Quotes: o March 2000- “Don’t leave me here on this terrible world, I’ve got to get away; there’s going to be an atom war! Don’t leave me on Earth!” (Bradbury 32) Significance- Bradbury is foreshadowing the destruction of Earth by nuclear weapons. The taxpayer wants to board the fourth expedition to Mars, but the crew will not let him. They tell him that the other three flights had failed and he does not want to go. The taxpayer does not want to be left behind and keeps imploring. Those who could went to Mars and those who could not perished on Earth. o February 2002- “And from the rockets ran men with hammers in their hands to beat the strange world into a shape that was familiar to the eye.” (Bradbury 78) Significance- The men did not like the crystal pillars which were formed with both religion and science and they destroyed the Martians’ artwork. The Earth men had long relied on science to explain the laws of the universe and could not comprehend religion and science coexisting. When rational, scientific views were introduced, and proven, the Earth men ceased to have faith in idolatry. The Earth men forgot about the old names and figures, but gave the names to the places on Mars based from the ones on Earth. o November 2005- “Across town there was a rocket port. You could still smell the hard, scorched smell where the last rocket blasted off when it went back to Earth.” (Bradbury 146) Significance- The men wanted to go back to Earth to see their families and partake in the war. The men had all been trying to get away from Earth because of the atomic war. They had begun to worry about their families. After receiving a radio message from Earth, telling them to come home, the people left for Earth. The only people left behind were Walter Gripp and Genevieve Selsor whom Walter left after a few minutes of meeting because of her messy hair, sticky, chocolate covered hands and immature behavior toward him. Central Characters: o “It was just the idea of them watching us make fools of ourselves. The Martians dead or not. Doesn’t an old thing always know when a new thing arrives? “(Bradbury 54) Significance- Spender believes that the spirits of the Martians are still there. He does not like the crew getting rowdy drunk and acting like fools. In his conversation with the Captain Wilder, Spender tells him that he became angry and killed six of the men from the fourth expedition. Spender could not kill the captain because the captain seemed so much like himself in another view. Both the captain and Spender wanted to protect Mars from being overrun by science much like Earth had been. o August 2002- “Who wants to see the future, who ever does? A man can face the past, but to think- the pillars crumbled, you say? But there they are. I see them.” (Bradbury 86) Significance- Muhe Ca, a Martian is telling Tomas Gomez (Earth man) that the Martian cities are alive and that the pillars are upright. The Martian thinks Tomas is talking about the future or the past and tells Tomas that he could face the past with the pillars crumbled. Tomas keeps saying that the Martians are from the past, that they are not alive after the chicken pox epidemic, but Muhe Ca keeps denying it. Muhe Ca sees the city in perfection and the Martians are going to have a feast. o November 2005- “Prepare your place of food. One hundred thousand miles of territory is all yours. Tonight is indeed a great night. There’s more, half of Mars is also yours.” (Bradbury 141) Significance- The Martians were very forgiving and accepting people. They let Sam Parkhill, the Earth man claim all their territory. Even though, Sam did not like the Martians and killed some of them, the Martian leader issued that all the land should be his. Parkhill is the literary foil of Spender because unlike Spender who wants to preserve the beauty of Mars, Parkhill uses his shotgun to shatter all the crystal pillars of the Martian cities. Parkhill also sets up a hotdog stand and anticipates customers, but none come because they are busy with the war on Earth. Character Comparison: Sam Parkhill is similar to Hitler. Hitler was a dictator of Nazi Germany from 1933-1945. As Hitler did not like the Jews, Parkhill was prejudiced against the Martians. In Kristallnacht (Night of Broken Glass), on November 9-10 of 1938, the Nazis set fire to Jewish synagogues and the Gestapo brought Jews to their headquarters to be sent to concentration camps. Parkhill destroyed the Martian crystal cities by using them as target practice for his shooting. Parkhill wanted to take over Mars and did not want the Martians in his way. Similarly, Hitler wanted a fascist Germany with a perfect Aryan race and those who stood in his way were killed. Political opponents such as the Soviet communists and Jews were thrown into concentration camps such as Auschwitz. Opinion of novel: The Martian Chronicles was an entertaining and engaging novel. Ray Bradbury illustrated the Earth men conquering Mars after Earth was destroyed. The book explains how nuclear technology went too far, leading to the destruction of Earth by an atomic bomb. The most enjoyed chapter was “April 2000: The Third Expedition.” On the third expedition led by Captain John Black, the crew landed on Mars and saw their hometown Green Bluff, Illinois during 1926. The crew thinks they have gone back in time because they see their dead relatives alive. Captain Black is suspicious and thinks it is the Martians disguising themselves as their relatives. He believes that the Martians used their telepathic powers to create the scene from the thoughts in the men’s minds. Captain Black believes the Martians are planning to kill them. He tries to escape to warn the others during the night, but his long-deceased brother, Edward awakens and kills him. This chapter