Hi Joanna. I’m dealing with a lot of the same issues you mentioned. One saying that I find to be true is,”good intentions pave the way to hell”. As it seems the harder you try to improve yourself or your situation the crappier things become. I’ve had horrible luck and tough breaks going on 10 years now. Now I’m no angel and some things I brought upon myself. But the price I’ve paid for making bad decisions seems to far out weigh anything I’ve ever done.

Without going into too much detail in just the past two years alone I’ve suffered a job loss due to down sizing,a car repossession and loss of my apartment as well as having to give up my best friend of 7 years,my cat Layla. All this while working hard and trying to stay positive.

I’m divorced and have very little family. My sister who married well and has a huge home turned me away and would not let me stay in her home. She chose my lowest point to tell me what she thinks of me.I’m a loser,I married poorly,I can’t support myself,( I was married for 15 years and we never asked anyone for help so go figure) and she doesn’t want me around her grown sons who still live at home because they struggle with substance abuse.I’ve been sober for 3 years.

My ex wife treats me like a dog even though I’ve been there for her through thick and thin for 20 years. I currently have no job,no friends and sleep on the floor of my mothers in a retirement community. Suicide looks pretty good right now but I refuse to give up.

The main thing I’ve noticed in hard times is people will show their true colors.They’ll kick you when you’re down,or they’ll extend a hand in kindness. Many people mistakenly view karma as a tit for tat system of balance,It is not,It simply represents the dual nature of this reality,duality. Karma in humans is used a mechanism to find balance while here. And if you believe in reincarnation as many religions do,then you and I might be working through things done in past lives that we’re not even aware of in this present incarnation.

Please feel free to discuss this further and feel better.

Hi J. I’m truly sorry to hear life has lost it’s magic for you so early in life. However you’re not the only one and it’s really not your fault.Instead of blowing smoke up your ass about how everything gets better,or it’s just a phase I will direct you to a topic I posted here a few weeks ago aimed at people just like you.
The topic is called Castles Made Of Sand and I posted it in the tough times category.I suggest you read it and then get the books I recommend at the end.Especially The Happiness Project.
I hope it helps you gain a better perspective on things.Life’s a bitch for us all my friend.Some just hide it better than others.

Hi Icy.Could’nt help but notice the SSRI in caps in your subject line.As a person who as taken these types of drugs for 20 years I can offer some advice.First though,you failed to mention why you’ve chosen to stop your meds.Can you elaborate?
Ragggggggggggggggggggge! Yeh I understand that.It’s a very common side effect of withdrawal from some meds and if you’re set on stopping the medication it is something you’ll have to deal with though it will pass.Just try to stop and talk to yourself saying,”this is just a withdrawal symptom it’s not my real personality or true feelings”. Also simpily remove yourself from the situation that is causing the anger.Treat youself like you have a cold,after all you are sick so get in bed and try to keep to yourself until you feel strong enough to deal.
Unfortunately the withdraws from these meds are usually worse than the original depression or anxiety you were treating.I swear it seems like the drug companies do this so you remain a slave to their product for life.Maybe just paranoia on my part but I’ve had some hellish withdrawals and to this day I still take 20MG of generic Lexapro daily which is really just a sugar pill for me but it makes me feel like I’m attempting to treat my depression.
Can you tell me what you don’t like about Celexa? I’m actually considering it for myself.My meds haven’t worked for me for quite some time.I actually did switch from Lexapro to a new drug call Viibyrd about 6 months ago and had my worst experience ever with that drug.Only took it for 1 month and I felt like I was on speed.Could’nt sleep,craved sugar like crazy and just spun myself into a frenzy.Stopping cold turkey even with only having I month of the drug in my system gave me brain zaps and the worst anxiety I’ve ever had.I swear a few times I thought I was having a heart attack! Needless to say NEVER take the drug Viibyrd.
Hope my advice helps a little.I know for me it helps to know someone is in the same boat as me.Kinda twisted huh !