explains that you should not always believe everything you see. The Earth men were fooled into thinking that they were on Mars with their dead relatives, and they were elated to see them; but they were really Martians in disguise. At the end of the novel, the Earth men go back to Earth to be with their families and take part in the war. Only a few people were left behind on Mars including Tomas Gomez and his family, Genevieve Selsor, and Walter Gripp. All in all, this was an amazing novel. Bomb Race to Build-and Steal- the World’s Most Dangerous Weapon By Steve Sheinkin Character Comparison: Klaus Fuchs is like Harriet in the novel Harriet the Spy. Klaus is a German physicist who was recruited by the British to help assemble the atomic bomb. Like Harriet, Klaus was a quiet outcast who was a spy. Klaus provided the Soviet Union with information about the Manhattan Project, the project to build an atomic bomb. Most of the Americans liked Klaus; they believed he had left the communist life behind in Germany. When the Americans found out about the Soviet atomic bomb; they found telegrams sent from America by Soviet agents. The Soviets were not worried, but the Americans deciphered their code. It was discovered that the 1994 telegram had a top-secret paper written by Klaus Fuchs. Similar to when Marion got her hands on Harriet’s private notebook and spills the secrets to the whole school, Harriet gets in trouble; the British intelligence was notified by FBI intelligence, Robert Lamphere about Klaus spying. When the Americans find out, they gave Klaus imprisonment for fourteen years. Opinion of novel: Bomb by Steve Sheinkin was an interesting novel of atomic physics. The German physicist, Otto Hahn used uranium (chemical symbol: U) atoms and they watched what happened when they were placed near radioactive isotope, U-235: element that has an unstable nucleus and neutrons flying around in its outer shell. The result was shocking, the U-235 nucleus split called nuclear fission. When American scientists realized that nuclear fission would release a tremendous amount of energy and when placed in a chain reaction; it would create an atomic bomb. The Americans quickly began recruiting scientists to build an atomic bomb before the Germans- their enemy in World War II. There was a lot of suspense in the novel. When Robert Oppenheimer (leader of the Manhattan Project- secret project in Manhattan, NYC to build atomic bomb) realized, uranium 235 was hard to manufacture quickly and the Americans wanted more than one bomb, they decided to bombard uranium atoms with two isotopes of hydrogen creating plutonium. The race to build the bomb became intense when the United States discovered that Germany had a uranium supply and heavy water- water consisting of a proton and neutron to cause a chain reaction. The British, allies of the Americans sent Knut Haukelid (Norwegian) to destroy the heavy water plant in Vemork, Norway. Steve Sheinkin was very descriptive when he said the bomb created a ball of fire that went from orange to purple to black and spread like a mushroom cloud over the Trinity site in Los Alamos, NM where the first plutonium bomb was tested. Cosmic Alignment Discovering my soul’s true purpose Awakening to divine love and healing Breaking the illusions No longer confined by the walls of limitations Accepting myself and my talents Forgetting all I’m lacking I breathe the divine in At peace with my life I’m running and quite sure where to go The world illuminated in a new light Detached from material wants and pressures I am free I am alive My inner self becoming more vibrant, taking the path of spiritual fulfillment I’m going home I’m going to the place I belong I’m one with the divine, at peace, filled with love and light. Life is a miracle Living isn’t hard at all It doesn’t matter who you’re not, it matters who you are and how you use it So don’t bring yourself down if others seem better than you You have your talents as well I know what I believe inside I’m awake and I’m alive Wherever I go, whatever I experience I’ll be okay Filled with divine light and love, life is effortless Life is beautiful Live every moment to the fullest If you are angry, there are other people out there who have it worse than you or the person who made you angry is out there dancing So release your worry, doubt and anger; it only wastes your energy in life and takes away the precious seconds when you could be happy Live as if you were too die this moment Be happy with who you are, embrace life cause you can’t rewind a moment in this life Be one with the divine, be one with yourself Experience life as a miracle, don’t live with regrets, they only hold you back Free your soul, free your heart and soar, align yourself to the path of your true purpose. Haikus Late for Class Bells ring for first class Students hurry in the hall Late to class again Summer Scorching heat from sun “School’s out!” The children shout. Popsicles dripping. Sunset Sky of bright colors The sun’s red shadow sets To rise another day I’d Live for the Moment (freshman poetry book) If I had my life to live over, I’d believe in myself more I would not let myself get depressed I would be more expressive of myself and stop letting other people take advantage of me I would stop letting other people put me down Oh I’ve had my moments and, If I had to do it over, I’d have more of them. In fact, I’d try to go after my dreams despite obstacles Just moments, one after another, instead of caring what others think of me If I had to do it over again, I would go dance like no one’s watching If I had to live my life over, I would love like I’ve never been hurt I would worry less I’d be less hard on myself. Radioactive questions and Explosive answers were titles to a project.

about the college essay, i have been drafting it a few sentences at a time, just letting the natural flow of words flow out of my heart like i do with my poetry. i have decided to do the essay called “How the Blog Changed my Life” and i have added a few details on paper. the few sentences that i have posted are on page 37 on August 19, 2016 at 9:53 am. i have senior year and also 2 years at a community college that doesn’t require an essay, but rutgers does and looking up the essay topics, they are pretty straightforward. i think my essay would fall under “What is the hardest part of being a teenager now? What’s the best part? What advice would you give a younger sibling or friend (assuming they would listen to you)?”
or “Tell a story from your life, describing an experience that either demonstrates your character or helped to shape it.” or

• Describe a time you made a meaningful contribution to others in which the greater good was your focus. Discuss the challenges and rewards of making your contribution.

i agree that the brain develops and learns from childhood experiences and having a different lifestyle would change one’s personality, maybe that will also be part of my essay. that who i am not only has been shaped by the words i write here, but also by my parents. i’m finding that i have a lot of good ideas for the essay especially since it talks about finding my self-identity. i believe that when we die, we become reborn as a new person b/c we leave behind our physical selves and the things that we’ve learned. although, there has been evidence that young children have a higher creative ability than adults since it is easier to start art as a child, than an adult since the child is more imaginative. also in my ap biology book, it says that a one week child may have a hind brain, fore brain and back brain. at 3 months, the child develops a cerebellum (allowing some crawling) and the brain slowly develops and different parts such as right hemisphere and left hemisphere develop in one year. children 10 and younger have neuroplasticity with their brains (Ben Carson discovered this) b/c the removal of one hemisphere (possibly due to seizure) is okay for the child since their other side takes over the functions of the missing half and they have the same cognitive ability. humans are truly complex and amazing creatures. it takes around 500 bee stings to kill a child, but 1500 to kill an adult. even though, adults have stronger immunity, children have better plasticity of their muscles and cells.

i wrote the short poems in 2013 when i was in seventh grade b/c there were times when i felt sad and lonely, but the times when i felt happy, i wrote the poems so when i was sad, i would read them and be inspired. i think this is a cool coincidence i woke up at 4:03 this morning and i turned on the radio and this song was playing called “If you Only Knew” by Shinedown. anyway the lyrics were “‘Cause it’s 4:03 and i can’t sleep without you next to me, I toss and turn like the sea.” i thought it was pretty cool, anyway at 4:03 pm, while i was writing a poem i heard a song on the radio that reminded me of the poem i was writing called ’embracing the light’ which is about embracing myself for who i truly am and letting the divine into my life. the song is called “Chasing Cars” by Snowy Patrol. and the part of the lyrics were “all that i am, all that i ever was is here is your perfect eyes. your all i can see. i don’t know where, confused about how as well. know that these things will never change for us at all.” i like this part of the lyrics b/c it’s about embracing life for its beauty even if you feel insecure b/c life is too short and also being confused or worried doesn’t make a situation better so you should just accept it as it is. also at 4:03 the full moon was quite bright in its light and at 6:20, i watched the moon become a small disc in the sky and disappear with the dawn breaking. i went out for a run at 6:20 this morning and when it was 6:26, the sun rose and the brilliant light shone upon the trees and the wind blowing, it was great. drinking in the sun’s rays as it began to illuminate the sky just as i was making my way home and when i was home, the sun had fully risen. i have a goal of being a molecular biologist at princeton university.

anyway looking back at some of the posts that i wrote on other sites, this seems to describe me. i am very passionate about my goals and have an immense willpower to see them through no matter what it takes and i don’t let strong emotions get in the way, but when i do, i use them to help me advance forward. i like to workout, but most of it’s moderate lifting and dancing. about the ducking and covering part, sometimes when i trust someone i trust them immensely and when i get mad at someone i get pretty irritated, so i have intense emotions that sometimes other people don’t like.

I am reserved, intellectual, introspective. Rarely does she do anything requiring a lot of energy or display of emotion — but when she does, anyone within a few planes would do well to duck and cover.